The Best 23 Herman Jokes

Following is our collection of Herman jokes which are very funny. There are some herman moffat jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these herman lunatic puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

A senior citizen called her husband during his drive home.

"Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Interstate 90, Please be careful!"

Herman said, "It's not just one car. There's hundreds of them!"

A sloth named Herman is walking through the forest one day.

A gang of snails approach him and beat him up. Herman is left at the bottom of a tree with several cuts and bruises. Several hours later he gathers up enough strength to go to a local police station. Herman walks into the Sergeant's office.

"What happened to you? the officer asks.
"A gang of snails beat me up," Herman replied.
"Can you describe what they looked like?"

"I don't know," the sloth says. "It all happened so fast."

You're in the Army Now

Fifty-one years ago, Herman James, a South Alabama man, was drafted by the Army. On his first day in basic training, the Army issued him a comb. That afternoon the Army barber sheared off all his hair.

On his second day, the Army issued Herman a toothbrush. That afternoon the Army dentist yanked seven of his teeth.

On the third day, the Army issued him a jock strap. The Army has been looking for Herman for 51 years.

Why did Pee Wee Herman win the annual bass fishing contest?

Experts say it's because he was a master baiter.

In 1991,

Pee Wee Herman was arrested for masturbating in a movie theater. What a lot of people do not realize is that he represented himself in court, believing he could get himself off.


You really can't blame Pee Wee Herman for what he did...

I mean, it's not like he could just do it at home with all of his furniture watching him..

Periodic abstinence as contraception can be successful, provided one meets three very strict conditions:

1. The woman must have a very regular menstrual cycle.
2. You must be able to count well.
3. And you must really love children.

Loosely translated from Herman Finkers. My favorite dutch comedian.

A senior citizen was driving down the freeway, when his phone rang

Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on 280. Please be careful!"

"Hell," said Herman, "It's not just one car. It's hundreds of them!"

Herman Cain is going to find out about the Coronavirus 5x5x5 plan.

Positive test within 5 days of TrumpRallyTulsa

He spread Coronavirus to least 5 of his friends

He only has 5 minutes left of his 15 minutes of fame

All this fuss over a film being stored on DNA

But when Pee Wee Herman tried to do the opposite, everybody lost their minds?

Yesterday, Bill Clinton endorsed Newt Gingrich's immigration policy

Today he's endorsing Herman Cain's domestic policy.

Top Herman Puns and Funny Jokes

You can explore herman adolf reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean herman bert dad jokes. There are also herman puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Two guys famous for having been shot in theaters . . .

. . . Abraham Lincoln, and the guy sitting in front of Peewee Herman

What does Jeffrey Dahmer and Peewee Herman have in common?

They were both caught with hands in their drawers.

Another sexual assault allegation against

Pee-wee Herman, he apparently sexually assaulted Anthony Weiner in a movie theater.

Shot in the back of the head

Name two people who were shot in the back of the head in a Theatre in America?

Abraham Lincoln and...

The guy in front of PeeWee Herman...

Name two people shot in the back of the head in a theatre.

Abe Lincoln and the guy sitting in front of Pee Wee Herman.

What does Pee Wee Herman and John Wilks Booth have in common?

They both got in big trouble for shooting someone in the back of the head in a theater.

A man came into a movie theater

Peewee Herman was later sent to jail

The actor who played Pee Wee Herman, Paul Reubens, has decided to start his own dry cleaning service.

It's called Drop Your Pants and Jacket Off


What did Pee-Wee Herman say to parents who accused him of being a child molester?

I know you are, but what am I?

Hermann von Salza is asked what time it is

"teu-ton" he responds

I'm thinking of opening a Pee-wee Herman themed juice bar.

It'll be called Jambi Juice.

What was the original title of Herman Melville's book about a white whale before Harper and Bros. published the edited version?

Moby Richard.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the herman herbert jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working herman guaca piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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