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Hips Jokes

130 hips jokes and hilarious hips puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hips that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

If you love big hips, then you will love these hilarious jokes about them! Read some of the funniest jokes about hips, gluteus, legs, and rattlers. Get ready to crack up with these sidesplitting gags!

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Funniest Hips Short Jokes

Short hips jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hips humour may include short legs jokes also.

  1. A judge asked Shakira if she commited tax fraud. Shakira: "Of course not your Honor."
    Shakiras Hips:"Of course we did your Honor."
  2. I just had hip replacement surgery It's a really new procedure; you've probably never heard of it.
  3. The other day a girl asked me if I like b**... or thighs. I told her I prefer bubble butts and a trimmed p**... with thin lips... So I got kicked out of KFC.
  4. My grandma just walked into my room with a young barista wearing thick rimmed glasses. I said, Who is that?
    Grandma: That's my hip replacement.
  5. Why is hip hop popular among urban youth? because it's the only time a black man can tell a crowd of white people to put their hands in the air.
  6. My grandpa just walked into the room with a young man wearing skinny jeans and a beard. I said, Who is this, grandpa?
    Grandpa: He's my hip replacement.
  7. Who's the coolest guy at the hospital? - The Ultra Sound guy
    *Bonus*
    Who covers for him when he isn't there?
    - The Hip Replacement guy
  8. Why was Dre's grandma so happy when she found out his career choice? Because there was finally a Doctor in the family who could perform her hip op.
  9. I saw your post about the prostate exam and ease you this. When you're getting your prostate exam, make sure the doctor only has ONE hand on your hip...
  10. Who's the coolest guy at the hospital? The ultra sound guy.
    Who's the coolest guy when he's not around?
    The hip replacement guy.

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Hips One Liners

Which hips one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hips? I can suggest the ones about heels and skins.

  1. Giving birth is terrible for a cow's hips… …but it's great for their calves.
  2. What breaks when you give it to a twelve year old? Her hips.
  3. What's a spring flower's favorite type of music? Tulip-hip hop!
  4. Who is the coolest doctor in the hospital? The hip doctor.
  5. How did the programmer celebrate his birthday? var celebration = ["Hip", "Hip"];
  6. What kid of music do old people listen to? Hip-Pop
  7. [ Hip , Hip ] Hip hip array
  8. What kind of music to chiropractors listen to? Hip hop.
  9. Who's the coolest man in the hospital? The hip replacement guy.
  10. My Hip Hop name is DJ Green Onion. But you can call me Rapscallion.
  11. What do you call a one legged rapper? A Hip-Hop artist
  12. How do old people become cool again? Hip replacements!
  13. What does an aging Sith lord with a bad hip use to get around? An Imperial Walker
  14. Who takes over when the Ultrasound man is on leave? The Hip Replacement Guy.
  15. I'm so hip... I'm practically a pelvis!

Big Hips Jokes

Here is a list of funny big hips jokes and even better big hips puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What do you call dinosaur with big hips? A Volupturaptor.
  • Disney makes female hips very big, anime makes female b**... very big And america makes female waists very big
Hips joke, Disney makes female hips very big, anime makes female b**... very big

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about hips can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of hips puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Comical & Quirky Hips Jokes for a Roaring Good Time

What funny jokes about hips you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean heads jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make hips prank.

How did the hipster burn his tongue?

He bit into his pizza before it was cool.

So I went to my Hipster drug dealer last night...

He gave me an instagram

How much does a hipster weigh?

an instagram

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

(snicker) *You don't know?*

Hipster Jokes!

Why did the hipster float down the tributary?
Because the river was too mainstream.
How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Some obscure number you've never heard of.
Why did the hipster burn his mouth when he ate pizza?
Because he ate it before it was cool.

Why didn't the hipster want to see the Saint John River and the Penobscot River?

They're two Maine streams.

Why did the hipster burn his tongue?

He drank hot chocolate before it was cool.

Why does the hipster make c**... coffee?

The beans are always under-ground.

how many hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb?

it's a pretty obscure number, you probably haven't heard of it.

Why are hipsters such great assassins?

Because they hide the bodies in places no one has ever heard of.

If a hipster falls on the forest, does it make a sound?

Yes...but you've probably never heard it before.

How many hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just some obscure number. You've probably never heard of it.
Actually it only takes one, but he burnt his fingers because he removed he old one before it was cool.

Why won't hipsters listen to the Beatles until Ringo Starr and Paul McCartney die?

Because they only want to listen to the Beatles when they're underground.

Why was the hipster wearing a scarf during the summer?

He liked wearing scarves before it got cool.

Two hipsters walk into a bar.

The first did it before it was cool. The second did it ironically.

Why did the hipster get burned when he drank his coffee?

The barista make a joke about sleeping with his mother.

Two hipsters walked into a bar...

The first went in before it was popular and the second was only being ironic.

A man goes to the doctor...

... and he says, "Doc, I'm not sure what's wrong with me. I can't stop shaking my hips and singing Tom Jones songs."
To which the doctor replies, "Clearly sir, you have Tom Jones' Disease."
The man asks, "Is this common?"
The doctor answers, "It's not unusual."

Hipsters never go white water rafting

It's too main stream.

Why did the hipster drown, when he was iceskating?

He was skating before it was cool

Hipster Caveman

Went clubbing before it was cool.

Why can hipsters listen to Michael Jackson again?

He's been underground for five years now.

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One to do it before it gets cool, and one to talk about how much better the old one used to be.

Why do hipsters only use the microwave?

Because they don't like conventional ovens.

What does the hipster serial killer do?

Has s**... with the bodies before they're cool.

How did the hipster burn his mouth?

He sipped his coffee before it was cool.

Why did the hipster burn his mouth?

He started eating before it was cool.

How did the hipster burn their tongue?

They drank their tea before it was cool.

A hipster coffee shop would be a terrible idea.

Everyone would burn their tongues because they would drink the coffee before it was cool.

How do you get a hipster to take a shower?

Give them a leaky showerhead.
You know, so they can avoid the main stream.

How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change bulbs and 3 to sit around and complain that the original was better.

I saw a hipster walking outside in the cold.

He didn't have a jacket on, so I asked him why.
He said he was outside before it was cool.

What do hipsters use for birth control?

Their personalities

If a hipster falls in the middle of the woods and nobody is around to hear it, does it make a sound?

Yeah, but you've probably never heard it before.

Why is the hipster sweating?

Because he wore a scarf before it was cool.

Why do hipsters love Raiders of the Lost Ark?

Because it's the first Indy movie.

Why do hipsters drink their Jello?

They want to have it before it's cool.

Where do hipsters fish?

I don't know, just not on the main stream.

How do hipsters measure weight?

In Instagrams.

So a Hipster goes into an auto parts store and asks for a fuel cap for his Smart Car.

The sales guy thinks for a moment and says, Yeah, O.K. that is a fair swap.

To be a hipster is to live in constant suffering

You spend all your time in coffee shops, but you always have to drink your coffee before it's cool.

Why did the Hipster order piping hot soup?

He wanted to eat it before it was cool.

Why do hipsters love Harrison Ford?

Because he's Indie!

Hipsters

I had the joy of meeting a couple of hipsters today, and they yelled at me for making fun of them. Apparently the politically correct term is "conjoined twins".

Why don't hipsters live in Alaska?

Everything is cool there already.

Why did the hipster salmon not get to breed?

He didnt use the main stream

What did the hipster say the day after thanksgiving?

I liked the leftovers before they were cool.

My Acceptance Speech

"I would like to thank my arms, for always being by my side. My legs, for always supporting me, as best they could. As for my fingers, well I could always count on them. And finally my hips, for they never lied."

Why do hipsters hate ice skating?

They could never do it before it was cool

Why don't hipsters like rivers?

Too mainstream

How do you get a Michigan girl into an elevator?

How do you get a Michigan girl into an elevator?
Grease her hips, and throw in a t**....

How did the hipster burn his mouth?

He ate pizza before it was cool

Why did the hipsters die of dehydration?

They stayed away from the mainstream.

How many hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb?

It's a really obscure number that you've probably never heard of. I'd explain it but you probably wouldn't get it.

Why do hipsters burn their lips when they drink tea?

Because they drink it before it's cool.

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It's a really obscure number and you've probably never heard of it.

A hipster politician was found dead today of an apparent s**....

He won the popular vote and just couldn't handle it.

What's a hipsters favorite season?

Summer, they like it before it's cool

Why do hipsters love field hockey?

Because it's ice hockey before it gets cool.

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

You wouldn't know, it's *kiiiiind of* an obscure number.

Why did the hipster refuse to undergo surgery?

The anesthesia wasn't local.

Why did the hipster fall into the lake?

He went ice skating before it was cool.

Why did the hipster die in Pripyat?

He went into reactor 4 before it was cool

Why did the hipster burn his tongue?

Because he ate his food before it was cool.

A r**... and a midget get into an accident

The midget gets out of his car, hands on his hips and squeaks angrily, "I am not happy!"
The r**... spits and drawls "so which one are you?"

How many hipsters does it take to fix a heater?

None. They did it before it was cool.

All the hipsters love Steve Jobs

...now that he's underground.

How did the hipster die?

He went ice skating before it was cool

Why did the hipster burn his mouth while drinking coffee?

Because he drank it before it was cool

Why are so many hipsters sweaty?

They put on their winter coats before it's cool.

Hipsters like to do things that nobody else has done.

If only s**... wasn't a thing.

A trucker gets lost one day and as luck would have it, he comes to low bridge and gets stuck under it...cars are backed up for miles behind him....

Eventually, a cop car pulls up, the officer gets out and walks up, laughing hysterically and pointing at the trucker.
He puts his hands on his hips and says with a chuckle, "Got stuck, eh?"
The trucker replies, "No sir, not at all, you see, I was delivering this bridge when I ran out of gas..."

How many hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb?

Ya, it's a really obscure number, it's not used that often, you probably wouldn't know it....

How did the hipster burn his tongue?

He was drinking coffee before it was cool.

Why do hipsters always have to go back home to change into more suitable clothes

Because they went outside before it was cool

What did the hipster say about the Chilean miners?

I liked them so much better when they were underground.

The hipster burnt his tongue

He must've drank his coffee before it was cool

Why did the hipster burn his tongue?

He ate marshmallows before they were cool.

Cop: where are you in the night of the m**...?

Shakira: at my home.
Shakira's Hips: she's at the bar where the m**... take place.
Shakira: son of a--

Why did the hipster girl burn her mouth on the pizza?

Because she wanted to eat it before it was cool.

Beads of sweat were running down her cleavage. Her breathing was hot and heavy.

She moaned as she gained momentum by rocking her hips harder and harder, preparing for the final climactic effort she knew was coming soon. Then, in one final full-body t**..., it was all over, and she breathed a deep sigh of relief and satisfaction. It's always a struggle when the wife gets up off the sofa.

Hips joke, Beads of sweat were running down her cleavage. Her breathing was hot and heavy.

jokes about hips

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these hips jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.