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Hassle Jokes

29 hassle jokes and hilarious hassle puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about hassle that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Hassle Short Jokes

Short hassle jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The hassle humour may include short fuss jokes also.

  1. David Hasselhoff calls his Agent and demands, "I want everyone to call me The Hoff from now on." His Agent says, "Sure. No hassle."
  2. David Hasselhoff told his agent that he wants to be known as Hoff from now on. Agent: Sure David. No hassle.
  3. David Hasselhoff walks into a bar and orders a drink. It's a pleasure to serve you, Mr Hasselhoff, says the bartender.
    Just call me Hoff, he replied.
    Sure, said the bartender, No hassle.
  4. Why did david hasselhoff change his name to 'The Hoff'? He couldn't be bothered with the hassle
  5. This Vietnamese couple I knew got married... Luckily for them they shared the same last name so it wasn't a big hassle for either of them. It was a Nguyễn-Nguyễn situation.
  6. My ex-girlfriend made a really great cake the other day Getting her legs to fit in the oven was a real hassle, though.
  7. Women are like boats I'd rather pay for the occasional ride than go through the hassle of having my own.
  8. My Vietnamese friends just got married, but by coincidence share the same last name so there was no hassle... It was a Nguyễn-Nguyễn situation.
  9. David Hasselhoff walks into a bar. Bartender: What can I get you Mr Hasselhoff?
    David: I want you to call me David Hoff.
    Bartender: Okay David Hoff, no hassle.
  10. David Hasslehoff walks into a Glasgow pub And barman says "what will it he Mr Hasslehoff"
    David says, please it's just "Hoff"
    And the barman replies "sure nae Hassle, Hoff"

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Hassle One Liners

Which hassle one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with hassle? I can suggest the ones about annoyance and trouble.

  1. I'm a tire in real life It's a wheel hassle.
  2. Being married with 2 kids is awful. Their parents won't stop hassling me.
  3. Snow is like the Jews ... No hassle if you have a working furnace.

Hassle joke, Snow is like the Jews ...

Hilarious Hassle Jokes for a Fun-Filled Night with Friends

What funny jokes about hassle you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean bother jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make hassle pranks.

David Hasselhoff walked into a bar

and ordered a drink.
Its a pleasure to serve you, Mr Hasselhoff, said the bartender.
Just call me Hoff, the actor replied.
Sure, the bartender said, no hassle.

David Hasselhoff walks into a bar..

It's a pleasure to serve you, Mr. Hasselhoff , said the bartender.
Just call me Hoff, if it's not too much trouble , he replied.
Sure , said the bartender, no hassle .

David Hasselhoff walked into a bar and ordered a drink.

David Hasselhoff walked into a bar and ordered a drink. "It's a pleasure to serve you Mr Hasselhoff, said the bartender.
Just call me Hoff, he replied.
Sure, said the bartender. No hassle.

A man gets married and decides to set some ground rules..

"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want, and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride thought for a minute and replied, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be s**... here at seven o'clock every night... whether you're here or not."

"Who's that over there talking to himself?" I asked the barman in the pub.

"That's Bill," He replied. "He comes in every dinner time and sits and has a drink with his imaginary wife."
"Is he a loony?" I asked.
"What makes you say that?" He laughed.
"Why else would you have an imaginary wife?" I replied, "an imaginary girlfriend would be far less hassle, and you'd still get regular s**...."

A police officer arrests a drunk man

After minutes of hassle getting the man in the police car, they're finally ready to go.
The officers turns around and says "Please fasten your seatbelt".
The man smirks and says "It's ok. Nobody will pull us over"

David Hasselhoff walks into a bar and says to the barman...

..."I want you to call me David Hoff".
The barman replies:
"Sure thing Dave... no hassle."

Did you hear why David Hasselhoff shortened his name to just Hoff?

Because he couldn't handle the hassle...

I work at a tree stand, and had to my first return today.

I was worried that it might be a hassle, but it turned out pine.

ypical macho man married typical good-looking lady

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be s**... here at seven o'clock every night... whether you're here or not."

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be s**... here at seven o'clock every night... whether you're here or not."

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding,

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be s**... here at seven o'clock every night... whether you're here or not."

Typical macho man...

...married a typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want-and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said, "Nope, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be s**... here at seven o'clock every night...... whether you're here or not."

A Jewish man is elected president...

Soon after, he calls up his mother to tell her the good news. "Mom, did you hear, I've been elected president!" "Oh, T
That's so great to hear, darling. I'm so proud of you!"
"So," asks the man, "you'll be coming out for the inauguration, right?" "I'm not sure," says his mother, "D.C. is so cold this time of year." "I'm the president, mom. I can arrange for you to get any sweater you want."
"I'm still not sure," continues his mother, "flying across the country is such a hassle." "Mom, I'll have you flown out here on Air Force One. It'll be no trouble to you." Finally, his mother agrees.
The day of the inaguration rolls around, and his mother is seated between the Vice President and the Secretary of State. As the man is being sworn in, his mother nudges the vice president.
"You see that boy up there? The one with his hand on the Bible? His brother's a doctor. "

Hassle joke, A Jewish man is elected president...