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Hey Baby Jokes

117 hey baby jokes and hilarious hey baby puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hey baby that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Hey Baby Short Jokes

Short hey baby jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hey baby humour may include short hey dude jokes also.

  1. I called my wife's phone using my best friend's phone. She answered with "Hey baby"... She knew it was me before I even spoke. True love at it's finest.
  2. Hey baby, are you an introductory credit card offer? Because your terms are hard to understand and you keep saying you have no interest.
  3. What is the mathematician's favorite pick-up line? Hey baby, wanna see the exponential growth of my natural log?
  4. My toddler tried out and age aproporiate pickup line "Hey baby, you've got some fiiiiiiine motor skills."
  5. Nerdy pickup line Hey baby, are you a compressed file format, because rar.
    ^^^^^now ^^^^^where ^^^^^did ^^^^^I ^^^^^put ^^^^^the ^^^^^bleach...
  6. Hope y'all like! A guy walks up to a girl and says "Hey baby, I'm a pescatarian."
    She says "that's the worst pickup line I've ever heard."
    So he says "whatever, there's plenty of fish in the sea."
  7. My wife and I are expecting a child and I hope someone grabs her arm in public to talk about the baby. That way I can say, "Hey! Leggo of my preggo!"
  8. I walked up to a woman in a bar and said hey, baby, if you were a fruit you'd be a fine-apple. She responded and if you were a fruit, women would rejoice.
  9. Hey baby, have you got a time machine? Cuz' I could go back in time to approach you with a better pickup line than this one
  10. I'm going to try a new pickup line when I'm traveling in a red state: Hey baby, want to see my vasectomy scar?

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Hey Baby One Liners

Which hey baby one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hey baby? I can suggest the ones about hey mom and mean baby.

  1. Hey baby, are you a GPU? Cause I wanna make you mine.
  2. Hey baby are you a Communist? Because i can feel an uprising in my lower class.
  3. Hey girl, are you a parked car in July? Because I want to leave a baby in you.
  4. Hey baby are you my GPA? Because you look like you'd disappoint my parents.
  5. Hey baby, call me Colgate Because 9 out of 10 dentists recommend me in your mouth.
  6. What is Dracula's favorite pick-up line? Hey baby, nice jugulars.
  7. Hey baby, is that a gun in my pocket? Get in the van.
  8. Hey baby, did you drop from heaven? Because it looks like you fell face first
  9. Hey baby, are you a C major scale? 'Cause you look all natural to me.
  10. Hey baby, are you a cloud server? Because I have something to upload from my hard drive.
  11. Hey baby, can I take your derivative.... So I can lay tangent to those curves.
  12. Hey baby do you shop at Aldi? Cause you'll love Aldi's nuts.
  13. Hey baby did you get your pants on sale? Because in my house they're 100% off.
  14. Hey baby, is your name Polio? Because I am stiff below the waist
  15. Hey baby, if I were a gorilla exhibit I'd let you drop a kid in me.

Fun-Filled Hey Baby Jokes to Make You and Your Friends Chuckle & Giggle

What funny jokes about hey baby you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean matter baby jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hey baby pranks.

Man: "Hey baby, what's your sign?"
Woman: "Do not enter."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Hey baby, there's an OverflowException in my pants, care to handle it for me?

Hey baby, if I supply the voltage and you some resistance, imagine the current we can make together.

Hey baby, I heard that rabbits, can make 150 babies a year, how many do you think we can make in an hour?

Hey baby, what's your resonance frequency?

Hey baby, wanna violate the Pauli Exclusion Principle with me?

Hey baby, I'm a power source, and you're the kind of resistor i'd like to deliver my load to.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Hey baby, wanna play lion? OK. You go kneel right there and I'll throw you my meat.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Hey baby...I can s**... the chrome off a trailer hitch?

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Comment found on an FB
pic of a new born baby

"Hey kid, Spoiler Alert: Life s**...."

So there is a mother and her daughter sitting on the plane.

They haven't taken off yet and are still on the runway. The daughter, who is pretty young, say four or five, looks out the window and gets to thinking....
"Mommy. If big dogs have puppies and big cats have kittens, then shouldn't big airplanes have little baby airplanes?"
And the mom, she's hungover and jet lagged.
"aw, baby, just go ask the stewardess"
So the daughter gets up to ask the flight attendant.
"Hey stewardess lady, if big dogs have puppies and big cats have kittens then shouldn't big airplanes have little baby airplanes?"
And the stewardss says "did your mother tell you to come ask me this?" The girl nods.
"well, you see, sweetheart, this is JetBlue. And we always pull out on time. That's why there's no baby airplanes. Go ask your mom about that."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

A black knight moves into a new village with only white people...

...after a year, a white girl in the village gives birth to a black child. A shepherd goes up to the knight and says: "I think you had s**... with that girl, since you're the only black person in this entire village." The knight responds: "Well, sometimes weird things just happen, like your single white sheep among your heard of black sheep." The shepherd says: "Hey! You say nothing bout the sheep, I say nothing bout the baby."

Marriage to the end?

So, this man and woman are married 44 years and the woman dies, then a few months later the man dies. When he gets to heaven, his wife runs up to him and says, "Hey baby!" and he says,"Sorry honey, death's done us part."

Two men are in the operating room

Two men are in the operating room getting prepared for surgery.
One says to the other, "Hey buddy, what are you in for?"
The other says, " I'm here to get my tonsils taken out"
The first man says "Oh that's not so bad. I had that done when I was younger, and I got to eat ice cream for two days strait."
The second man felt at ease with this reassurance. "Thanks for that, doesn't sound so bad. What about you, what are you in for?"
The first man says, "I'm here to get circumcised."
The second man says" Oh I had that done when I was a baby. I couldn't walk for over a year!"

An Israeli man, a Palestinian man, and an Ethiopian man are in a maternity ward waiting room.

An Israeli man, a Palestinian man, and an Ethiopian man are in a maternity ward waiting room. The nurse walks in and explains that there's been a terrible mix up with the babies, and that the fathers are going to have to figure out amongst themselves which baby belongs to whom. The Israeli man springs up out of his chair and volunteers to go first.
A few minutes later the Israeli man returns holding a newborn baby in his arms. The baby is clearly Ethiopian.
The Ethiopian man shouts in anger "Hey! I KNOW that baby is MINE!" to which the Israeli man replies: "One of the two babies left is Palestinian, and I'm not taking any chances!"

What was the bear's favourite pick-up line?

Hey baby, what's ursine?

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Hey baby, you got an inhaler?

Because you got dat a**...-ma.

Hey, baby. Are you cheese?

'Cause you look gouda to me.

All Pedro wanted was weeweechu

It's a romantic full moon, when Pedro said, "Hey, mamacita, let's do Weeweechu."
Oh no, not now, let's lo ok at the moon!" said Rosita.
Oh, c'mon baby, let's you and I do Weeweechu. I love you and it's the perfect time," Pedro begged.
"But I wanna just hold your hand and watch the moon." replied Rosita.
Please, corazoncito, just once, do Weeweechu with me."
Rosita looked at Pedro and said, "OK, one time, we'll do Weeweechu."
Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang..... "Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year." MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!! In advance😉😉

Hey baby, you and I go together like...

Food Network producers and cymbals.

Hey, baby, are you 32-bit?

Before we left the room, our teacher told us all to pick up at least one piece of trash on our way out.

So as I walked out the classroom, I looked at her and said "Hey baby, here's my number, call me."

I've been practicing pickup lines for depressed men...

Hey baby, can you get your pants lower than my self-esteem?

A boy goes up to a girl and says "hey baby what's up"...

She says "I have a boyfriend", he says "I have a math test".
The girl says "What's that got to do with anything?", he replies "I thought we were just naming things we are going to cheat on."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Hey baby, you're just like a plastic bag...

You take my breath away.

How do Harry Potter fans flirt?

Hey baby, mind if I *Slytherin* ? ;)

Nerdy pickup line.

Hey baby, Are you uranium because I'm Iodine and if it was up to me I would rearrange the periodic table around and put U and I together. ;)

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Hey baby, forget Netflix and chill

Let's Imax and c**...

Hey baby do you build portable wienerschnitzels?

Because you make my hotdog stand

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Husband: Hey baby, hold my jock strap.

Wife: That's disgusting why would I hold your jock strap?
Husband: Well I always hold your purse for you.
Wife: That's not remotely the same.
Husband: Why not, they both hold our junk.

Hey, Baby, you work for the TSA?

'Cause I've got a suspicious package, and I need you to blow it.

Hey baby, Heaven must be missing an angle

because you're kindacute.

hey baby, are you my market equilibrium point?

cause you're supplying exactly what I'm demanding

Fish Pickup Lines:

"Hey, baby. Wanna come over to my place and make caviar?"

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Hey girl, are you a gorilla enclosure..

Because I wanna drop a baby in you

A male unexploded landmine was in love with a female unexploded landmine and he said to her ...

"Hey baby, we should bang sometime."

Hey baby are you bread?

cuz i knead you

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Hey Baby are you Rockefeller?

Because I think we should Horizontally Integrate.

Hey baby you like hardware stores?

Because I'd like to show you menards.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Hey baby, are you from Tennessee?

Cause you look extremely i**...

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Hey baby, are you secure?

Because I'd love to run some p**... tests on you.

Two Hydrogens walk into a bar and spot an Oxygen

Feeling adventurous, they approach her and ask "Hey baby, can we interest you in a waterway?"

A black guy was holding his eight-month-old baby

A black guy was holding his eight-month-old baby while his wife was in the kitchen fixing lunch. The baby murmured, "mother."
The guy gets all excited and hollered to his wife, "Hey, the baby just said half a word!"

Hey baby, are you a magnet?

Because you're bipolar.

A guy walks up to the pretty girl working at the comic book store and say" Hey baby are you into werewolves..."

"Cause I'm lycan the way you look"

A baseball pitcher is walking home...

after a long and exhausting game. Suddenly, bright lights appear in the sky directly above him, and a beautiful angel descends from above, wearing an umpire's mask and a catcher's mitt.
The pitcher looks up, gapes and thinks, "Heavens! She's so pretty."
Without skipping a beat, his shoulders slump back, his grin shines out of his mouth, he winks and says, "Hey baby. Wanna play some catch? Looking up at you makes me want to throw up."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Psychic Phone s**... Hotline

Hey baby, tell me what I'm wearing.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Me: Hey baby, you want some great s**......... Her - No.

Me : You came to the right guy.

What did one CoAxl cable say to the other?

"Hey baby - let's screw"

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

A Chinese man stumbles home late one night really drunk...

Seeing his wife at the top of the stairs he says "hey baby how about a little number 69!"
The wife replies, "you drunk s**..., make your own Mongolian Beef Stew!"

What's a triangle's favorite pickup line?

Hey baby, what's your sine?

Heard this from a waiter at dinner tonight.

Hey baby, my name is Olaf...like the snowman. Mind if I melt inside you?
Five star restaurant I am laughing out loud right now hahaj

Hey baby, are you the nuclear war between America and Russia?

Because neither of us want to come first, but both want to fire

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Rich person phone s**...

Hey baby, who are you wearing?

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Hey baby are you the bottom of my laptop?

Cause you're hot and I'm getting nervous

What was Roy Moore's go-to pickup line as a child?

"Hey there, baby."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Kid1: Hey Dad why am I called lily?

Dad: Because a lily petal fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid2: Hey Dad why am I called rose?
Dad: Because a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid3: herdurrrrahduhrgh#%*?
Dad: Shut up Cinderblock

Hey, baby, have you been to Molten Core lately?

Because you're THE BOMB!

Joke my four year old just came up with. How do you put a baby bunny to sleep in a cradle?

A mushroom!
Hey may not be the funniest, but at least it's original!

Hey dad, why did you and mom name my sister Rose?

"Because a rose petal fell on her head when she was a baby, dear son," replied the Dad.
"Oh, thanks for telling me Dad!"
"No problem, Toaster Oven."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

I saw a baby standing on the corner of the street in midnight.

I ask the baby "hey baby what are you doing here in midnight", the baby replied "i'm selling w**... ni**a".

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

An Australian man is walking across Sydney Harbour Bridge when he sees his ex-girlfriend standing on the railings ...

An Australian man is walking across Sydney Harbour Bridge when he sees his ex\-girlfriend standing on the railings, about to commit s**.... He apporaches her and asks:
\- Hey Sheila, what's the matter?
Tears in here eyes, she says:
\- I'm pregnant Bruce, and it's your baby!
To which Bruce replies:
\- Woah Sheila, not only are you brilliant in bed \- you're also a great sport!

The 3 children

One day, a couple married and got 3 babies.
When they grew up, the first baby named Snowflake asked:
-Mommy, why is my name Snowflake?
-Because, sweetie, when me and your dad were exiting the hospital, a snowflake came and fell on your head!
Next day, the second child called Rain comes in:
-Mommy, why is my name Rain?
-Because, sweetie, when me and your dad were exiting the hospital, a droplet of rain fell on your head!
Next day, the third kid called [b]Closet[b] came:
-BLJAHFAHALHAHALAHAFNFAHA
(Joke translated from foreign language, might not be the funniest but hey)

jokes about hey baby