Hatch Jokes
24 hatch jokes and hilarious hatch puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hatch that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article covers a variety of jokes inspired by the classic Hatch chile pepper. With this spiciness as inspiration, we open up the submarine of funny one-liners to make sure your next gathering is filled with laughter. Stop by for some unique egg-based puns and a never-ending supply of zest.
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Funniest Hatch Short Jokes
Short hatch jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hatch humour may include short hitch jokes also.
- The best thing about alcohol hand gel in hospitals isn't the hygiene. It's that everyone walks around like they're hatching a dastardly plan.
- A mother Chameleon was so overcome with joy when her eggs hatched that her camouflage dropped. Looking down excitedly, she exclaimed, "I've become apparent!"
- My friend is a magician and he said he could make a chicken hatch back into an egg But first he would need to add a rear door to the chicken coupe
- Hey girl, do you play Pokemon GO? Because I wouldn't mind helping you hatch some of your eggs.
- A man in New Mexico asked a farmer if he had any local chili peppers for sale. Unfortunately, the farmer said he had 99 poblanos but a Hatch ain't one.
- When I was young, my dad had 3 rules.. 1. Never count your chickens before they hatch.
2. They hatch.
3. Your chickens. - After charging morbidly obese people extra for their plane seats, air traffic companies hatched a plan to schedule special flights for morbidly obese people in the future... but it never took off.
- Spike from the Land Before Time movies is the best character ever! Literally in the first 30 seconds after hatching he yawns, eats an entire bush, and takes a nap, he's like me on valentines day.
- We call the offices to register Births, Marriages and Death's in our town.... Hatch em, Match em and Dispatch em.
- I ate a few cocoons right before they hatched and have to go to the doctors. I've got butterflies in my stomach.
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Hatch One Liners
Which hatch one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hatch? I can suggest the ones about hunch and hinges.
- An evil baked potato hatched a devious scheme Fortunately, it was foiled.
- - Knock knock! \- Who's there?
\- Hatch!
\- Hatch who?
\- Bless you! - What type of cars do chickens drive? Hatch-backs with a clutch.
- It was my first time getting laid 5 minutes ago I'm hoping to hatch soon.
- The chicken's egg never hatched... It was a bad yoke.
- ADHD in just-hatched chicks is also known as ... Restless Egg Syndrome
- What moustache? A chicken.
What?
A chicken must hatch. - If you were a h**.... You probably just hatched!
Unearthly Funniest Hatch Jokes to Tickle Your Sides
What funny jokes about hatch you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean hijack jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hatch pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Obama, Putin and Merkel at the baltic sea
Obama declares: Our submarines can stay submerged for ten days before needing air.
Putin promptly says: That's nothing. Russian submarines can stay submerged for up to a month.
Merkel is embarrassed and stays silent.
Suddenly a submarine emerges. The hatch opens and the man yells: Heil h**...! Is the war over?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Dr Hatcher got in trouble and was fired because he had s**... with his patient.
Problem was, he was a veterinarian.
My grandfather died in the polish navy...
...on the sub that with the screen door, but it didn't sink that way.
What happened was my grandfather looked through the porthole, saw the screen door flapping and decided to open the hatch to close it.
-&y
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A UN delegation was flying across the Atlantic...
A Brit, a Frenchman, an American, and a Mexican are told by the pilot that they are too heavy and may c**....
They pop the hatch and toss out all the luggage, but they're still too heavy.
They rip out the seats and toss them, but they're still too heavy.
The Brit stands up and yells God save the Queen! and jumps out, but they're still too heavy.
The Frenchman stands and yells Vive la France! and jumps out, but they're still too heavy.
The American stands and yells Remember the Alamo! and throws out the Mexican.
What's better than bitcoin?
Chicken coin. Because you can count them!
But not before they hatch!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Trump, Putin and Merkel are sitting at the North Sea...
..when Putin goes "We have submarines, that can stay up to 12 days under water without refueling!"
Trump replies "Ha, that's nothing, we have a huge tremendous one that can stay up to 2 month without refueling!"
Merkel feeling ashamed, staring down on the ground.
At the exact moment an old, rusty submarine is raising out of the water. The hatch opens, a man with long grey beard and dirty clothes climbs out and yells "Heil h**..., we need more diesel!"
a brunette, ad red head, and a blonde escape from prison
The three ladies hatch a plot to escape from prison by hiding in a laundry truck. As soon as the truck stops, they jump out and make a run for it.
Being in the middle of nowhere they head for a plume of smoke that seems to be coming from a chimney.
Upon arriving at a farm, they hear sirens and dogs barking not far behind them.
In a panic, the ladies run into a barn and close the door.
Looking for a place to hide, they find three burlap sacks on the ground, and each one climbs inside a sack.
Hiding quietly, they hear the barn door open and the prison warden followed by three guards walk in.
the warden walks up to a sack and kicks it. the brunette inside yelps, "ruff, ruff, ruff!"
"eh, just some puppies" says the warden.
the warden walks up to the sack where the redhead is hiding, kicks it, and hears "meow, meow", and says "eh, just some kittens".
So he walks up to the sack where the blond is hiding, kicks it and hears "potatoes, potatoes!"
The London Philharmonic is getting set up to play Beethoven's Ninth Symphony.
Everybody's practicing their parts, except for the bass players - they barely have any notes at all, just at the very beginning and the very end. So they hatch a plan: during the performance, they'll all sneak out and go to the pub for some brews. The lead bassist ties a string to the last page of the conductor's score, to alert them so they can get back in time.
Performance night rolls around, and the curtains roll up to a magnificent opening segment. The bassists duck behind the percussion and run to the nearest bar. They order a couple of drinks and joke to themselves about how ridiculous they look in tailed, double-breasted tuxedos when suddenly they are approached by a man dressed even more formally, wearing a crown and long gown. He introduces himself as the Count of Bavaria, a true regal fellow. Before they know it everybody is chatting it up and the Count orders a *huge* plate of nachos. This is a massive plate - big enough for three men - but the Count, he must be starving because he eats every last bite. The bassists are enjoying their drinks and starting to get a bit drunk, when they notice they've got to rush back... Meanwhile, back at the performance, the conductor has turned the last page. He sees the string, and it dawns on him: it's the bottom of the ninth, the bassists are loaded and the count is full.
