Hillbilly Jokes
85 hillbilly jokes and hilarious hillbilly puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hillbilly that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Hillbilly Short Jokes
Short hillbilly jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hillbilly humour may include short billy kid jokes also.
- In America you call people who marry their cousins hillbillys In Europe we call them Royals
Share These Hillbilly Jokes With Friends
Hillbilly One Liners
Which hillbilly one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hillbilly? I can suggest the ones about little billy and country girl.
- What did the deity say when it came back as a hill-billy? "What incarnation?!?"
- Why do hillbillys like to use dull knives? theyre not very sharp
- A hobo and a goat are hiking up a small mountain. Who is the hill-billy?
- What is it called when you die and come back as a h**...? Reintarnation
- What do you call the moisture between two h**... having s**...? Relative humidity.
- There's a movie coming out soon about h**...... I can't wait to see the trailer.
- How did the h**... find his sister in the woods? Pretty Hot
- What do a t**... and h**... have in common? They both like to throw a hoedown.
- What do you get when you cross a h**... and a m**... suspect? A person of i**....
- What do hillbillys do during halloween ? They Pumpkin
- Yeast is a lot like a h**.... It's in bread
- Why do h**... like sandwiches? They're in bread
- How did the h**... find his cousin in the woods? Pretty good.
- What do you call a h**... who owns sheep and goats. Bisexual.
- How do h**... gourds reproduce? They pump kin.
Fun-Filled Hillbilly Jokes to Make You and Your Friends Chuckle & Giggle
What funny jokes about hillbilly you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean hank hill jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hillbilly pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why don't h**... ever try reverse c**...?
Because you don't turn your back on family.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
There are two kinds of h**... women. Those who get married and have a lot of kids....
....and those who are a single and have a lot of kids.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I just thought up an original joke today, hopefully you all like it...Why is wheat a h**... grain?
because its inbread
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you hear about the h**... yeast?
It was in bread.....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A plane from J.F.K. is coming in to land at a rural airport in Arkansas at midnight.
Mouthy pilot turns to his co-pilot, winks & says "watch this"......
"Pilot to control tower......hey there h**..., guess who!!"
Control tower switches off the airport lights.....
"Control tower to pilot....... Hey there Yankee, guess *where!!*"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why are even the best forensic teams unable to catch h**... criminals?
Because they all share the same DNA and there are no dental records.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How do you know when you're staying in a h**... hotel?
When you call the front desk and say, "I gotta leak in my sink,"
and the clerk replies, "okay, Go ahead."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the h**... sue her estranged brother?
He wasn't paying child support.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What did the h**... say to his sister after she asked him to have s**... with her?
If you i**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you hear about the h**... who was called to testify in court?
When he spoke you could only see the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Someone explain this joke to me?
A nice young h**... couple decided to get married. Their parents wanted to give them the best wedding ever, so they reserved the nicest hotel in town. Everything was perfect. After the wedding the newlyweds went to the front desk to check in. The desk clerk asked,"Bridal" and the new husband said "Na, I'll just hold her by the ears till she gets used to it".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why is Halloween a h**...'s favorite holiday?
Because they like to pumpkin.
I'll see myself out...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
This Joke is a Bit of a Stretch
What did the h**... say when his yoga instructor asked if you wanted to leave the class?
"Na, I'm a-stay"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
r**... Geometry
Dale was the first of his h**... family to make it past the second grade.
One day, Dale's pa asked, "What did y'all learn today in that geometry class?"
Dale replied, "Pi r squared".
"Dadgummit!", yelled Dale's pa, "I knew that there fancy school tweren't no good! Pie are ROUND! CAKE are square!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The difference between a prince and a h**... is...
...one sleeps with a canopy over his bed, while the other sleeps with a can o' pee under his bed.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two h**... got married.
On their wedding night, the h**... groom admitted that he was a v**... and didn't really know what to do.
The h**... bride, who was much experienced, just giggled and said, "Silly, you just take that thing you play with and put it where I pee." So he got up, grabbed his banjo and threw it in the sink.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A h**... tells his parents he won't marry his fiance because she is a v**....
"If she isn't good enough for her own family, then she isn't good enough for ours!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do some goats scream like humans?
They evolved this way to have a h**... r**... alarm.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many h**... does it take to screw in a light bulb?
2.
A man, his wife, and his cousin
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A h**... invites his new neighbor to a party...
he says "there'll be a whole lotta drinkin', dancin', and screwin'..."
His neighbor asks if he can bring anything.
h**... says, "you can bring anything you want, just goin' be me and you..."
*credit to "Mad Men"*
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What is the difference between a h**... and a Pinhead?
Pinheads do not get round 'tuit's and Hillbillys poke their eye out with them.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between America and Europe?
In America, we call our i**... h**....
In Europe, they call them royals.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What does a h**... say when they recognize a place by scent?
I nose this place
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A black man, a Mexican, a Muslim and a h**... are all playing Russian Roulette together. Who is guaranteed to win?
Society.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do a h**... and a nepotist blackberry executive have in common?
They both give their relatives rim jobs.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two h**... sisters are fighting about who is better
They ask their dad.
"Daddy who's your favorite daughter?"
The father looks at both of them, "Your mother."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Since married famous people often mix names, shouldn't Hillary and Bill's be...
h**...?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a h**... giraffe that lives in a trailer and drinks beer all day?
A rednnnnnneeeeeeeccccccccckkkkkk.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Whats the difference between a hillybilly family reunion and a h**... f**...?
At the f**..., there's DEFINITELY o**... not enjoying the s**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do h**... and yeast have in common?
They're both in bred
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I went to a hypnotherapist who said that, while I was under hypnosis, she discovered I was a h**... in a past life.
Apparently it's called "reintarnation".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do h**... brothers and sisters marry each other?
Cause Pa ain't pay'n fer 2 weddins!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a h**... rapper?
xxxtarnation
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
h**... have been outcasted to Zimbabwe
It's now called Jimbobway.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a h**... baker?
A breadneck.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a h**... after he is all grown up?
A mountain goat of course!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What to you call a room full of h**...?
A full set of teeth
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between a h**... family reunion and a o**...
One is with the lights on and the other is with the lights off
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do h**... have such dirty elbows?
because you cant lick yourself there
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the best part about getting married when you're a h**...?
You only have to send invitations to one family.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Where do h**... like to hang out during the summer?
The shallow end of the gene pool.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do h**... siblings give each other kisses?
Because they're a little hickey.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why are h**... men not circumcised?
Because they need somewhere to carry their chew.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do 24 h**... have in common?
One complete set of teeth
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two h**... are discussing plans for dinner
After throwing ideas back and forth of what to cook, their eyes catch some roadkill on the side of the road. One of them eagerly suggests, "how about Himalayan Woodchuck?"
"Himalayan Woodchuck?" the other h**... scoffed. "What in the devil is that?"
"You know," the other says, gesturing towards the corpse, "because we found Himalayan on the side of the road."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do h**...'s have missing teeth?
Their dentist is Dr.Pepper.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I'm not trying to sound political and all but
h**... is short for Hilliam William
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
John gave his h**... cousin Billy a phonecard. "You can make calls with this ." John then went to get a drink.
In the corner of his eye, he noticed Billy whispering frantically into the card: "Hello? Hello? Can you hear me?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between a r**... and a h**...?
A r**... will kill you but a h**... will keep you
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's long and hard on a h**...?
second grade.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two h**... were sipping shine on the front porch
When a truck went passed loaded up with rolls of sod.
I'm a-gonna do that when I win that there lottery announced h**... #1.
Do wuuuut? Asked h**... #2.
Send my lawn out to git mowed.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do h**... call their relatives from past generations?
Their incestors
Came up with it myself. How did I do?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
This 4th of July it's important to remember that calling all Americans "Yanks" is a racist stereotype.
We have r**... and h**... too!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I finally convinced my h**... friend to get a Covid vaccination, but he doesn't want Moderna.
He says, just because she sang some good pop songs back in the 80s don't mean she knows how to make a vaccine! .
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a fancy h**...?
A Hill William.
