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Hmm Jokes

100 hmm jokes and hilarious hmm puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hmm that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Feeling confused? Don't worry! This article will teach you about the "hmm" reply and its various meanings. See how the words "hmm," "yikes," "hah," and "dunno" can be used to respond to different kinds of situations. Find out when to use them and when to avoid them. Get ready for a hearty laugh!

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Funniest Hmm Short Jokes

Short hmm jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hmm humour may include short dunno jokes also.

  1. When god created man Gods assistant: Is it done?
    God: Hmm, add a little toe to his foot.
    Gods assistant: Why?
    God: For furniture.
    Gods assistant: Furniture?
    God: Believe me it'll be funny
  2. Interviewer: It says here you're skilled at saying unexpected things? Me: Yes, I am.
    Interviewer: Hmm, I thought you were going to say something unexpec-- oh, you're good.
  3. Doctor Am I pregnant? A lady goes to a doctor to find out if she is pregnant
    Doc: Hmm, Looks like your Preganant...
    Girl: Am I?
    Doc: No it just looks like you are
  4. A cannibal finishes baking a cake for the first time and says to himself: Hmm, I don't know, might need some fresh eyes on this .
  5. I heard there's this new pill that cures addiction. Hmm, I wonder what two of them will do...
  6. I asked the librarian if she had any books on skepticism. She said, "No."
    I said, "Hmm, let me check."
  7. Girl: You weren't even listening just now were you?! Guy Thinking: "Hmm, that's a weird way to start a conversation."
  8. A man goes to the doctor to report a serious memory loss problem Man: Doctor, I have a serious memory loss problem
    Doctor: Hmm.. and since when did you have this problem?
    Man: What problem?
  9. Hunchbacks would make great detectives They can start off every investigation saying, "Hmm, I have a hunch".
  10. *dinosaur at zoo roars at me* "ROAR"
    whoa wat kimd of dinosaur is this
    "GROWL"
    hmm
    "SHOUT"
    hmmm
    "YELL"
    hmmmmm
    "HOLLER"
    oh its a thesaurus"

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Hmm One Liners

Which hmm one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hmm? I can suggest the ones about hmm reply and gee.

  1. Making a good analogy is as hard as... Hmm...
  2. What did the math teacher when you got a 99 on a test? Hmm, that's odd.
  3. "So here are the plans for the Eiffel tower..." "Hmm. Yes, yes - this is Gustave!"
  4. A man s**... the blood of a vampire and he said.. Hmm, irony.
  5. How dare you say I'm dumb! Would a d**... get a 'A' on there IQ test? Hmm?
  6. I once saw a man with three t**... I thought to myself "Hmm, that's odd".
  7. Hmm.......extra v**... olive oil..... ......so that's why I can't get laid.
  8. A policeman shoots a black guy and says "Hmm, again" But the image was still blurry

Hmm Meaning Jokes

Here is a list of funny hmm meaning jokes and even better hmm meaning puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • - Where can I see you 😊 ? - In my photos 😴 ...

    - Hmm ... Ok ... But I mean closer 😎.

    - Zoom 😒

Uplifting Hmm Jokes to have Hilarious Fun with Friends

What funny jokes about hmm you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean yup jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hmm pranks.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

A man and a woman are chatting in an elevator.

"What are you up to today?" he asks.
"I'm going down to give blood."
"How much do you get paid for giving blood?"
"About $20 a pint."
"Hmm ...," the man, says. "I'm going up to donate s**..., and the s**... bank pays $100 a tablespoon."
The woman gets a strange look on her face and gets off the elevator.
The next day, they meet in the elevator again.
The man asks, "So, where you off to today?"
"Fmerm mank," she says, with her mouth full.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

A man walks up to a g**... the street

He asks her "would you have s**... with me for a million dollars?"
The girl replies "hmm.. for a millian dollars sure!"
The man asks "would you have s**... with me for free?"
The girl replies "for free? What kind of girl do you think I am?
The man replies "we've already found what kind of girl you are now we are just negotiating a price."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

A joke I was told by an old man I golfed with.

A man was at the bar with a couple of his neighbors. One of his friends says "Have you seen that new pool boy the Johnsons hired? I heard he's had his way with all the women in the neighborhood except one."
Worried, the man goes home and confronts his wife. "Honey I heard the new pool boy has had with every woman in the neighborhood except one, do you know anything about that?" She replies "hmm, I bet it's Betty, she's a real p**...."

An 85 year old man goes to his doctor...

"Doc, I got a big problem."
"I understand you were recently remarried, is that right?"
"Yes. My new wife is 23 years old, and that's exactly the problem. She just told me she's pregnant! I haven't been a father in sixty years, and I don't know what to do."
"Hmm. Let me tell you a story that I think will help explain what's going on here: A near sighted man decides to go bear hunting. On his way out the door, he accidentally picks up his umbrella instead of his rifle. Once he gets to the woods, he is instantly attacked by a ferocious 1,200 pound bear. He picks up his umbrella and shoots it dead. Does that story make sense to you?"
"No! Somebody else must have shot that bear."
"My point exactly."

A man goes to the doctor's office and says, "Doc, I've been throwin' up all day"

He tosses a ball up and it lands back in his hands. "See? This has been going on for hours and hours!"
The doctor studies him for a bit and then finally says, "Hmm... I think you've caught something..."

A waitress at a diner gives a man his check.

As he gets up to leave, he puts down the amount for the check plus three cents for the tip. The waitress notices this and approaches him before he leaves.
Waitress: You know, I can tell a lot about a person by each of the coins that are left.
Man: Okay, what do these pennies tell you about me?
Waitress: This first one tells me that you are very thrifty.
Man: Hmm. Yes, that's true. Go on.
Waitress: This second one tells me that you are not married.
Man: Yes, that's true too.
Waitress: And this last one tells me that your mother wasn't married either.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Two Blondes on a Street

Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, "Hmm, this person looks familiar." The second blonde says, "Here, let me see!" So the first blonde hands her the compact. The second one looks in the mirror and says, "You d**..., it's me!"

A man was interviewing for a position with the CIA (Part 1)

He turns up to the interview and there are two other guys.
The first guy gets taken in for an interview and is asked: Who killed Jesus Christ? He replies "The Jews".
The second guy gets taken in and is asked the same thing, to which he replies "The Romans".
The third guy (our guy) gets taken in and when asked the same question he replies "Hmm, I'll have to go home and think about that for a while".
When he got home, his wife asked how he went and he replied enthusiastically "It went really well, I've been assigned a case already!"

Three Nuns Die And Each Have To Answer A Question From God To Get Into Heaven...

God asks the first Nun, "Who were the first two people?"
She says, "Adam and Eve".
He says, "Okay, you're in."
God asks the second Nun, "Where did Adam and Eve live?"
She says, "The Garden of Eden".
He says, "Okay, you're in."
God asks the third Nun, "What was the first thing Eve said when she saw Adam?"
She says, "Hmm, that's a hard one."
He says, "Okay, you're in."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

A wife's husband and her lover end up at the same backyard party.

They are actually talking to each other, though somewhat unacquainted. The wife wants to somehow interject and separate the two.
"Honey, do you want a beer?"
"Yes."
"Yes."
She hustles off. flustered and embarrassed at **both** of them responding.
The husband looks wryly at the gentleman next to him..
"Hmm.." he begins thinking. "How did *he* know I wanted a beer?"

A tree with anxiety.

A tree had been filled with anxiety and decides to see a psychologist.
"I just don't know what to do," the tree said. "Every year I feel very anxious during fall and winter."
"Hmm, interesting," the psychologist said, "And how do you feel when spring comes?"
The tree smiles, "Releaved!""

The owners of a micro-brewery are sitting around a table having their monthly board meeting.

The accountant stands up and says "So, let's see, this month, we lost ... hmm... hmm... Hey! Does anybody have a black pen?"
The CEO says "I can go buy one."
The accountant replies "Yeah, but then we won't need it anymore."

"Doctor, everytime i drink hot coffee my eye will feel hurt."

"Hmm, i never heard about this before. Anyways can you make a coffee and drink it now?
Of course."
The doctor give him a cup of hot water, an instant coffee and a spoon. The old man makes the coffee as usually and drink it. Then the doctor said,
"Oh i see! You forgot to remove the spoon!

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

My time machine landed right in the middle of h**...'s living room

I thought to myself, now's my chance to make the world a better place
"Please sir," I pleaded, "Don't gas the Jews."
"Gas the Jews?" h**... replied, "Hmm, I hadn't thought of that."

Got my wife during the game last night

Hit my wife with this yesterday during the game, paraphrasing:
Wife: so it's the Los Angeles Chargers now?
Me: yeah they moved the team a few years ago
Wife: but aren't the raiders Los Angeles?
Me: no it's Las Vegas
Wife: oh I got the Los and Las mixed up
Me: hmm I guess you're at a Los for words
She didn't like it as much as I did :D

A mathematician, a biologist and a physicist.

A mathematician, a biologist and a physicist are sitting on a Starbucks patio across from an abandoned building when a car pulls up, and two people get out and enter the building.
A few minutes go by, three people exit the building, get into the car and drive off.
"Hmm," says the physicist, "our original count must have been inaccurate."
"Ahh," says the biologist, "they must have reproduced!"
"Aha!" says the mathematician, "now if exactly one person enters the building, it will be empty again!"

Blonde Moments: Life with a Blonde Teenage Daughter

SCENE: My teenage daughter and me in the car.
Lauren: Dad, do you know what the most commonly used letter in a girl's name is?
Me: Hmm, is it a consonant or a vowel? (Silence.) Please tell me you know what consonants and vowels are.
Lauren: You're no fun, Dad. Forget it.
Me: What is a vowel?
Lauren: OK, OK. A vowel is … ahh … eh … well, oh … uh …
Me: Close enough.

I saw a boy eating the grass between the cracks in the curb

I went up to him and said "don't eat the grass, it's bad for you"
He looked at me and said "I haven't had any food for the last 3 days. This is all I can find"
I told him to get up and to come over to my place to get him a better meal
He stopped and said "well, my sister, she hasn't eaten in 3 days either"
I thought for a second and went, "hmm I don't know, I don't really have a very big lawn"

A woman brought her husband to a doctor to try to cure his snoring problem.

Dr.: "it is possible to treat, but it will cost you a lot of money."
Woman: "that's fine, how much will it cost?"
Dr.: "$20,000 down payment, and $250 in monthly intervals for a year."
Woman: "woah, its almost like im buying a sports car!!"
Dr.: "hmm... too obvious, huh?"

A boy tells his father that humans are cruel

"Hmm okay, but why?" asked the father.
"Well some people out there are hanging horses" said the son.
The father let out a confused chuckle, "What do you mean people are hanging horses?!"
The son tells him "well I overheard mum telling her friend that the plumber who came over to fix the drain pipes was hung like a horse."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

An elderly woman is moving into a retirement home

As part of the admissions process she has a check-up by the resident doctor. The doctor asks, "So have you been having any problems?"
Woman: "Well, I have noticed something unusual. I have this hole in my chest between my b**...."
Doctor: "Hmm, let me have a quick look."
The woman lifts up her blouse.
The doctor bends over to take a closer look, and she says, "Oh you really have nothing to worry about. It's just your belly button."

A Polish woman is visiting her friend

A Polish woman is visiting her friend. They are sitting talking at the kitchen table when her friend looks out the window and sees her husband carrying a bouquet of flowers. She turns to her Polish friend and says "great, now I'm going to have my legs up in the air all night"
Her friend replies "hmm usually I just use a vase"

A boy goes into confession...

The boy tells the priest, "Father I'm afraid I've been with a loose girl."
"Hmm, ok son, what was the girls name?"
"Oh I can't say."
"Was it Mary Jane?"
"No Father."
"Adalina Mozarelli?"
"My lips are sealed."
"How about Cindy King"
"I can never say."
"Oh come on boy, I'll find out soon enough. It was Tina King wasn't it!?"
"No."
"It has to be Tracy Cummings though!"
"Father I will never tell you."
"Ok fine, but for your sin you can't be alter boy for four months."
"Ok, Father"
The boy leaves and his friend asks, "So what'd you get?"
The boy responds, "Five good leads, and a four month vacation!"

Asking someone's favorite month (Bar joke)

A man walks into a bar and asks the guys beside him
Hmm do you have a favorite month?
The guy replied
Yes July
The man then asks
Why July?
The guy replies again
No no no July is actually my favorite month I didn't lie

Amputate?

Doctor: Mr. Franco, I'm sorry to tell you that your leg has developed gangrene, and if we don't amputate immediately, you may die due to infection.
Shall I schedule the surgery?
Mr. Franco: Hmm... I'm gonna go out on a limb and say no.

I went for a job interview

And at the end they asked me, So, last question: what would you say is your worst quality?
Worst quality? , I replied, well I've been told that I often jump to conclusions...
Hmm, ok. Well, thanks very much for coming in, we'll be in touch
No problem! See you Monday!

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

A Washington h**... gets a tattoo of Mike Pence on one inner thigh and one of Bill Barr on the other ...

Then when she gets a customer, she says, "If you can name both of them, I'll give you one for free."
Customer replies, "Hmm, I don't know about those two, but the one in the middle is Mitch McConnell."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Sore Paws

Little Johnny calls his dad, 'Dad those two dogs over there, why is the one at the front giving the one at the back a ride?'
'Errr, hmm, well son, the one at the back has saw front paws, so the one at the front is giving him a lift home'
'It's always the same innit dad'
'What's that son?'
'You try and help someone out, you end up getting f**...!'

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Two older couple…

Two older couple in their 80's rented a room at a fancy hotel on the 59th floor. They got into an argument and the woman threaten to jump out the window. The old guy call down to the front office and asked to speak with the manager. He said " look hmm me and my wife just got into a big fight and now she's threatening to jump out the window." The manager replied "I am so sorry to hear that, but normally we don't get involve in domestic situations." The old man replied "look a**... I don't need your help ok I just want you to send the maintenance guy up here to open the d**... window already."

Driving Down The Street

I was driving down the street when i saw a black man with a tv, i thought to myself hmm that looks just like mine but when i got home mine was still there washing my car like i told him to.

kid: Dad, what's a 'gossip'?

Dad: "hmm... I think you could says that a gossip is a person with a great sense of rumour."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

I was in the shoe shop getting my feet measured.

"Hmm," she said, "I'd say you're a 5 and a half...possibly a 6."
I said, "Shut up, you aren't too good looking yourself!"

What does a police officer in rural Pennsylvania say when he sees suspicious behavior?

"Hmm, something's Amish here."

A Job Interview... "What is your biggest weakness? What is your biggest strength?"

In my job interview, the interviewer told me I had done very well, and he had two final questions for me...
1) what is your biggest weakness?
2)what is your biggest strength?
I said "Well my biggest weakness is that i have trouble discerning between real life and fantasy"
The interview said "okay then, and what is your biggest strength then?"
I replied " Hmm, either that I can fly, or that I can turn invisible."

I tried to lie to the bouncer about my age when so I could enter the club...

Me: "23 sir".
Bouncer: "Hmm you don't look 23..."
Me: "Oh stop it you're making me blus-"
Bouncer: "You look like you're in your 30s".

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

A man goes to doctor...

"Doc, I can't sleep"
"Okay, let's have a look. Hmm... okay, sir, I think you have to quit m**..."
"Why?"
"So that I can examine you"

Magicians in The Future

"I need a volunteer. Hmm... Yes, you! The attack helicopter in the red shirt!"

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Have you heard the one about the gay termite?

He only eats mail boxes. (male boxes).
Hmm. Works way better when told out loud.

Mary and Joseph talking

Mary: Oh no my period is late
Joseph: Oh no how late
Mary: I dunno, what's the date
Joseph: hmm, according to the calendar it's 9 months BC
Mary: 9 months what now

Two friends discussing dinner plans.

Friend 1: hey friend 2 what do you want to eat tonight
F2: hmm I'm thinking fish
F1: fish?!?! Why fish?
F2:... for the halibut.

Interviewer: "Where do you see yourself in 5 years?"

Candidate: "Let me check my Jira backlog. Hang on.. Ok, on this page.. then this page.. 5 years.. hmm... It looks like I will be watching Dragon Ball Super 2."
Interviewer: ...

A man walking down the street thinks he recognizes someone.

Don't I know you from Toledo?
I've never been to Toledo.
Neither have I. Hmm, must have been two other people.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

A bird lands in a bush between two others..

He turns to one on his right and asks s**... ? The other bird replies angrily No spit! . He looks at the bird to his left Hmm thorny subject .

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

"Hmm," I said to the fishmonger, examining the selection. "I've got the munchies, I will eat any of these."

"Smoked trout?" he asked.
"No," I replied. "Just a little bit of w**...."

Coming back to London after his latest tour ended in Brazil, Phil Collins found that his head was itching.

He thought, "Hmm, I'd better see someone about this," and got himself to a doctor.
Sure enough, the doctor found small insects in his scalp. He asked, "Were you by any chance riding a llama with fleas?"
"No," Phil said, "it's all been alpaca lice."

I'm told to give a joke next week in my class

It's this new thing the tutor wants to do, now I'm not sure what kind of joke I should give to an IT class. Hmm.. suggestions?
P.S. Sorry if this isn't allowed, if so just do what you need to do.
Thanks! :)

Hmm...

🤔 So you "know" horror but you can't even name the writer and director of Sleepaway Camp (1983)? Okay... 🙄😂

Hmm, wine or beer... that's the decision.

Which one do I throw at the TV while a Christmas movie's playing?

Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm turnip

Hmm, let's see if we can get to the root of the problem.

"What's your biggest weakness?"

"I'm too complacent."
"Hmm. And your biggest strength?"
"That's irrelevant. When can I start?"

I was talking to my creepy coworker

I told him "I like my women like I like my coffee, strong and sweet." He said "Hmm. I like mine like I like my salad." "Well dressed?" I asked him.
"No. Chopped."

Two old friends are catching up for the first time in a few months.

Dave: How's those memory pills you're on Bill, are they working?
Bill: They're fantastic mate, couldn't be happier. I'm remembering old faces, recalling old times, I'm very happy.
Dave: Hmm, what are they called, I might have to get some for myself.
Bill: Oh, umm, gee, what's the name of that flower?
Dave: Daisy?
Bill: No no no, the really pretty flower.
Dave: A tulip?
Bill: No, that's not it either, the romantic flower that grows in the garden.
Dave: A rose?
Bill: Yes! That's it, a rose. (Yelling to his wife) Hey Rose, what's the name of that medication I'm on?!
Be kind, it's my first joke...

A guy is at a wedding looking for something to drink.

He looks around the main area for an open bar or something similar, yet he can't find anything.
Hmm weird he thinks to himself, you'd think they would serve drinks at these type of events
Suddenly he realizes he just saw a guy with a drink in his hand, so he goes up to him and asks him where he got it
Over there
He says while pointing over to a row of people standing in line for something.
What's that? The guy asks
That's the punchline

So a blonde is invited to a Lying competition

The goal of the competition is to tell the most convincing, outrageous lie. The blonde thinks for days and days over what lie she is going to tell but she is never able to come up with a good one.
On the day of the competition, she walks up on stage, still lacking a good lie. She reaches for the microphone, grasping for any idea, and stares at the crowd. "hmm, let me think about this", she mutters to herself.
The crowd breaks into cheers and applause, confetti falls from the sky, and the Judge walks up to her, and gives her the first place award.

1 very stretched breast.

A lady walks into the doctors office,

Doctor: So what's wrong?
Lady: Well... I've got 1 normal breast and 1 very stretched breast and i don't know what to do
Doctor: Surely it isn't as bad, let me see.
\*The lady lifts her shirt and her right breast just drops out to her knee\*
Doctor: WOW! i have never seen anything like this! How is this possible?
Lady: I know right? well there is one thing..
Doctor: Tell me?
Lady: Well my husband wants to hold my breast when he sleeps.
Doctor: Hmm, but that shouldn't cause this big of a stretch..

Lady: But.. we do sleep in a bunkbed.

Trump asks a man to give an example of a tragedy

The man: Well, my cousin passed away, that was a tragedy.
Trump: No believe me that was a loss, not a tragedy.
The man: Okay well my sister tripped and sprained her ankle, that was a tragedy.
Trump: Hmm, no that was an accident.
For the third time, the man says: Okay let's say you were flying in a plane and it was shot down, that would be a tragedy.
Trump: Good! Now why is that a tragedy? .
Well, Mr. Trump, it was certainly no loss and I am sure it was not an accident!

A man is hiking through the Welsh mountains...

A man is hiking through the Welsh mountains with his pet newt when he comes across a pub. He enters the pub and sees that there is a sign that says dogs are allowed in.
"Can I bring my pet newt inside?" The man asks the bartender.
"Hmm, I suppose so." The bartender says, slightly sceptical.
The man leaves and enters again with the biggest newt the bartender had ever seen. It was almost a meter long and the bartender was shocked silent.
"This is my newt: Tiny." The man tells the bartender.
"Tiny? But it's massive!" The bartender says in shock.
"He's called Tiny because he's my newt."

A Jewish man calls the newspaper to publish an obituary notice for her wife

Shlomo: Hello, This is Shlomo, I want to publish an obituary notice for my wife Rachel.
Agent: Hello Shlomo, how shall we publish it, do you have any words in mind?
Shlomo: "Rachel is dead". That's enough.
Agent: Sir you can write more; its the same price.
Shlomo: Hmm okay, "My wife Rachel is dead."
Agent: Sir, it is the same price up to 9 words, are you sure this is enough?
..after a moment of pause
Shlomo: "My wife Rachel is dead, Ford Fiesta for Sale."

So a blonde goes to a lying competition...

The goal of the competition is to tell the most convincing, outrageous lie. The blonde thinks for days and days over what lie she is going to tell but she is never able to come up with a good one.
On the day of the competition, she walks up on stage, still lacking a good lie. She reaches for the microphone, grasping for any idea, and stares at the crowd. "hmm, let me think about this", she mutters to herself.
The crowd breaks into cheers and applause, confetti falls from the sky, and the Judge walks up to her, and gives her the first place award.
( i think this is original, it works better the way my father said it in hindi, but it I hope yall like it)

A man is praying in church.

He looks up to heaven and says "God, could you answer a question for me?"
"Of course, my son," says God, "what would you like to know?"
"God, what is a million years to you?"
"Well," says God, "a million years to me is as a second."
"Hmm," says the man. "I guess I understand. So what is a million dollars to you then?"
"My son," God says, "a million dollars to me is as a penny."
"Hmm," says the man. He goes back to praying, but after a little while he looks up again.
"God," he asks, "can I have a penny?"
"Sure," God says. "Just a second."

A magicians last trick

A magician stood in front of a crowd. "For this last trick I will make myself appear in 100 different places around this very room" said the magician. The crowd watched in disbelief. "3...2...1...abracadabra". Yet the magician was still there. "Hmm let me try that again 3...2...1...abracadabra". Nothing. The magician starts to panic and checks his handbook for the instructions. "Ah ha!" says the magician. "I wasn't saying the correct magic word". He stands in front of the crowd again and says "3...2...1...ALLAHU AKBAR".
Needless to say the crowd was blown away.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

At the f**... home

How do you want your mother-in-law buried or cremated?
Hmm No risk do both.

There was a young boy named Jim...

Jim was at school, and it was time for lunch. At lunch, there were two choices for a drink besides water: a fruit punch or a soda pop. Jim decided, "Hmm, I'm feeling in the mood for a soda pop." And so, he headed to the soda pop line. When he got there, he realized that the line was extremely long. It nearly had the entire school! Jim was an impatient person, so he said to himself, "Nah, maybe a fruit punch will be better." Jim headed to the line for fruit punch. When he got there, there was no punchline.

Baby Balloon

One night Dad balloon says to baby "don't come into our bed in the middle of the night". However one day Baby balloon creeps in and goes between Mum and Dad balloon. He thinks "hmm there isn't much room here" so he lets a bit of air out Mum balloon. He thinks "still not enough room" so he lets a bit of air out Dad balloon. "He thinks "it's still a bit tight" so he lets a bit of air out himself. "He thinks that's better" and goes to sleep. The next morning Mum and Dad balloon are very angry. Dad balloon says" you've let ME down you've let your MUM down, but most of all you've let YOURSELF down."

jokes about hmm