Heir Jokes

Following is our collection of successor puns and throne one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Heir jokes for adults, dirty hereditary jokes and clean merlin dad gags for kids.

The Best Heir Puns

What's it called when a King and Queen have no children?

A receding heir line...

Why did King Arthur leave no heir?

He was legendary for pulling out.

What is the difference between a prince, a bald headed man, a monkey and an orphan?

The first is an heir apparent, the second has no apparent hair, the third has hairy parent and the last has nary a parent.

What is the cannibal King's favorite joke during diner ?

"There's a heir in my soup !"

The owner of Bell Incorporated has just died...

The first in line to receive the inheritance is the owner's son, who gladly accepts it. However, the company lawyer says that he needs to take a photo of him for legal purposes. After developing the photo, he sends it off to the employees in the company to announce their new boss. He says "Here's the fresh prints of Bell heir".


Why couldn't Henry VIII breath?

He had no heir.

Edward Carrington Marshal, the only son of John Marshall, who was the original owner of the famous Liberty Bell, was found dead.

Police suspect Will Smith, since his fresh prints were found on the bell heir.

What is the difference between a tennis ball and the Prince of Wales?

One is thrown in the air, and the other is heir to the throne.

I convinced my son if he didn't try to keep me cool during Summer he wouldn't be written into my will...

Apparently I'm now a bad father simply for wanting some heir conditioning.

What did the disgruntled barber give to the prince?

A bad heir day.

Why did Prince Wlliam want to become a pilot?

Because he was the 101st heir born.


My barber was telling me about how he was going to disinherit his son...

Yeah, it was quite the heir cut.

A King and Queen are having trouble conceiving a child...

So the king starts holding his breath. When the Queen asks him why he says, "How can I breathe when there's no heir?"

What's the difference between a prince and a booger?

A prince is the heir the throne, a booger is thrown to the air.

Why did prince Oxygen inherit the throne after the king died?

Because he was the rightful heir

My parents didn't vaccinate their kids.

Fortunately, I was adopted by them and it helped me to become their sole heir.

What did the court jester call the balding crown prince?

The Heir Apparent with no Hair Apparent.

Why was the bald king so sad?

Because he had no heir.

What do you call it when a King gets a vasectomy?

A heir cut


What do you call a hypnotist that works with wealthy children during the summer?

an heir conditioner.

What is the difference between a chimpanzee with a baby, Prince Charles, and a person with alopecia?

One is a hairy parent, one is an heir apparent, and the other has no hair apparent.

Did you hear about the radio personality who murdered his only son while broadcasting because he didn't want him to receive any inheritance?

There was a lot of Dead heir on that show.

Why did Prince William lose his cool?

He wasn't properly heir conditioned.

What do you call a suffocating king?

No heir to the throne

My wife asked me to treat her like a queen.

So I divorced her when she failed to bear a male heir.

The Queen of all dairy was rumored to have the most beautiful successor in all the land.

She had the finest Dairy heir.

What do a prince and a football have in common?

One's heir to the throne, the other's thrown to the air.

Sorry.

How did the king die?

He had a bad heir day

What's the best way to send a letter to Prince Charles?

Heir mail

What do you call a spirit of pride, entitlement, privilege, and arrogance?

An heir elemental.

Both the milk man and his daughter

Had quite the dairy heir

My Hooters waitress was pregnant so I called the manager and said

"Can we get another waitress please? This one has an heir in it."

What do you call your best friend when he is the heir apparent to the Austro-Hungarian Empire?

**Frand Ferdinand**

What do you call a dying man's son with a cleft pallet?

Heir lip

Why did Queen Elizabeth I suffocate to death?

Because she had no heir.

Kevin and Stuart both named Bob as the sole beneficiary in their wills....

They made him a Multi Minion Heir

Did you hear about the prince who was having trouble at the barber?

He was having a bad heir day.

There is an abundance of commoner jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 37 funniest jokes and heir puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any royal witze you can hear about heir.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

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