JokoJokes

Hippy Jokes

54 hippy jokes and hilarious hippy puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hippy that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Quick Jump To

Funniest Hippy Short Jokes

Short hippy jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hippy humour may include short hippie jokes also.

  1. What's the difference between a pizza and a hippy chick? You don't peel the crust off the pizza before you eat it
  2. How did the Polygamist Hippie count his wives? 1 Mrs. hippie, 2 Mrs. Hippie, 3 Mrs. Hippie......
  3. How does a polygamist hippie count his wives? One Mrs. Hippie, two Mrs. Hippie, three Mrs. Hippie......
  4. What do you call a clever, socially awkward, bisexual hippie with fancy neckwear who streams Star-Trek? A shy, wry, bi guy in a fly tie and tie dye watching sci-fi on wifi.
    Credits: my bud
  5. Hippies. Had the pleasure to meet a couple of hippies today, and they hooted at me for making fun of them. Apparently the politically correct term was 'conjoined twins'.
  6. How many hippies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Hippies don't screw in lightbulbs...they screw in dirty sleeping bags.
  7. What's the difference between a hockey player and a hippie chick? The hockey player takes a shower after three periods.
  8. I got a new SUV. My hippie friend says to me, "What about the Rainforests? What about the glaciers?" .. I'm like "Man, it's got 4 wheel drive... We can go anywhere you want!"
    -Michael Palascak
  9. Why did the lifeguard fail to rescue the hippie drowning in the ocean? Because he was too far out, man.
  10. What's the difference between a hippie girl and a can of beans? You would still eat the beans after a month in the woods

Share These Hippy Jokes With Friends




Hippy One Liners

Which hippy one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hippy? I can suggest the ones about hobo and bohemian.

  1. What do you call a hippies' wife? Mississippi
  2. Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippy? He was too far-out.
  3. What kind of cigarettes do hippies smoke? Yours.
  4. Why couldn't the life guard save the drowning hippie? He was too far out, man.
  5. What do you call the wife of a hippie? Mississippi.
  6. What does a dirty hippie say after you ask him to get off your couch? Namaste
  7. How can you tell if a hippie has been at your house? He's still there.
  8. What do you get when you cross a hippie with a ninja? Peace and quiet.
  9. Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippy from drowning? Because he was too far out, man.
  10. Why couldn't they save the shipwrecked hippies? They were too far out, man.
  11. Why couldn't the lifeguard at the beach save the hippie? He was too far out
  12. Where do you drown a hippie? In the mainstream (I know it was terrible)
  13. How do you get a hippie off your door step? Pay for the pizza and close the door.
  14. Why do Hippies do so well at University??? They are all about "Higher" education man!!!
  15. How do you know if hippies have been in your house? They are still there.

Hippy joke, How do you know if  hippies have been in your house?

Uproarious Hippy Jokes to Share with Friends

What funny jokes about hippy you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean yogi jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hippy pranks.

Just thought of this

So I was at a hippy music festival and after the show I met a few bands back stage. I saw a bassist sitting in the corner by himself so I sat next to him and asked.
"Hey man, my name is Mark. Whats your name, what you been up to?"
"Benjamin"

Why did the hippy teach the lumberjack calculus?

So he'd use natural logs!

Why did the Hippy Drown?

he was tooooo faaaaaaar oouuuuutttt maaaaaannnn

What's brown and black and looks good on a hippy?

A rottweiller.

What did the hippy say when I told him to get off my couch?

Namaste

What did the physicist say to the depressed hippy?

"There's no such thing as negative energy"

What do you call a morbidly obese hippy?

Tie Dyeabetes

What do you call a promiscuous hippy?

w**...-ganic

Why did the lifeguard have to rescue the hippy at the beach?

Beacause he was too "faaaaarrrrr oooouuuuttt, maaaaan!"

Did you hear about the hippy scientist?

He only did organic chemistry

A hippie is walking along

A Hippy is walking along wearing one shoe. Another hippy sees him and calls out,
'Hey man, you lose a shoe?'
"Nope, found one"

What does a hippy tell you when you ask them to leave?

Namaste

What's a hippy mothers least favorite sport?

Formula one!

Hippy walks into a bar

The barman says "Sorry, we don't serve free spirits"

How do you know when a hippy chick is on the rag?

She's only wearing one sock.

What's it called when a hippy hangs himself?

Tie-die

What does a hippy say when you tell him to get off your couch?

Namaste

Why are hippy drum circles like high frequency radiation?

They both cause the formation of free radicals.

What's the hippy forecast?

Slight chance of a shower on sunday...

What did one smelly hippy say to the other after they found some clean clothes?

You've changed

What is the difference between a hippy chick and a hockey player? (1 of 3 hippy jokes)

A hockey player usually showers after 3 periods

I asked a hippy if he wanted to leave the party we were at. Know what he told me?

Nah, imma stay.
(Works better if you read it aloud)

What did the hippy say to his gay lover?

That was deep man, real deep.

What is the difference between a vegan on a diet and a flower child?

One's a very thin person, and the other is a little hippy.

What do you call the ghost of a really awesome hippy?

Super-natural

What does a hippy say when he doesn't leave?

Namaste. —nah Ima stay

What do you call a man with no legs?

A hippy.

Why did the hippy drink the b**... water?

So he could get highdrated

Why did the coal mine foreman fire the hippy who showed up for work wearing this outasight tie die shirt?

Outasight, out of mine.

What's red and orange and looks good on a hippy?

Fire.
What's the difference between a trampoline and a hippy?
You t**... Doc Marten's before jumping up and down on a trampoline.

Why did the hippy drown

He was too far out.

Why didnt the lifeguard save the drowning hippy?

Because he was to far out man

A hippy finds a magic lamp.

He rubs it and a genie comes out and asks "What is your wish?" The hippy says "Man, I just want to be up tight, out of sight, and in the groove." So the genie turns him into a t**....

What did the hippy and the conservitave protester have in common ?

They both need haircuts.

Met a hippy girl tonight and she asked me what my sign was

I told her this was a sign and I got the h**... out of there

God the Father, the Son, and Holy Spirit are going on vacation...

God the Father says "Let's vacation in Israel".
God the Son, Jesus, says "Too many bad memories there. Let's vacation in Berkeley."
God the Father says "I'm not into the Mother God, hippy v**...."
The Holy Spirit says "I know, let's go to Rome and visit The Vatican"
God the Father and Son ask - "Why?"
The Holy Spirit shrugs and replies "I've just never been there."

Hippy joke, God the Father, the Son, and Holy Spirit are going on vacation...

jokes about hippy