Hate Jokes

Following is our collection of despise humor and racism one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Hate puns for adults, dirty prefer jokes or clean you will hate fridays gags for kids.

There is an abundance of disdain jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 69 funniest jokes on hate. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any hatred witze you can hear about hate.

The Best jokes about Hate

I hate when people ask how I see myself in 3 years

I don't have 2020 vision

My therapist told me that a great way to let go of your anger is to write letters to people you hate and then burn them...


I did that and I feel much better but I'm wondering...do I keep the letters?

I hate when my girlfriend gets mad at me for being lazy

It's not like I did anything

Chess is banned under Islam

They hate that the queen moves freely.

I hate how politically correct the world is these days, you can't even say black paint

You have to say

Leroy, please paint that wall


I wrote down the names of all the people I hate, and my roommate used it to roll his joint.

He is now high on my list of people I never wanna see again.

As the KKK are so full of hate, bigotry and want to rid America of others...

Should we call them Vanilla Isis ?

Fishermen hate him- You won't believe the one item he uses to catch more fish than anyone else

Click bait.

Don't you hate it when you're driving along smoking a cigarette, you flick it out the window and you drive for a couple more miles and smell something funny and you look over onto the back seat and sure enough..

Grandma's fingering herself again

I HATE when homeless people shake their cans of change at me.

I get it, you have more money than me, you don't have to show off.

I hate it when people subtly flex where they went to college

I have this friend who went to Harvard and he just won't shut tf up about it. He's always been like this, even when we were in college together.


Don't you hate it when you can't sleep because you are reminded of a mistake you made 2 years ago?

I hate it when my kid cries in the middle of the night

I hate people who take drugs

For example, border security.

My psychologist told me:

"Write letters to the people you hate and later on you burn them."

I have done so, but now I don't know what to do with the letters...

Fishermen hate himβ€”you'll never guess this one strange item he uses to catch more fish than anyone else

Click bait

I like to stand in the corner of my psychiatrist's waiting room and blow on anyone who walks by...

Most people hate it, but I'm a fan...

I hate how funerals are always at 9 or 10am...

I'm not really a mourning person.

The Best Actually Racist Joke I know

*I hate myself for repeating this. But I heard this when I was living in Texas.*

Two rednecks are admiring their firearms. One says, I keep these around for hunting, home protection, and to defend my 2nd amendment rights. The second says, I just like shooting cans.

That's a lot of firepower just for shooting cans.

Well, there's so many of them: Mexi-cans, Afri-cans, Puerto Ri-cans...

I hate it when engineering students refer to themselves as engineers...

Like you don't see med students calling themselves doctors or arts students calling themselves unemployed.


Why do Indians hate snow?

Because it's white and settles on their land.

Why does Oedipus hate profanity?

He kisses his mother with that mouth.

Normally I hate those trashy, fake, rigged reality TV shows...

But I might watch the presidential debate tonight anyway.

"The neighbors hate us."

"The neighbors hate us."
"Why?"
"Well, you remember when we had that bonfire in my yard, and were roasting marshmallows?"
"Yeah, that was really fun."
"And remember how the house up the road caught fire, and all those fire engines came, and we ran to see what was going on, and the wife was crying in her husband's arms, and how everyone looked at us funny?"
"Yeah, I remember! I wondered what we'd done..."
"We were still holding our marshmallow sticks."

Why do Jihadist Muslims only drink instant coffee?

'Cause they hate the French press

I hate those people that bang on your door saying you need to be saved or else you'll burn

Stupid firemen

I hate people who take drugs...

specifically the DEA and US Customs.

Hey guys, don't you just hate it when you're woken up in the middle of the night for sex?

can't wait to get out of prison.

Is it OK to hate certain races?

Try as I might I just can't get myself to like the 200 meter dash.

I yelled "shotgun", long before anyone else, but I still got to sit in the backseat.

I hate cops.

I hate when a girl says the wrong name during sex

They know my name isnt Someone Help

A jew and a Chinese man are in an argument...

The jew says, "I hate your people for what you did at pearl harbour". The Chinese man says, what do you mean? That was the Japanese!". The jew replies, "Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, you're all the same. So the Chinese man says, "Well I hate your people for sinking the titanic". The jew says, "That's ridiculous; an iceberg sunk the titanic!". The Chinese man responds, "Iceberg, Goldberg, Silverberg, you're all the same".

I hate being bipolar, it's great

Since We're Doing Pirate Jokes. What Does Every Pirate Hate?

A small chest with no booty.

Is it okay to hate a certain race?

I usually run the 5K, but someone from my running group wants to do the 10K, which I don't want because a lot of caucasians participate in that one.

I hate people that take drugs..

Especially police and customs.

Kids are like farts...

I hate everyone elses but for some weird reason I like my own.

I love eating babies and smiling

but I hate punctuation

How can you tell someone hates vegans, cross fitters, and atheists?

Don't worry, they'll repost a joke about it.

My Wife just accused me of hating her side of the family and relatives.

I replied, "No, I don't hate your relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law a lot better than I like mine."

My Therapist told me "Write letters to the people you hate......"

My Therapist told me "Write letters to the people who you hate and burn them later".
I did that.... But now what should i do with the letters???

Why do native Americans hate April?

Because April showers bring May flowers and Mayflowers bring white people

I hate to admit it, but my wife's cooking has seriously improved.

......that was best slice of soup I've ever had!

I always wanted to be Batman when I grew up

Not for the gadgets or the money. I just hate my parents.

I hate when people don't leave a suicide note.

Would it kill them to write few sentences?

Why didn't the gay pirate have a parrot?

Because he preferred a cock-er-two!

This is my first original pirate-themed joke. I have more on the way. Love it? Hate it? Let me know!

Why are there no casinos in China?

They hate Tibet.

Don't you hate it when people ask you a question just so they can answer it themselves?

Because I do

Congratulations West Ham

The only club named after two things that ISIS hate.

I hate people who talk behind my back.

They discussed me.

I hate women who lie over the smallest things.

My girlfriend of 2 months told me she had a lot of abandonment issues. I looked it up online and that's not even a real magazine. So I packed my bags and left her.

I hate breakups.

Especially when they try to let you down gently.
"It's not you, it's me" "I just need some space" "We can still be cousins".

I hate those people who knock on your door and tell you you need to be "saved" or you'll "burn"

Stupid firemen.

Is it wrong to hate a specific race

Because I really hate marathons

A little black kid is helping his mum cook and he puts flour on his face and says "look ma, I'm a white man"

She slaps him and tells him to go say that to his grandma.

He goes to his grandma and says "look, I'm a white man". She slaps him too and tells him to go tell his father.

He goes to his father and says "look dad, I'm a white man" He slaps him too and asks "what have you learned?"

The boy says, "I've only been white two minutes and I already hate you black bastards."

I hate how politically correct the world is today

Instead of saying "Black paint" I now have to say "Jamal please paint"

I seriously hate it when a couple starts having an argument in front of you.

They could have least waited until I got dressed and left.

Why did the vegetarian hate giving blow jobs?

She was a lesbian.

I hate being bipolar.

It's awesome

So a finch asks his mother...

"Mom, why does my beak look different than yours?"
She replies, "Well son, I hate to break it to you, but you're adapted."

Why do CSGO terrorists hate the desert?

Because they don't want de dust 2 get in their eyes.

A British man was talking to his friend about his views on Brexit...

"These bloody immigrants come over here. They're up to no good, right? I hate these bloody immigrants. They need to go back to where they came from."


His friend replies with "But why do you hate them so much?"


The British man replies, "I'll tell you why I hate them, I'll tell you why. It's because they're not even trying to be British. That's why. They don't even TRY to be British. They come here, and bring their own bloody culture. They bring their own food, spit their own bloody languages, try to take over the whole bloody place."

His friend replies with "Well, that sounds British to me"

Hollywood is remaking Brokeback Mountain with Margot Robbie and Emma Watson

On the one hand, I hate that they have to remake all the classic movies with female leads as if that somehow makes them better. On the other hand, lotion.

Is it wrong to hate an entire race?

I just think marathons are *way* too much running

Idiot Teacher

"If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up" said the sarcastic teacher.

After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet.

"Now then mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?" inquired the teacher with a sneer.

"Well, actually I don't," said the student, "but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself."

So a wife is yelling at her husband to get out of the house...

"I hate you, I want a divorce! Get out!"

As he walks out the door she screams: "I hope you die a slow and painful death!"

Husband says: "So wait a minute, now you want me to stay?"

I'm American and I hate it when people say that America is the stupidest country in the world.

Personally, I think Europe is the stupidest country in the world.

What do broccoli and sex have in common? NSFW

If you were forced to have it as a child you're gonna hate it as an adult.

I don't understand all the hate for Ajit Pai. He's just doing his job.

If he didn't, Verizon would probably fire him.

Why do dentists only want to be awarded with paper certificates?

They hate plaque buildup.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes