Hispanic Jokes

Following is our collection of latin humor and spaniard one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Hispanic puns for adults, dirty puto jokes or clean rican gags for kids.

There is an abundance of vato jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 64 funniest jokes on hispanic. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any mexico witze you can hear about hispanic.

The Best jokes about Hispanic

Why did the Mexican take a Xanax?

For hispanic attacks

Why does the american border patrol guard take Xanax?

To stop hispanic attacks.

My Mexican uncle takes anti-anxiety medication

It's for Hispanic attacks

I started an emo salsa band

We're called Hispanic at the Disco

Why does Trump take Xanax?

For Hispanic attacks!

A hispanic magician was performing a magic trick

The magician said that he could make himself disappear within 3 seconds! So, he waves his cape in front of his face and says "uno, dos!" and just like that, he disappeared without a tres!

How do you advertise a boxing match between a Hispanic construction worker, and a Catholic priest.

Alien vs predator

Hispanic and black jokes are really all the same...

Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal.

Where does a Mexican go when they feel threatened?

Hispanic Room

A Hispanic photon walks into a bar

No mas

What do you call a Hispanic sniper?

A Puerto-recon.

Why was the Mexican prescribed Xanax?

For Hispanic attacks.

What do you call a Hispanic with binoculars?


Some say Trump is mentally unfit after declaring a national emergency?

However, it's all due to Hispanic attacks.

Why did the Mexican take Valium?

For Hispanic attacks

What do you call a short Mexican researcher in Antarctica?

A Burrito

First joke I've ever come up with. My Hispanic wife laughed her butt off.

A man with anxiety accidentally annoyed the cartel

He began seeing a psychiatrist because of hispanic attacks.

What did the mexican do when he lost his car in the parking lot?

He pressed hispanic button

Why did the Portuguese guy take Xanax?

Hispanic attacks.

There is a Hispanic train conductor going around committing horrible crimes..

No one knows why, but it's clear he has a loco motive.

Why are Hispanic dwarves called Paragraphs?

They're too short to be called Essays.

U.S Border Patrol

Putting the panic in Hispanic

Why did the Mexican take anti-anxiety medication?

For Hispanic attacks.

Say El Mundo to a Hispanic you know...

It would mean the world to them

Hispanic Magician

So a Mexican magician stands up in front of his audience and tells them, "Ok hombres, on the count of three, I'm gonna make myself disappear! Uno, dos..." POOF! He disappeared without a tres.

I need a joke in to tell my Hispanic manager!

I tried telling my boss a corny joke but he said he didn't get it because it was too 'American'(his words not mine). So i told him I'd find a joke in Spanish and try telling him it. I want to make my boss laugh so help me out guys! So if you know any work friendly jokes in Spanish post them here with a translation. Thanks!

What do you call an old Hispanic immigrant?

A seΓ±or citizen.

Why did the Mexican go to the psychiatrist?

His-panic disorder.

What did the Hispanic firefighter name his kids?

JosΓ© and Hose-B

Hispanic Joke

Three kids are in school...

A white, a black, and a hispanic kid. The teacher tells them to make a sentence with the words liver and cheese.

White kid says: "My mom made me a liver and cheese sandwich and it was sooo good."
Black kid says: "Pops told mom to go get the Government cheese And she didn't, so pops punched her in the liver."

Hispanic kid says: "Some kid was trying to look under my sister's dress and I told the cabron, "Hey!!! Liver alone, cheese my sister!!"

Mexican Basketball

I watched my two Hispanic cousins play basketball. It was a game of juan-on-juan.

I told my Mexican friend that he was being deported...

You should have seen Hispanic

A little hispanic boy was next to his mother while she was making tortillas...

A little hispanic boy was next to his mother while she was making tortillas. He dumps his face into the flour, ruining it and says to his mother, "Look mom! I'm a white boy!". Shocked the mom spanks that boy and afterwards tells hims "Go show this to your father!" He goes to his father and says "Look dad!, I'm a white boy!" and his father proceeds to spank him as well and sends him off his grandmother. He goes to his grandmother and says "Look abuela I'm a white boy..." She turned furiously red and berated him. Then she spanked him and said said "Show this to my husband!", not wanting to call him his grandfather. He went to his grandfather and sorrowfully said "Look pampo... I'm ... a white boy." His grandfather didn't just spank him, he proceeded to beat him. Once he was done, the boy was sent back to his mother.

His mother asked, "What did you learn?"

The boy replied, "I've only been white for an hour, and I learned that I already hate you wetbacks!"

A Hispanic man goes to a vending machine...

A Hispanic man goes to a vending machine and puts in 40 cents. The machine displays "DIME" on the screen. The man gets close to the machine and whispers, "Yo quiero Pepsi"

I've been very anxious about being mugged while on holiday in mexico, so I've been taking Valium to calm my nerves.

So far I haven't had any Hispanic attacks.

So a Hispanic man walks into a bar...

He sees an old cigarette machine and decides to buy a pack. He puts in his change and the machine flashes the words, DIME, DIME, DIME. He looks around and whispers to the machine, Malboro.

What do you call a Hispanic midget?

A paragraph. He's too short to be called esse.

Three supermodels are on a plane that's going down over the Atlantic Ocean

While they're putting on their life preservers, they start talking about what they're going to wear.

The white woman says I'm going to wear my hot pink bikini, because when they rescue us they'll easily be able to see it and hot pink really accentuates my features.

The Hispanic woman says I'm going to wear my bright yellow bikini because it really brings out my eyes and it's much more visible than hot pink is so I'll be rescued first.

The black woman says I'm going to go naked

Perplexed, the other two ask why.

She answers because in a plane crash the first thing they look for is the little black box!

Why did the spanish take his anti-anxiety pills ?

For hispanic attacks.

What do you call a Hispanic without a car?


What do you call a healthy Hispanic man?


A joke i heard recently and i have to share it

What do you call a small hispanic man?

Paragraph because he is too small to be an ese

Two Hispanic guys are having a private conversation

A little Juan on Juan.

Why did a Hispanic man rob a train?

He had loco motives!

Do you hear about the Hispanic magician who made himself vanish?

He counted uno, dos... and disappeared without a tres.

My ex girlfriend is a brick

Flat on both sides and laid by hispanic men.

What do you call a very nosy spice?

JalapeΓ±o Business

You need to say this in a pretty thick Hispanic accent for it to work. I heard it from some classmates.

[OC] A Hispanic man died from fear

I don't think Hispanicing anymore.

Why did Donald Trump decide not to build The Wall and just take a Xanax instead?

Because it's a cheaper and faster cure for hispanic attacks.

An Asian guy, Hispanic guy, white guy, black guy and their pilot are on a plane...

Suddenly the plane loses control and the pilot says, "If three people jump off, the rest can survive.
The Asian guy goes "This is for my people" and jumps off.
The Hispanic guy goes "This is for my people" and jumps off.
The black guy goes "This is for my people", and kicks the white guy off the plane.

A Hispanic man, a European man, and an Asian man are put on a deserted island

They are told that they will be rescued in 24 hours, provided they have proved their survival skills.
The Hispanic man is in charge of building a shelter, the European man is in charge of finding food, and the Asian man is in charge of finding supplies.
The three men go their separate ways to complete their tasks.
24 hours later, the rescue team comes back to the island in the hopes of seeing that the three men can prove their survival skills.
The Hispanic man takes the rescue team to his shelter that he built, and the rescue team is pleased with his work.
The European man takes the rescue team to his stash of food that he has accumulated, and the rescue team is pleased with his work.
However, the Asian man with his supplies is nowhere to be found.
The rescue team walks around the island, searching for the Asian man and the supplies he was supposed to find, when suddenly the Asian man jumps out of the bushes and yells SUPPLIES!

A Hispanic man was shot on a golf course mid-swing

The police report simply stated:
"Hole in Juan"

Did you hear about the hispanic that's been stealing all the trains?

I heard he has some loco motives. (Locomotives)

A Hispanic magician told his audience he would disappear on the count of three.

He held up three fingers and began.

"Uno! Dos!"

And then he vanished, without a tres.

What do you call a Hispanic guy's quest to get gender reassignment surgery?

Manuel Trans Mission

If Trump is so worried about border security, maybe he should take Prozac.

You know, for Hispanic attacks.

There was a scared Spanish man at a club

Hispanic at the disco.

A newlywed couple were renovating their new house.

When they came to do the kitchen, they couldn't decide on which sink to choose. There were loads of nice looking models in the catalogue, and there were quite a few that matched the other decor.

One day, they were in the kitchen trying to finally decide on which one to choose. All of a sudden, a Hispanic man smashed through the window and started screaming that they had to choose the Waterbasin model.

The wife fainted from shock, and the man simply stood there with his jaw on the floor, too surprised to do anything.

Nobody expects the Spanish Sink Decision.

A hispanic man with a rubber toe

His name...was Roberto

Have you heard about the new emo-punk band taking Mexico by storm?

They're called *Hispanic! At the Disco*.

Why did the Mexican . . .

Why did the Mexican take Xanax?

- For Hispanic attacks

Why did the Mexican Army invade the Alamo with only 5,000 troops?

- Because they only had two vans

Why did the Mexican train driver kill all his passengers?

- No one knows! He must have had a locomotive

Why did the Mexican throw his wife off a cliff?

- Tequila

What do you call a homosexual Hispanic living in the United States? (NSFW)


I don't always seduce hispanic Star Trek fans...

but when I do, I prefer dos Trekkies

What do you call a hispanic man who spilled his nachos?

A messycan

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes