Hippopotamus Jokes
44 hippopotamus jokes and hilarious hippopotamus puns to laugh out loud. Read animal jokes about hippopotamus that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Hippopotamus Short Jokes
Short hippopotamus jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hippopotamus humour may include short hip hop jokes also.
- What do you call a cross between a hippopotamus and something that is not a moose? A hipponotamoose.
- Why didn't the elephant make a fat joke about the hippopotamus Because it would be hippo-critical.
- Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus? Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus, or just a really cool Opotamus?
- Hippopotamuses are seemingly unconcerned about the effects of climate change on their habitat It's as if they lived in de Nile
- African conservationists call for the ban on hunting hippopotamus to be lifted, citing environmental concerns. To me the whole thing seems so hippocritical.
- Hippo cruelty I don't know what to say, the song "I want a Hippopotamus for Christmas..." makes me wanna cry hippo cruelty, why only the poor hippo, why? why?
- What did the hippopotamus say to the alligator, who kept picking on her without examining his own actions? Stop being so hyppo-critical.
- What do you call a hippopotamus with an STD? A herpepotamus.
- WHY DID THE HIPPOPOTAMUS NEED HIS VENTILIN? BECAUSE HE WAS HIPPOVENTILATING!
- What do you call a hippopotamus wearing Tie Dye? ...
A hippiepotamus
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Hippopotamus One Liners
Which hippopotamus one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hippopotamus? I can suggest the ones about hippy and platypus.
- Why did the mathematician lie adjacent to the hippopotamus? Cos
- From my son: What did the hippopotamus do to the magician? He hippo-tized him!
- Why can you always trust a hippopotamus? Because hips don't lie.
- What do you call a PETA member that shoots a hippopotamus in the head? A hippo-crit.
- How does George Takei say the plural of hippopotamus? Hippopot oh my
- What do you call a hippopotamus that raps? A hiphopotamus
- How do you make a hippopotamus float? 2 hippos and a LOT of root beer.
- TIL about the hyperactive hippopotamus with hypoglycemia The hyper-hypo hippo.
- A Haiku Haikus are simple
But sometimes, they won't make sense
Hippopotamus - Why did the mathematician lay adjacent to the hippopotamus? Cos
- What do you call a pacifist hippopotamus gang member? A hippo-crip.
- What do you call a hippopotamus with a broken leg? A Lame-o
- What do you call a hippopotamus that's a gigalo? A hit-the-spotimus.
- What do you call a hippopotamus with no "i"? A pirate.
- What do you call a hippopotamus in an I.C.U.? Hippo-critical.
Laughter Hippopotamus Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity
What funny jokes about hippopotamus you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean antelope jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hippopotamus pranks.
So, a stutterer was a wedding
He stand's up and says:
-hip, hip
And then everyone on the wedding party said with their glasses raised:
-HURRAY
The stutterer, tried again, but louder
-HIP!! HIP!!
Everyone raised their glasses again and shouted out of their lungs!
-HUURRAAAAY!!!!!
The stutterer, again, yelled with both arms raised!!
-HIIPPPP !! HIPPP!!!
Everyone on the party became one, all the happiness expressed with one single shout!
-HURRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!
But then, everyone was killed by a herd of ~~hippopotamus~~ Hippopotamuses
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
At a medical conference
Two African doctors were in an intense debate. The first said "It's wooooooooooooooommmbbbbb". The second said "no, it's woooooooooooooooommmbbaaaa." A British doctor overhears them and decides to help: "I think the word you are looking for is 'womb.'"
They both turn to him and say "Clearly, you've never heard a hippopotamus f**... underwater!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a ironic judgmental hippopotamus?
Hippo-critic.
(Lol this s**... but I just thought of it)
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you get when you cross a lesbian with a hippopotamus?
A lickalottapuss.
Three squirrels were sitting on animal hides...
The first squirrel was sitting on a rabbit hide and weighed one pound. The second squirrel was sitting on a wolf hide and weighed two pounds. And the third squirrel was sitting on a hippopotamus hide and weighed three pounds. This proves that the squirrel on the hippopotamus is equal to the sum of the squirrels on the other two hides.
Name an animal that lives in water
Teacher: Name an animal that lives in water?
Kelvin: Hippopotamus
Teacher: Amos, you're next
Amos: Hippopokelvin
Teacher: Whats that?
Amos: Kelvin started it 😒😒😒
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My friend always says how he loves hippopotamuses, but he just made fun of a herd of them....
Why is he so hippocritical?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a gay hippopotamus?
A homopotamus.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two doctors are talking in a gynecology ward.
One of them says to the other, "I think it's spelled W-O-O-M. Woom."
The second on says, "No, I'm sure it's W-H-O-O-M. Whoom."
The first says, "Actually, I think it's "W-O-O-O-H-M. WOOOHM."
A nurse peers around the corner and says, "Excuse me, it's actually spelled W-O-M-B. w**...." She then walks away, appalled at these men who call themselves doctors.
Then the first doctor looks at the second and tells him, "She's probably never even seen a hippopotamus, let alone heard it f**...."
