Hiding Jokes
126 hiding jokes and hilarious hiding puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hiding that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article explores the playful art of hiding jokes behind other objects. Learn why people choose to hide jokes and how they can be concealed, from an elephant hiding behind a tree to a joke hidden in an attic, and the different interpretations these strategies can offer.
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Funniest Hiding Short Jokes
Short hiding jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hiding humour may include short hides jokes also.
- Joke from my 12 year old why do you never see elephants hiding in tree? Because they're so good at it!
Please don't ban me - My wife found out i was cheating on her after she found all the letters I was hiding... She got so mad and said she's never gonna play scrabble with me ever again
- To the man in the wheelchair that stole my camouflage jacket... You can hide, but you can't run.
- Where is the worst place to hide if you are having a game of hide and seek in a hospital ? The ICU
- Sometimes I hide my wife's inhaler.... The neighbours think I am a stud when they hear her panting heavily "give it to me!"
- My 9 year old son has started asking awkward questions about the human body... I suppose the freezer wasn't the best place to hide it.
- What's a stalker and a Pokemon nerd got in common? They both hide in the bushes trying to get a Pikachu.
- My dad and I play hide and seek a lot to beat each other's record. My record is 2 hours until he found me. His record is 20 years and still counting.
- Why is leather armour better for sneaking than steel armour? Leather armour is made of hide.
- My wife found out I was cheating My wife found out I was cheating on her after she found all the letters I was hiding…
She got mad and said she is never playing Scrabble with me ever again!!
Share These Hiding Jokes With Friends
Hiding One Liners
Which hiding one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hiding? I can suggest the ones about conceal and hide and seek.
- To the man in the wheelchair that stole my camo jacket You can hide but you can't run
- Leather armor is the best for sneaking because it's literally made of hide.
- TIFU by hiding in poison oak Whoops, wrong shrub
- Why does leather armour help the wearer be stealthy? Because it's made of hide.
- Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They are really good at it.
- Why does leather armor make you better at sneaking? Because it's made of hide.
- Do you suffer from anxiety that an intruder may be hiding in your room? You're not alone.
- Where is the worst place to hide in a hospital? In the ICU.
- Why is leather armor the best for being stealthy? It's made of hide.
- Why is it best to wear leather when sneaking around? It's made of hide
- Where do you hide after killing a black person? behind a badge
- Why do you never play hide & seek with mountains? Mountains peak.
- To the handicapped guy who stole my bag You can hide but you can't run
- Why don't orphans play hide and seek? Because no one will look for them.
- Why is Kevin Spacey bad at hide and seek? He comes out at the wrong time.
Hiding Behind Jokes
Here is a list of funny hiding behind jokes and even better hiding behind puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- how do you catch a rabbit? Hide behind a bush and make a noise like a carrot.
- Where is the best place to hide after killing someone? Behind a badge..
- Yo Mama so fat, You can hide behind her back and still be visible... Because of Gravitational Lensing.
- Where's the safest place to hide after shooting someone? Behind your badge.
- Why do you never see an elephant hiding behind a tree? Because they're very good at it
- Wheres the best place to hide after shooting a black guy? behind a badge
- Where do you hide when you kill a black guy? Behind a badge
- In a dangerous situation, I'd always put my children first. I do this because I have a crippling habit of hiding behind my mistakes.
- Where do you hide if you kill a black man? Behind a badge.
- How do you catch a rabbit? Hide behind a tree and make carrot sounds.
Elephant Hiding Jokes
Here is a list of funny elephant hiding jokes and even better elephant hiding puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- How do you hide an elephant in a strawberry patch? Paint it's toenails red.
Don't believe me? Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch? - Know why you've never seen an elephant hiding in a tree? Because they're good at it
- Why don't you ever see elephants hiding in trees? After reading this reposted joke everyday, the elephants realized their hiding spot was discovered, and found a new one.
- Have you ever seen an elephant hiding in a tree? Good hiders, aren't they?
- How come we never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they're REALLY good at it
- hy haven't you ever seen any elephants hiding up trees? Because they're really, really good at it.
- Why do elephants paint their toenails red? So that they can hide in cherry trees.
Ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree?
Good hiding spot, huh? - Why don't you ever see elephants hiding in a forest. Because they're good at it.
- Why have you never seen an elephant hiding in a tree? Cause they are so good at it
- Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they're so good at it


Experience Good Cheer with Hilarious Hiding Jokes and Friends
What funny jokes about hiding you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean hide behind jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hiding pranks.
I've never understood how the n**... couldn't find where Anne Frank was hiding
I've been to Amsterdam... There are signs pointing to her house everywhere.
Her: Wow, you know all the right moves in bed. How's about a second go but this time lose the hat
Ratatouille's Remy hiding in my hair: Tell her your head is cold
A man went to confession.
"Forgive me, father", he cried. "During WWII I had someone in hiding in my attic."
"Well, that is not a sin?" Said the priest
"No, I know that," said the man, "but I made him pay rent."
"That is not proper, but your life was at risk, so you are forgiven."
"Thank you, father. But could I ask you another question?"
"Of course, my son."
"Do you think that I should tell him that the war is over?"
FBI Investigation.
The phone rings at the FBI headquarters.
"Hello? I'm calling to report my neighbor, Clifford. He is hiding m**... inside his firewood!"
"Thank you very much for the call, Sir."
The next day, FBI agents descend on the neighbor's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes the they bust open every piece of wood, but finds no m**.... They swear at the neighbors and leave. The phone rings at the neighbors house.
"Hey Clifford, did the FBI come?"
"Yep"
"Did they chop the wood?"
"Yep"
"Great, now it's your turn to call. i need my garden plowed."
Why is six afraid of seven?
Six hasn't been the same since he came back from Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he sees Charlie hiding in the darkness, dead bodies hanging in the canopy, and remembers the smell of blood and gunpowder.
When he sees seven, he is reminded of those days.
Did you hear about the guy who was caught hiding i**... immigrants in Prague?
He got prison for caching false Czechs.
A Blonde A Brunette and A Redhead trespassed onto a farm
later a farmer came to chase them out so they all went hiding in the barnyard. The redhead hid with the pigs and said "oink" "oink", the brunette hid with the cows and said "moo" moo", and the blonde hid under a potato sack and said "potato" potato"
Cow jokes that had to be shared
-Why is there a high gang rate amongst cows? They've all got beef.
-Why was the cow a terrible sharpshooter? All he did was graze.
-How can you tell if there are cows hiding near by? You can hear them uttering to each other.
.....thank you
A physicist, a biologist and a statistician go hunting.
They are hiding together in the bushes and they see a deer 70ft ahead of them. The physicist makes some calculations, aims and fires at the deer. His shot ends up 5ft to the left of the deer. The biologist analyzes the deer's movement, aims and fires. His shot ends up 5ft to the right of the deer. The statistician drops his rifle and happily shouts, "WE GOT IT!!"
On a scale of 1 to o**......
How good was the hiding spot?
(real news) In Virginia, a man stole a samurai sword from a store by hiding it in his pants.
He later denied having the sword, telling police he *was* just glad to see them.
What do you call an amphibian in hiding?
Incognitoad.
Who said r**... aren't real smart?
"Hello, is this here the Sheriff's Office?"
"Yes. What can I do for you?"
"I'm calling to report my neighbor, Virgil Smith. He's drillin' holes in his farwood and hiding m**... inside!"
"Thank you very much for the call, sir."
The next day, the Sheriff & his deputies descend on Virgil's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept.
Using axes, they split every piece of wood, but find no m**.... They sneer at Virgil and leave.
The phone rings at Virgil's house. "Hey, Virgil! This here is Floyd. Did the Sheriff come?"
"Yeah!"
"Did they split yer farwood?"
"Yep!"
"Happy Birthday, buddy!"
Son, who is that German guy who keeps hiding things in our house?
Alzheimer, granpa.
Einstein, Newton & Pascal are playing hide and seek
Einstein starts counting "1...2...3..." and Pascal immediately runs away to hide. Instead of hiding Newton knees down and draws a square of one meter side length. Then he steps inside of it. Einstein finishes counting and turns around. He instantly yells "Newton I have found you!" But Newton replies: "No, what you see is one Newton over one square meter - so what you have found is one Pascal."
What's the name of that German guy that keeps hiding my stuff around the house?
Alzheimer, Grandma.
A mother skunk had two kids that she named In and Out.
A mother skunk had two kids that she named In and Out. Whenever In was in, Out was out. And whenever In was out, Out was in.
One day Out was in but she couldn't find In anywhere. She looked everywhere for In; up, down, left, right, but she could not find In. Finally she asked Out to find In, and Out went right to where In was hiding. When the mother skunk asked Out how he knew where to find In, he replied
"Easy. Instinct."
How do you starve a worthless mooch?
By hiding his employment check in his work boots.
What's it called when you're killing time at work hiding in the bathroom?
Stalling.
A missing Chinese pyromaniac has been located hiding out at a Roman Catholic monastery.
He was found praying with friars.
Have you ever been caught m**... in a closet?
Them: No.
You: It's a really good hiding spot isn't it.....
Multijokes: How many Jews can you fit in a family car.
Standard Answ**e**r: Three in the back, two in the front and six-million in the ashtray.
Follow-Up Answ**e**r: Three in the back, two in the front and none anywhere else because the Holocaust never happened.
Alternate Answ**e**r: Three in the back, two in the front and a family of eight hiding under the roof-rack.
Efficient Answ**e**r: Not enough, we'll need to use trains.
Anti-Joke Answ**e**r: Please tell me, myself and some Jewish friends are going to Florida but ~~cannot afford~~ are too-cheap for plane tickets.
Racist Answ**e**r: Throw a dollar in there and they'll all get in.
My ex-girlfriend says she has a stalker. I have to say I'm surprised.
In all the time I've spent hanging around her house, hiding in the bushes, watching her come and go...I've never seen any signs of a stalker.
Physics Joke
Einstein, Newton, and Pascal are all hanging out and bored so they decide to play hide and go seek. Einstein decides to count first, and as they are counting Pascal leaves to hide in a bush. Newton on the other hand draws a box under himself and just stands there. When Einstein is done counting he walks up to Newton and is like,"Newton, you're not even hiding". Newton then says,"Ah, but you found Newtons over meters squared! You found a Pascal!!".
If a black guy is in hiding
He has gone incog-n**....
h**... walked in to a bar...
The bartenders says "whoa, h**... I thought you were dead"
h**... says "no, just hiding. I'm planning to kill the rest of the Jews and 5 clowns"
The bartender asks "why the clowns?"
h**... says "see no one cares about Jews"
Where was Saddam Hussein found hiding?
Between Iraq and a hard place.
My wife found out I was cheating on her after she found all the letters I was hiding. She kicked over the table, stormed out of the room and shouted that she's never...
...playing Scrabble with me again.
Why don't you ever see a hippopotamus hiding in the trees?
*Because they're really good at it.*
2 guys are hiding a bomb under a car.
Guy 1 - What if the bomb goes off while we're still under the car.
Guy 2 - Don't worry, I've got a second one in my backpack.
What do you call a pig in hiding?
Inhognito.
My parents read the book I was writing. They said the man character wasn't likeable...
So, yeah, now I have a new hiding place for my diary.
Hiding an e**... isn't as easy as you may think...
It's harder than it looks...
Why did the squirrel judge the drag queen competition?
He is an expert at hiding nuts.
An old man asks his grandson "What was that German who keeps hiding my stuff called?"
The grandson replies "Alzheimer".
One day , the scientists decided to play hide and seek. When the seeker started to count , everybody but Newton went hiding. Newton drew a square 1m each side right behind the seeker and stepped into it. The seeker found him immediately and declared "Newton, Newton". But Newton refused to lose.
He said: This square covered an area of 1m2. I'm a Newton on 1m2. So I'm Pascal.
My gf said she was being spyed on by a creepy guy she dont know
I've started choosing better hiding spots.
CoVid-19 is making the world a prettier place.
I mean, the ugly people are still there, but the mask does a great job of hiding it.
Why does no one ever see hippos hiding in a tree?
Because they're so good at it
To all the people who are afraid that someone might be hiding under their bed:
YOU ARE NOT ALONE
My wife found I was cheating when she saw the letters I was hiding
After that she refuses to play Scrabble with me ever again
Newton, Einstein and Pascal meet in Heaven.
They're bored, so Einstein suggests they play hide and seek. Einstein starts counting to 10. Pascal runs to find a good hiding spot, Newton on the other hand stays in place. He draws a 1 meter by 1 meter square with chalk on the ground and stands in it. Einstein finished counting, turns around, notices Newton and says: Ha, gotcha Newton! , but Newton just replies: Nah man, you got Pascal.
I s**... identify as a Lootbox
I won't tell you what I'm hiding, it costs too much to open me up, and once you do it's probably not going to be what you want
My wife found out I was cheating on her after she found all the letters I was hiding...
She got mad and said she's never playing scrabble with me again.
I once met a T-rex who was working at a casino.
He said he was hiding out from the cops.
I think he was a small arms dealer.
What do you call a man hiding in the bushes?
Russell........
Why do you never see hippos hiding in trees
Because they're very good at it.
One patient fell into a coma
One patient fell into a coma for 2 years while hiding.
He got atrophy.
Somebody asked why I was hiding at work?
Because a good employee is always hard to find
Why are leopards so bad at hiding?
No matter where they hide, they're always spotted
Two mentos are in a bar...
...just enjoying a drink of coke, (as they do of course.)
Then a Halls Cough Drop walks in.
One of the mentos hides under the table. Shaking.
The other one asks him "What's up?"
The mentos hiding under the table replies "You don't wanna mess with him... "
"...he's F--K!NG MENTHAL!"
"
Ophelia: "Babe, come over."
Hamlet: "I can't. I'm hiding a body."
Ophelia: "My dad's not home."
Hamlet: "I know."
What does the Easter Bunny listen to while hiding eggs?
Hip hop.
A man thought he was a worm.
A man thought he was a worm. And thus he was afraid of chickens, because, well, chickens eat worms. Obviously.
So he went into therapy. After 6 months the therapist managed to convince him that he no longer was a worm.
And as a final test, he needed to face chickens. Upon seeing the chickens he got scared and hid himself from the chickens.
Upon seeing this his therapist asked "Why are you hiding from the chickens, are you still thinking you are a worm?"
The man replied "No I know I'm not a worm. But do the chickens know?"
I'm hiding in my Finnish Neighbours shed, waiting to jump out and surprise him.
It's like a sauna in here.
When I was younger, I didn't want to imagine my parents having s**......
So I'd watch them while hiding in their bedroom closet.
A man went to confession (again)
"Forgive me, father", he said. "During WWII I had someone in hiding in my attic."
"Well, that is not a sin," said the priest
"No, I know that," said the man, "but I made him pay rent."
"That is not at all proper, but your lives were at risk, so you are forgiven."
"Thank you, father. But may I ask you another question?"
"Of course you can."
"Do you think that I should tell him that the war is over?"
I was walking in a cemetery this morning and saw a bloke hiding behind a gravestone. I said, "Morning."
He replied, "No, just having a s**...."
I woke up last night from a noise somewhere in the house.
My wife turned to me and whispered "It must be a thief. Go downstairs and check."
Reluctantly, i went downstairs. I checked every room but couldn't find the thief.
I knew this sneaky guy was hiding somewhere but where?
Then i remembered- i don't have a wife.
Here's a trilogy of jokes
You know why you never see an elephant hiding in a tree?
Because they are good at it.
Why do elephants paint their b**... red?
So they can hide in cherry trees.
What's the loudest sound in the forest?
Giraffes eating cherries
Why don't you see elephants hiding in a tree?
Because they're very good at it.
Why do the elephants paint their b**... red?
So they can hide in a cherry tree.
What's the loudest sound in the jungle?
Giraffes eating cherries.
How come you never see a Rhinoceros hiding in a tree?
Because they are really good at it.
My wife recently discovered I was cheating after she found all those letters I'd been hiding.
She got really mad and said she's never going to play Scrabble with me again.
My wife found out I was cheating after she found the letters I was hiding.
She got mad and said she's never playing Scrabble with me again
A man is sitting at home…
when he hears a knock at his door. He opens the door and there's no one there- cranes his neck to look and see if anyone is hiding he looks left and right- nothing.
As he's about to close the door- he looks down and sees a snail. He shrugs his shoulders and flicks the snail across his yard.
2 years go by
The same man is at home and there's a knock at the door.
He opens the door and a snail says, Hey! Whatcha do that for?
A man was recently arrested after being found hiding in a wardrobe.
When the police asked him what he was doing there, he said 'Narnia business'.
You know why a leopard are bad at hiding?
Because they're always spotted.
What do you call a man hiding in a pile of leaves?
Russell.
Today in my biology lesson, my teacher told us that all big cats hunted by hiding, except leapords.
When I asked her why, she said, "Well, because they're always spotted."
A pirate walks into a bar
I pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel where his hat should be, hanging down covering part of his face. The bartender asked if he was hiding his face for a reason.
"Aye," the pirate said. "I have a bounty on me head."
A series of jokes because I never see the full set
Why are elephants so good at hiding in trees?
Because you never see them.
How do they hide in cherry trees?
They paint their b**... red and climb up
What's the loudest sound in the Savannah?
A giraffe eating cherries.

