High Altitude Jokes
8 high altitude jokes and hilarious high altitude puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about high altitude that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Hilarious High Altitude Jokes to Make Your Friends Roar with Laughter
What is a good high altitude joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
I got fired for being high on the job.
Boss said he didn't like my altitude.
Gliding Eagles
Two eagles were gliding at a high altitude and discussing life, when a F-15 fighter jet zooms above them. It throws them off course and ruffles up their feathers.
They calm down and get back on track gliding next to each other.
The first eagle, excitedly 'Wow!! Now thats what I call speed!!'
The second eagle, calmly replies 'Trust me. You would be flying that fast too if your sphincter was on fire.'
My boss told me I've got to stop coming to work high...
...and that I need to change my altitude.
What do you call a sunburnt guy on high altitude?
Moun-tan
What do you call bomber version of Snoop Dog?
B-52 (High Altitude Bomber)
Yoda is piloting a 747...
Radio tower: Flight 90 you seem to be veering away from your designated flight path. Stay on course. Over.
Yoda: Instrument panels, working not.
Radio tower: Flight 90, stay on course. Is everything okay? Over.
Yoda: Too many clouds, there are.
Radio tower: Flight 90. Maintain a high altitude. Stop descending.
Yoda: Hydraulics, working not.
Radio tower: *static crackling* Flight 90 I'm having trouble *static crackling* reading you on the radar *static crackling* Are you on course?
Yoda: Of course I am
*static crackling*
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Chemistry Puns
What do you do with a dying chemist? If you can't helium, you might as well barium. That joke was quite the knee-s**..., wasn't it. I certainly slapped my neon that one. It was just so-dium funny. Why do chemists like high altitudes? The views arsenic. If you're not laughing yet, don't worry. I'm only through with hafnium. Come on, I think ironed some laughter for that one. Where do chemists wash their dishes? In the zinc. I'm sorry if you didn't like that one. I'm no einsteinium. I would tell you another one, but I think they all argon.
How do you gain altitude while heading down?
Join the mile high club
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