Healthy Family Jokes
7 healthy family jokes and hilarious healthy family puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about healthy family that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Healthy Family Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good healthy family joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
List of the shortest books
1. The Australian Book of Foreplay.
2. Contraception by the Pope.
3. The American Guide to Etiquette.
4. Healthy Marriages by the British Royal Family.
5. Consumer Marketing Ethics.
6. Career Opportunities for History Majors.
7. My Life's Memories by Ronald Reagan.
8. Integrity by Bill Clinton.
9. The Wit and Wisdom of George W. Bush.
10. What I've Accomplished by Barack Obama.
As a vegan mom, I prioritize maintaining a healthy lifestyle for me and my family, but keeping my kids active during quarantine isn't always easy, so we made up a new game...
The floor is ground beef!
Three men, a Republican, a Brit and a Jamaican
all in the maternity ward waiting for their partners to give birth. The midwife comes out and tells them congratulations, they're all fathers of beautiful healthy boys, however, unfortunately they've run out of the name tags, and the babies have been mixed up, so if they could each go in and identify their sons from any family resemblance etc. The Brit wants to go first, so in he goes and comes out with a black baby The Jamaican looks a bit confused, "excuse me", he said, "but don't you think he's likely to be mine ?" "Probably", said the Brit, "but one of them in there's a Republican, and I'm takin' no chances !!!!!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three men found a genie lamp that grants the opposite of what is wished
The first man wishes that he would win the lottery. He buys his first ticket, and loses, buys his second ticket, and loses. Every week the man dumped his savings into lottery tickets, until he was completely broke.
The second man wishes for a healthy and long life. He decides to a**... his wish by smoking and drinking as much as he wanted. Five years later he died of complications related to his lifestyle.
The third man wishes for a beautiful and intelligent woman, that he could build a happy family with.
And that, kids, is how I met your mother.
Before John was a traveling salesmen
Before John was a traveling salesman he worked door to door on foot. He actually came from an upper middle class family but had a healthy work ethic and a humble yet dull nature from aristocratic inbreeding a few generations back..
It was his birthday and his eccentric mother had told John he could have only one of the two presents she bought for him and she would return the other. After cake , John was led out to the front of the house where he saw a beautiful new dark blue four door sedan. The other choice was a fine black stallion of superior breeding . John looked carefully at both options then yelled Gimme the Karma
A young man went to church one day...
A young man went to church one day, and during the service he saw a lovely young woman. Being a healthy, red-blooded young man, he decided to go up to her after the service and introduce himself. When he asked her for her name, she replied "Jezebel," with a wry little smile.
"Jezebel?" said the young man, with a fair bit of shock. "Why would a good Christian family name their daughter Jezebel?"
"Well," she replied, "after my sister Chastity slept with half the football team, and my sister Charity was kicked out of the Girl Scouts for stealing cookie money, my parents decided to try a different approach."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Any good chemistry jokes?
A ketone and a primary amine walk into a bar and yell "Let's get Schiff based!"
Why couldn't the hemiacetal maintain a healthy relationship with his family?
He wasn't very stable and was never seen without alcohol.
An organic chemist wanted to reduce a ketone, but not the adjacent aldehyde. His partner suggested that he treat the aldehyde with ethylene glycol to form a cyclic acetal in order to protect the aldehyde from reduction, but he did not listen. He proceeded with the reaction, and both the ketone and aldehyde were reduced.
"This s**...," says the chemist. "I really wanted that aldehyde."
His partner says "Well, if you liked it, then you should have put a ring on it."
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