Hire Professional Jokes
10 hire professional jokes and hilarious hire professional puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hire professional that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Giggle-Inducing Hire Professional Jokes for Joyful Times with Friends
What is a good hire professional joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Tom had been a compulsive worrier for years...
...until he found a way to overcome this problem.
His friends noticed the dramatic change.
"You don't seem to be worried about anything anymore."
"I hired a professional worrier for $1000.00 a week, Tom replied.
'I haven't had a single problem since."
"A thousand a week," said Doug. "You can't afford that, how are you going to pay him?"
"Tom replied, "That's his problem."
A farmer posted on his local subreddit that he was looking to hire help to fix his fence...
The farmer's wife asked him, Why would you look to hire someone from the internet? Surely they will not be up to the physical demands of lifting and setting these heavy fence posts!
The Farmer replied We need a professional, and I heard that there is no one more experienced than a Redditor at re-posting.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I ran into a complete stranger at my mom's annual New Years party.
I had never seen him before, so I asked him how he knew my mom. He said he had met her earlier in the day. Apparently, my mom was worried that the overall environment of the party wouldn't be as cool as she had hoped for, so she hired a professional to gauge the room.
I was absolutely disgusted.
I had found my mom's v**... rater.
I recently started remodeling my house and quickly got in over my head, so I decided to get some professional help.
I also hired a contractor to work on my house.
Magento Development Sevice
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⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
m**... is like...
DIY s**... and can save you money from hiring a professional.
Why did the company hire the glutton?
Because he was a *consume*ate professional!
I really don't like hiring "professional" kitchen re-modelers...
I find they are always counter-productive.
Jack had been a compulsive worrier for years
to the point it was ruining his life. He saw a psychologist who recommended a specialist who could help him. His friend, Bob, noticed a dramatic change and asked, "What happened? Nothing seems to worry you anymore."
"I hired a professional worrier and I haven't had a worry since," replied Jack.
"That must be expensive," Bob replied.
"He charges $5,000 a month," Jack told him.
"$5,000!!! How in the world can you afford to pay him?" exclaimed Bob.
"I don't know. That's his problem."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So Bill Gates hires a p**......
After the Hugh Grant incident that made the papers, Bill Gates called up Hugh Grant.
Bill asked him "was it really worth $50 to almost ruin your career?" Hugh replied "Bill, actually it was worth a million".
So Bill called up Hughes' favorite p**..., but since she became so famous, her prices had gone up quite a bit. So Bill paid $10,000 for a night with Divine.
In the morning he said, "That was fantastic! Now I know why professionally you call yourself 'Divine'".
She answered "Thank-you, and now I know why you call your company Microsoft."
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