Hoes Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Hoes jokes. There are some hoes hose jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these hoes lancer puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Laughter Hoes Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity

Personally, I don't believe in bros before hoes, or hoes before bros. There needs to be a balance.

A homie-hoe-stasis, if you will.

Why did Shakespeare break up with his girlfriend?

Prose before hoes.

Did you hear about the new farmers dating site?

It's full of hoes.

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods?

Santa stops at three hoes.
(sorry if repost)

jokes about hoes

What did the philanderer say to the gardener praying in the shed?

How do you stay faithful in a room full of hoes?

So a man hoes to a strip club

He sits down in the front row. A man sits behind him.
A girl comes out and starts dancing. Both of the men cheer.
She takes off her top. Both men cheer.
She takes off her bottom.Only the man in the front cheers.
Curious the man in front turns around and asks
Where'd all the enthusiasm go.
The man response. "all over your back"

What does Snoop Dogg keep in his backyard?

His garden hoes.

Hoes joke, What does Snoop Dogg keep in his backyard?

Bros v. Hoes

A woman doesn't come home one night. The next day she tells her husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend's house.
The husband calls his wife's 10 best friends. None of them know anything about it.

A man doesn't come home one night. The next day he tells his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house. The wife calls her husband's 10 best men friends. Eight of them confirm that he had slept over, and two claim that he was still there.

My friend, who is a landscaper, was cheating on his wife and I told him to stop.

He replied, "it's hard man.. I got to much love for the hoes"

I'm kind of like a fireman.

I turn the hoes on.

I like my sheds the way I like my strip clubs...

...dark and full of hoes

You can explore hoes mow reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean hoes shovel dad jokes. There are also hoes puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

What do Ludacris and Home Depot have in common?

They both have hoes in different area codes.

What do you say when you get cornered by a gang of Italian prostitutes?

"Uh-oh, spaghetti hoes!"

I like my hoes like I like my salad dressing...

On the side

What's the best part about gardening?

Getting down and dirty with your hoes.

Why do they call me the fireman?

Cause I turn on the hoes

Hoes joke, Why do they call me the fireman?

What does Santa want for Christmas?

HO! HO! HOES!

Being attractive is a requirement to become a firefighter...

Because they turn the hoes on.

When you'd rather read a book than date a girl ...

it's prose over hoes.

Why did the Strip club manager reject a retired Fireman's job application?

Becuase he'd fire hoes.

I work in construction...

We don't have side pieces, we have back hoes

What did the single writer say to his friend?

Prose before hoes

What do you call prostitutes that are out of breath?

Panty Hoes

What's it called when bros before hoes is balanced with hoes before bros?

Homie-hoe-stasis

What do a serial killer and a prolific gardener have in common?

Both of their sheds are filled with hoes.

Which season is a pimps favorite?

Fall, because he gets autumn hoes

Hoes joke, Which season is a pimps favorite?

Why is Santa so happy on Christmas?

Because he gets to call all the hoes.

"Where the hoes at?" asks John

as he walks into Home Depot

I dumped a girl because she wouldn't let me read poetry.

Prose before hoes.

I think I'd be a sick fireman

After all, I'm amazing at turning the hoes on.

Everyone's saying Bros before hoes ...

But if you ask me, I'd say you need a balance,

A homie-hoe-stasis, if you will.

What did the firemen turned pimp do to streamline his business?

Fire hoes.

Did you hear Buffalo Bill reformed and is now a pick up artist and skin care specialist?

He puts the lotion in the basket and then he gets the hoes again

Why does a Gardener make a decent Pimp?

They have experience dragging hoes outa beds

What do you call women with a fetish for firefighters?

Fire Hoes.

What do a rapper and a gardener have in common?

They both spend a lot of money on hoes.

You know the saying "bros before hoes"?

Well, I've found out how I can balance my relationships between the two evenly...



...a homie-hoe-stasis, if you will

What does an English pimp do, after having tea and crumpets?

Tally Hoes.

My girlfriend asked why I'm always playing fighting games instead of spending time with her.

I replied : Smash Bros before hoes

Pimps don't count their own money. They have their hoes do it for them.

It's the thot that counts.

What to you call a pimp with too many hoes? (Original joke)

A whoreder.

Hoes aren't lost

They are just looking for their soul mate

Now that he's divorced, what does Amazon's CEO do when he's feeling lonely?

Jeff pays hoes.

My rapper friend has started a really successful gardening tool delivery business.

He's got hoes in different area codes.

What do you call a Mexican-Canadian pimp business?

Hoes, eh?

Why did the gardener's wife leave him?

She always found him talking with with his hoes

What's a fireman's worst enemy?

Crazy wet hoes.

I don't believe in bros before hoes or hoes before bros. There needs to be a balance.

A homie-hoe-stasis if you will.

What does a pimp gnome use to make his money?

The garden hoes.

(OC) A devout christian Canadian man is walking down the street when a group of Latino male prostitutes walk up to him and ask if he wants to have a good time...

The Canadian man quickly shooed them away yelling as they went "No way hoes eh"

A man in his 60s hoes to a brothel

... constantly shaking from his Parkinson's.

He tells the madam I want 5 girls.

The madam says are you sure? 5 girls might kill you. But the man is adamant and soon enough he's in a room with 5 girls.

Shaking from every joint as he lays on the bed, he tells 2 girls: you two, hold down my arms.

Then he tells 2 more girls: you two, hold down my legs.
Finally, the last one, you get on top.

Now, you 4, let go!

I don't believe in bros before hoes

Personally I don't believe in bros before hoes, or hoes before bros. There needs to be a balance.



A homie-hoe-stasis, if you will.

They call me fireman

Cuz I turn on the hoes

what's the difference between a rapper and a country singer?

Country singers keep their hoes in the shed.

Do you know why they don't allow prostitutes on crew teams?

Because hoes are hard to row.

Some say Bros before Hoes. Some say Hoes before Bros

I prefer homie-hoe-stasis

A philosopher saw a pimp having a sale on some of his hoes

The philosopher said: a penny for your thots.

Bros Vs. Hoes. (credit to u/itshimstarwarrior)



*A woman doesn't come home one night. The next day she tells her husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend's house. The husband calls his wife's 10 best friends. None of them know anything about it.*

**A man doesn't come home one night. The next day he tells his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house. The wife calls her husband's 10 best men friends. Eight of them confirm that he had slept over, and two claim that he was still there.**

**(its not mine but of** u/itshimstarwarrior**, i find it quit funny)**

I have never agreed with the proverb "bros before hoes".

And that is why I was fired from my job at Oxford English Dictionary.

What do hoes and Walmarts have in common?

You may laugh at them sometimes, but when you're inside one at 4am you're thinking Damn I'm glad these are here

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the hoes yule puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working hoes ludacris piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes