Hobbit Jokes
96 hobbit jokes and hilarious hobbit puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hobbit that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Enjoy a chuckle with this collection of hilarious jokes that feature hobbits, their feet, house, movie, and more. From light-hearted jokes to jokes with a sting, this selection of hobbit-based humor will make you LOL. Also featuring jokes about elvish, smurfs, and Frodo, this article is guaranteed to provide plenty of laughs.
Quick Jump To
- Short Hobbit Jokes
- Hobbit One Liners
- Hobbit Lord Jokes
- Tolkien Hobbit Jokes
- Hobbit Movie Jokes
- Bad Hobbit Jokes
- More Hobbit Jokes
Funniest Hobbit Short Jokes
Short hobbit jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hobbit humour may include short hobo jokes also.
- My girl keeps having disturbed dream, shouting things like "Hobbit!", "Gandalf!", and "Mordor!". Always Tolkien in her sleep...
- I'm not saying it's a mistake letting my girlfriend control the thermostat... But two Hobbits just showed up and threw a ring into our bedroom.
- Why did the hobbit set his cell phone to vibrate? He was afraid the ring would give him away.
- My partner keeps on having disturbed dreams My partner keeps on having disturbed dreams, shouting things like "Hobbit!", "Mordor!" and "Gandalf!"
Always Tolkien in their sleep... - Why did Steve Bannon call Trump supporters working-class hobbits? Because they're friends with grand wizards.
- I'm not saying it's hot in my house... ...but a hobbit just threw a ring through the front door.
- Ringwraiths My daughter watching Lord of the rings:
D: So the hobbits call the nazgul the black riders right?
Me: yeah
D: the nazgul are like: 'yo, that's wraithist'
Cue facepalm. - Did you hear? Copies of The Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit, and The Silmarillion are considered one-of-a-kind when sold and traded. They're Non-Fungible Tolkiens.
- What do you call a Hobbit who works in advertising? Billboard Baggins
(From my son (9) who just finished Fellowship of the Ring and is well on his way to being a dad with jokes like this). - (One for those in the UK today) I'm not saying it's hot in my living room... But two Hobbits just walked in and threw a ring into it.
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Hobbit One Liners
Which hobbit one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hobbit? I can suggest the ones about bilbo baggins and lord of the rings.
- Why did Bilbo Baggins live for so long? Because old Hobbits die hard...
- A human, an elf and a dwarf walk into a bar... The Hobbit laughs and walks under it.
- Some people say that elves are very shy But I think hobbits can be Shire
- What do you call 8 hobbits? A hobbyte.
- I dreamt that I wrote the Hobbit the other day Turns out I was just Tolkien in my sleep
- Why did the Hobbit put his phone on silent? Because he was bored of the rings!
- What do you call introverted hobbits? Shyer folk
- What's it called when Hobbits build houses for other Hobbits? Hobbitat for Humanity
- What are 8 Hobbits? One hobbyte.
- What do hobbit homes with no entrances need? More doors.
- What do you call a hobbit from the Basque Country? Bilbao
- Why does nothing much change in the Shire? Force of hobbit.
- why did arwen and aragorn choose frodo to be the ring bearer ? Force of hobbit
- What's Frodo short for? He's a hobbit.
- What do you call an overweight hobbit's belly? His Middle Girth
Hobbit Lord Jokes
Here is a list of funny hobbit lord jokes and even better hobbit lord puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- How did Bilbo survive the entire lord of the rings trilogy? Because old Hobbits die hard...
- I had I dream I wrote The Hobbit, and Lord of the Rings trilogy. I was Tolkien in my sleep.
- Bruce Willis has been cast to play the lead role in the upcoming Lord of the Rings sequel. Old Hobbits Die Hard.
- Who should have played Bilbo? Who should have played Bilbo Baggins in Lord of the Rings? Bruce Willis. Because old hobbits die hard.
- Best films of all time Lord of the rings and the Hobbit trilogies... Now that's what I'm Tolkien about.
- What do you call it when someone likes Lord Of The Rings way too much? A Bad Hobbit.
- What do you call a hobbit who is good at the fiddle? Lord of the strings
- I was once obsessed with "The Lord of the Rings". The books, the movies, the collectables, everything. Finally I was able to kick the hobbit.
- I can't stop thinking about The Lord of the Rings books. They're hobbit-forming.
Tolkien Hobbit Jokes
Here is a list of funny tolkien hobbit jokes and even better tolkien hobbit puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I used to be a fan of reading Tolkien But then I kicked the hobbit
- You Tolkien to me?!" - Hobbit de Niro.
- People have been so nice lately that Ive begun to give them a copy of The Hobbit every time. You know, as a Tolkien of my appreciation.
- "The Hobbit" was one man's gift to the world A mere Tolkien of appreciation for all the world had done for him
Hobbit Movie Jokes
Here is a list of funny hobbit movie jokes and even better hobbit movie puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I think three movies is a bit much for the hobbit. Seems like they're really dragon it out.
Bad Hobbit Jokes
Here is a list of funny bad hobbit jokes and even better bad hobbit puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why didn't Spock do a mind meld with Frodo? Because he figured that would be a bad hobbit to get in to.
- Tolkein in puns Is a very bad hobbit.
Experience Good Cheer with Hilarious Hobbit Jokes and Friends
What funny jokes about hobbit you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean goblin jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hobbit pranks.
Why couldn't Frodo drop the Ring into Mt. Doom?
Force of Hobbit.
What did the drunken hobbit say when he bumped into a wizard?
sauromon, didnt see you there.
What do 8 hobbits make?
A hobbyte.
I'd like two tickets, please.
- Is it for The Hobbit?
- No, she's my girlfriend.
How do hobbit flowers grow?
Through Frodo-synthesis.
Guy goes to a movie theater to see "The Hobbit." A walrus sits down next to him.
"Excuse me, but are you... a walrus?" asks the man.
"Yes."
"What are you doing at the movies?"
Walrus: "Well, I liked the book."
Last night I was dreaming...
So last night I was dreaming that I was writing *The Hobbit* and *The Lord of the Rings* books but my wife complained that I was very loud and disturbed her sleep.
Apparently I was tolkien in my sleep.
What do you call a hobbit that looks good in pictures?
Frodo-genic
What do you call 13 dwarves and a hobbit inside a mountain?
A *smaugasbord*.
I can't stop making figurines of Frodo
It's hobbit forming.
A hobbit walks into a bar
It was very low down.
I bet old hobbit ladies watched a lot of "Mordor, She Wrote."
Did you know that all of the Hobbit films were recorded in L.A.
Yeah, you could tell by the Smaug.
What do you call a smelly Hobbit?
Frodor.
Just bought the extended version of The Hobbit.
Bilbo is 7' 6" now.
How do you become a hobbit?
Eat, shrink and be Merry!
A man went to the movie..
A man went to the movie theater's ticket window a second time and said, "One more."
"For The Hobbit?" the ticket vendor asked.
"No," the man replied, "That's my girlfriend."
An Elf, a Dwarf, and a Hobbit walk into a bar...
All three proceed to eat, drink and have a good time, slamming down pint after pint of ale until finally the pub was closing. The bartender asks them how he should split the tab as it was a pretty hefty sum.
"I got this," replies the Elf as he looks at the bill. "My two friends here are always a little short anyway."
Didja hear the one about the hobbit who ruined the boxing match?
He tried to destroy the ring.
Why did the hobbit fall
He had a Frodoian slip
Do you think Daniel Radcliffe could ever play a hobbit?
No, but Elijah would.
Frodo was chosen as the Ringbearer because...
it's hard to break a hobbit
What happened to the hobbit when he suffered a r**... injury?
They had to put a Colostomy Baggin.
Which hobbit is really good at advertising?
Billboard Baggins
Every time Galndalf sees a Hobbit he calls them Frodo.
He doesn't have Alzheimer's disease, he just does it out of force of Hobbit.
What do you call an annoying hobbit?
Douchebaggins
I like to imagine my fingers as the races of Middle Earth...
The thumb is the dwarf because it's stout
The pinkie is the hobbit because it's diminutive
The index is the elf because it's the most dexterous
The ring is the human because they were given the most rings
And the middle is the orc... because it's the rudest
What's a hobbits favorite drink?
Mountain Doom
What happens when Smaug gets a cold and coughs up a hobbit?
He becomes Dragon Ball Wheeze.
Why does the travelling hobbit always carry his elven cloak?
When he goes to pee in the woods and he brings out his other *precious*, he still gets the feeling that there's someone eyeing him.
What's the difference between a Halfing and a Hobbit?
Copyright
My four-year-old came up with this one:
What do you call a hobbit in blue pants? Lord of the jeans.
(This was after he heard the Alexa ask, what do you call a hobbit playing a fiddle? Lord of the Strings )
I was trying to sleep last night. Here's what happened.
Some dude has this bed right beside mine, and he randomly started saying this:
"I was born in 1892 in Bloemfontein. I wrote The Hobbit and The Lord of The Rings..."
For f**...'s sake he was Tolkien in his sleep!
What do you call a very rude Hobbit?
A douchebaggins.
What do you call the shack where all the halfling nuns wearing too small shoes live?
The hobbled habited hobbit habitat.
Why did Gandalf opt to send Frodo, of all beings, on the most perilous mission Middle-Earth had ever known?
Force of hobbit.
How does a Hobbit turn into a plant?
Frodosynthesis
A literary analysis asked why Bilbo had such a long life, even for a hobbit.
I answered: Because old hobbits die hard.
What do you call a Hobbit who isn't over their Ex?
Bilbo baggage.
What do you call an irritating Hobbit?
d**... Baggins.
Sauron tortures a hobbit.
Sauron captured Bilbo Baggins and tried to t**... him to tell where the magic ring was hidden. Soon the hobbit blurted out "I think Gollum has it!"
Then Sauron captured Gollum and tortured him, but the old evil and corrupted hobbit wouldn't talk.
It turns out bad hobbits are hard to break.
