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Heinz Jokes

39 heinz jokes and hilarious heinz puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about heinz that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Heinz Short Jokes

Short heinz jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The heinz humour may include short mustard jokes also.

  1. My son told me, Dad, I accidentally rubbed ketchup in my eyes, and now it burns. I said, That's Heinz sight for you.
  2. Why are your eyes covered in ketchup? I'm often asked by people: "Why are your eyes covered in ketchup?"
    So I tell them it's because Heinz sight is 20/20.
  3. Maybe I should have put more mustard on my cheeseburger In Heinz sight, I should have added more ketchup
  4. Every time I walk into a restaurant... I automatically find the condiments, because my Heinz-sight is 20/20.
  5. Did you know that putting ketchup on your glasses makes you see better It's because Heinz-sight is 20 20
  6. In retrospect, I should have known rubbing ketchup on my eyes would be useless. Oh well, Heinz-sight is 20/20 I guess.
  7. I used to think that putting ketchup on my glasses was a great way to clean them. But in Heinz sight, I don't think that was such a good idea.
  8. Shortage of Heinz ketchup packets... ... now secretly caused by usage for hemorrhoids. The company will now market "A" Heinz for restaurants and "B" Heinz for hemorrhoids.
  9. I forgot to check if my ketchup bottle's cap was tightened…spilled everywhere. Ah well, Heinz sight is 20/20.
  10. Company Heinz announces plans to produce PPE There is still global shortages. They will be playing Ketchup.

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Heinz One Liners

Which heinz one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with heinz? I can suggest the ones about mayonnaise and ketchup.

  1. The Ketchup shortage this year was so predictable. But I guess Heinz sight is 2020
  2. looking back, I wish I'd bought my baked beans online... Heinz site's a wonderful thing
  3. I smeared ketchup all over my eyes once... It was kind of a bad idea in Heinz-sight
  4. I could see every bottle of ketchup in the restaurant. Heinz sight is 20/20.
  5. How do you catch up with the past? With Heinz sight
  6. Why is it easy to tell when you use the wrong sauce? Heinz sight is 20 20
  7. Why do they call it Heinz field? Because the Steelers can't seem to ketchup.
  8. I used to rub ketchup in my eye Now i've got Heinz sight
  9. Why is it called Heinz Field? Because the Steelers were always playing catch up.
  10. Heinz have altered one of their spicier sauces. It's a remustard version.
  11. I used to can beans for a living, In Heinz sight it wasn't a bad job.
  12. What do you call a can of beans in retrospect Heinz-sight
  13. I onece visited the Heinz Beans factory It was a very uncanny experience
  14. Made my wife Heinze Alphabetti for dinner... ...but she choked on the D
  15. Just completed a mediocre essay on Heinz... I've been asked to check my sources.

Heinz Ketchup Jokes

Here is a list of funny heinz ketchup jokes and even better heinz ketchup puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Why does Heinz not care about competition? He knows they won't be able to ketchup to him.
  • I was wondering if my ketchup needed glasses But then I realized probably not since Heinz sight is 20/20
  • I have terrible eyesight, but for some reason I can see ketchup bottles really well. I guess Heinz sight is 20/20
  • The metropolitan police have received information that 1 in 3 bottles of Heinz ketchup may be poisonous... They say the sauce is unreliable...
  • I could never get ahead at the Heinz corporation It's been a never-ending game of ketchup
  • You can now buy ketchup and baked beans online. It's one of the benefits of Heinz site.
  • Heinz is releasing ketchup 2 and i didn't realise I need to catchup 2 news
  • I can't believe I've just spilt ketchup all over myself! In Heinz sight, it's actually pretty funny.
  • Why is Heinz the favorite ketchup of Germany? Because Heinz is number 1.
  • What is Walter White's favourite brand of ketchup? Heinz-enburg.
Heinz joke, What is Walter White's favourite brand of ketchup?

Entertaining Heinz Jokes to Laugh Out Loud Fun with Everyone

What funny jokes about heinz you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean wiener jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make heinz pranks.

I decided to e**... baked beans through my nose.

In Heinz sight, it was a terrible decision.

Heinz joke, Shortage of Heinz ketchup packets...