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Harrying Jokes

111 harrying jokes and hilarious harrying puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about harrying that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Harrying Short Jokes

Short harrying jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The harrying humour may include short jokes also.

  1. If you take the first two letters of the title of each the 7 harry potter books, it spells out a secret message HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
  2. Harry Potter has way too many characters... Even J.K. Rowling has a hard time keeping all the characters straight.
  3. Why are people acting like Kamala Harris is the first woman to obtain such a high ranking position in the US Government? Have we all forgotten that Monica Lewinsky was directly under Bill Clinton?
  4. I never really liked Nearly Headless Nick in the Harry Potter franchise. He was a poorly executed character.
  5. I liked the Harry Potter books and movies but... I just feel like the character Nearly Headless Nick was a bit poorly executed.
  6. I really loved the Harry Potter books. But the Gryffindor ghost, "Nearly Headless Nick" has always annoyed me. I think it's because he really was poorly executed.
  7. I just saw that Harry Potter film. I think its a bit unrealistic if you ask me.. I mean, a ginger kid, with two friends? How?
  8. I found the first four books of the Harry Potter series to be quite lighthearted. But the fifth one—-dead Sirius.
  9. My friends, the Leas, are planning to name their firstborn after their favorite Harry Potter character. Sirius Lea, it's true
  10. Harry was blind... ... His friends bought him a silver-coated nutmeg grater for his birthday. When they asked how he liked it, he said it was the most violent story he'd ever read.

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Harrying One Liners

Which harrying one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with harrying? I can suggest the ones about and .

  1. What is Harry Potter's favorite way to get down a hill? walking.

    j/k…rolling.
  2. How does Harry Potter get down a hill? By walking.
    J.K. Rowling
  3. How does the author of Harry Potter get down a hill? By walking. JK. Rolling
  4. How did Harry Potter make it to the bottom of the hill? By walking... jk rolling
  5. How did harry potter get down the hill? Walking.
    LoL
    JK. Rolling.
  6. What did Harry Potter say when he was filling up his car? Expensive Petroleum
  7. I met a girl who was a solid 10 but she hated Harry Potter Now she is a 9¾
  8. How does Harry Potter like his sandwiches to be cut ? Diagon alley
  9. What is Harry Potter's favorite method of getting down a hill? Walking....
    Jk, rolling
  10. You're a unit of power, Harry. Harry: I'm a watt?
  11. Why did Harry Potter get pulled over for speeding? Because he didn't expect-no-patrol-man
  12. "You're a unit of electrical energy, Harry." "I'm a watt?"
  13. How did Harry Potter get down the mountain? Running!... JK, Rowling.
  14. On a scale of 1 to 10, how obsessed with the Harry Potter Series am I? 9 3/4
  15. Why didn't Harry Potter want to date Hermione? Because he likes to Hit it and Quidditch

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about harrying can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of harrying puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Harrying Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about harrying you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make harrying prank.

Frank and Harry are at their golf club...

As Frank gets set to take his swing, a f**... procession goes by. He steps back, takes his hat off and holds it over his heart. Harry walks over, puts his hand on Frank's shoulder and says "That was a thoughtful thing to do". To which Frank replies "It was the least I could do, we were married for 30 years."

Can you Imagine?


Can you imagine stuffing pictures of your grandmother in a strippers G string?
Imagine you are Prince Harry

I never remember silly things

A few old couples used to get together to talk about life and to have a good time.
One day one of the men, Harry, started talking about this fantastic restaurant he went to the other night with his wife.
Really? ,
one of the men said, what's it called? After thinking for a few seconds the Harry said, what are those good smelling flowers called again?
Do you mean a rose? the first man questioned.
Yes that's it, he exclaimed.
Looking over at his wife he said, Rose what's that restaurant we went to the other night?

I cooked for my fiancée's parents for the first time

As I handed out the rarely cooked steak Harry (her father) said, "I like it well done."
I said, "Thanks, that means a lot."

My dad's favourite joke - Harry the vampire bat

So one day Harry the vampire bat gets back to his cave, with his entire face absolutely covered with blood. All the other bats are incredulous, demanding where Harry found all the blood. Harry agrees to show them. So they all follow Harry out of the cave, over the river, and through some fields, until they get to a field with a single tree in the middle of it. All the bats are impatient, saying 'Harry is the blood here? Where is it, man? Harry replied 'You see that tree there? I didn't.'

For my cake day, a joke...

Harry answers the telephone, and it's an Emergency Room doctor. The doctor says, "Your wife was in a serious car accident, and I have bad news and good news. The bad news is she has lost all use of both arms and both legs, and will need help eating and going to the bathroom for the rest of her life."
Harry says, "My God. What's the good news?"
The doctor says, "I'm kidding. She's dead."

Alien abduction

Harry, Bill, and Steve are siting at the corner bar, when Ted walks in looking distressed. "Ted, you look awful. What's wrong?" Harry asks.
Ted says, "Last night I got really drunk and was abducted by an alien." Everyone is shocked. Bill asks, "What did the alien do to you?" "All I remember is being anally probed." Ted says. Everyone is horrified. "I heard that they'll do that." Says Harry. "What did the alien look like?" Ted responds, "Steve."

Cheating Partner

A woman was in bed having s**... with her husband's friend, when all of a sudden the telephone rings, she answers.
After hanging up she says, ''That was Harry, but don't worry, he won't be home for a while. He's playing cards with you."

Harry is taking a stroll through the woods....

...when he finds a large hole in the ground. The hole seems ridiculously deep, so Harry takes a small rock and throws it down the hole. Then he listens for the sound of the rock hitting the ground below. He doesn't hear anything, so next he tries a larger rock. Still, no sound. He looks around for something larger, and he finds an old railroad tie. He lifts up the railroad tie and chucks it down the hole. Still no sound.
Then out of NOWHERE, Harry sees a goat charging at him full speed from behind. Harry dives out of the way, then watches as the goat charges strait down the hole.
Harry is sitting there, perplexed, when a farmer approaches Harry and asks
Farmer: "Hey son, you haven't seen a goat around here have you?"
Harry: "Actually, Yes I did! It was the strangest thing, a goat just charged me full speed! I was just able to get out of the way. THEN the goat ran strait down that hole over there" as Harry points to the hole.
Farmer: "That's impossible, I tied that goat to a railroad tie"

Oldie but a Goodie

Two guys were out fishing on the lake when a hearse and f**... procession passed the boat on a nearby road. One of them stood up and held his fishing hat over his heart as the hearse passed. His buddy commented, "Gee, Harry, that was really nice and respectful!"
To which Harry replied, "Well, after all we were married 40 years."

A joke my mommy told me :)

Once there was a woman sitting in the doctor's office, complaining of incessant gas. She says to the doctor.
"I've been having silent farts all day. I had one in the harris teeter, one in church and...um, one right now."
The doctor replied, "I think you need to get your hearing checked."

So an elderly woman thinks her husband is starting to go deaf...

The woman decides to test her theory. She stands about 30 feet way and calls to her husband:
"Oh Harry!"
She gets no response. She then stands 20 feet away and calls out to him again:
"Oh Harry!"
She is surprised that he STILL doesn't hear her call so she tries again, this time from 10 feet away:
"Oh Harry!"
Harry exclaims: "For the 3rd time Bertha! What do you want!?"

I'm sorry about your parents, but no spell can reawaken the dead, Harry!

Except for the time turner. We'll use that to save Buckbeak.

I said this when I was 6, and everyone laughed

Two twins came to our house one day, and I kept calling them the wrong names (they were their names, but I said Harry to Thomas and vice-versa)
My dad came to me and said 'can't tell them apart, can ya?'
'No dad, I can't tell 'em together!'
(Waits for downvotes)

I just watched Harry Potter for the first time and it was a little unrealistic

I mean, a ginger with two friends?

My wife is an angel.

Bob and Harry are fishing one day....
Bob.... "How's your wife been?"
Harry...."She's an angel, how about yours?"
Bob...."Egh, mine is still alive."

What happened when Harry Potter had s**... with a pig?

He got hog warts.

What's the difference between a Jew and Harry Potter

Warning: Offensive
Harry got out of the chamber.

Order of the Phoenix is my favourite Harry Potter book

Dead serious.

I thought my roommate was joking when he said Gary Oldman was in the Harry Potter movies.

He was dead Sirius.

My favourite part about the Harry Potter movies...

...is the casting.

Why can't Harry Potter tell the difference between his cooking p**... and his best friend?

Because they're both cauldron

Did you hear about the day when Hagrid took Harry, mashed him up, put him in a blender with ice cream and drank him?

Yer a Blizzard, Harry.

Harry Potter movies should be rated R for the huge amount of cursing.

... i can find the door out.

Why was Harry Potter surprised when Ferrari won the F1 race?

Because he expecto'd Petronas.

Rupert Grint bursts into the room, "Mum, I just got a part in the Harry Potter movie!"

"Serious?"
"No, Ron."

Why can't Harry Potter distinguish between his best friend and his p**... in potions class?

They're both cauldron

New secretary

Frank and Harry have been business partners for many years. They had just employed a new secretary and Frank had taken her out.
"How was it?" inquired Harry.
"Fantastic! And i don't mind saying, that she's far better in the cot than my wife."
A couple of weeks later, Harry took the secretary out, and the following morning, he said, "You're right Frank, she is better than your wife!"

Fresh and Funny!

Hey Sue, what do you say to a nice walk?

Oh Harry, that would be lovely!

Wonderful. Could you bring me some beer and cigarettes on your way back?

Why is Harry Potter better than Jews?

He made it out of the chamber.

What's Harry Potter's favorite way to go down a hill?

Walking.
J.K Rowling

Prince Harry and William must feel so awkward in a s**... club

Imagine having to put pictures of your gran into a stripper's bra

I walked into the living room to find my wife breast feeding our son...

"How long do you have to do that for?" I asked. "When is he going to be too old for it?"
"Well, it's a physical bond between a mother and her child isn't it? It's only society that deems it unacceptable above a certain age."
I replied, "Shut up, Harry. I was talking to your mother."

An old Jewish couple, Harry and Sadie, were married for 35 years but never got along...

...One day around this time of year, he says to her, "So? I suppose you'll be wanting a Hanukkah present?"
She says to him, "Harry, I want a divorce."
Harry says, "I wasn't planning on spending that much."

I can't believe Prince Harry, who's British royalty, is marrying African American actress Meghan Markle. Why would someone that rich and famous marry an obviously inferior genetic specimen? It's just unthinkable.

Though I suppose if Meghan wants to marry a ginger, it's none of my business.

My girlfriend is a huge Harry Potter fan

She always wears an invisibility cloak.

I really love Harry Potter, but after re-reading the deathday party, I realized something about Nearly Headless Nick...

He was a very poorly executed character.

Harry Potter woke up in a hospital.

A little confused he asked "where am I?"
Doctor: "why you were in a coma and just awoke in this fine hospital"
"Why am I in a muggle Hospital?" he mumbled to himself
slightly hearing him the doctor spoke " Son, Take it easy, you ran face first into a wall and have been in a coma for 8 years"

Harry Potter walks into a bar

Because it was on his bedroom window

Prince Harry had his Bachelor Party last night in London and here is his "Quote of the Day" from that memorable event:

"It's really weird stuffing money into a stripper's G string when every bill has a photo of your grandmother printed on it."

My girlfriend got really upset when we watched the Harry Potter movies back to back

It isn't my fault I was the one facing the tv

How much does it cost to see Harry Potter fly a broomstick?

About a Quid each.

I finally read Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone.

I know it's only 6 words, but I'm proud of myself.

How does Harry Potter go down a hill?

Walking.
JK ROLLINGGG

Why did Harry Potter throw away all his old potions?

**They were past their hexpiration date!**
*I'm so sorry. My 8yo kid asked me to make up a joke and it's SO HARD to craft a joke that's kid-appropriate.*

Harry was finally a groom and was very excited about his upcoming marriage.

He was on his way out of the office when his boss came over to him.
Congratulations Harry, his boss said. I just wanted to tell you I've been married for 22 years, and I'm sure that you will always remember this day with the fondest of memories, as the happiest day of your life.
But, I'm not getting married until tomorrow, Harry said.
Yeah I know, his boss said.

I found the first four Harry Potter books to be quite light hearted.

The fifth one was dead Sirius.

Harry went into the chamber of secrets with his wand.

When he suddenly felt a strange itch.
This girl...
She had Hogwarts.

I watched the Harry Potter films for the first time at the weekend

They were okay, but a bit unrealistic: a ginger schoolkid with two friends?

Kamala Harris jamaican w**... joke

Reporter: Have you ever smoked w**... ?
Kamala Harris: Half my family's from Jamaica - are you kidding me?
Kamala Harris: I did inhale it !

How did Harry Potter get down the hill?

Running!
JK.... Rowling

Why can't Harry Potter tell the difference between a cooking p**... and his best friend?

They're both cauldron

I liked the Harry Potter books and films but...

I think the character Nearly Headless Nick was a bit poorly executed

A transphobe, a racist, a homophobe and an anti-Semite walk into a bar.

The bartender says Hey, didn't you write those Harry Potter books?

How long will it be before Kamala Harris becomes president?

I don't know, but for now, she's just Biden her time.

Dairy Queen should have had a Harry Potter promotion.

You're a blizzard Dairy.

Joe Biden and Kamala Harris go out for a morning run together

Kamala finishes in just under twelve minutes and Joe is already waiting for her at the finish line.
"How'd you do?" she asks him.
"I finished in 10 minutes and 46 seconds. That's got to be a new record among Presidents, right?"
"No" Kamala replies. "Bush did 9:11."

After having his title stripped and funds cut off by the Royal Family, Harry has taken up painting to supplement his income.

He's the Artist formerly known as Prince.

For my cake day, a Harry Potter joke I made up when I was a kid...

*Knock-knock*
~ Who's there?
~ You know
~ you know who?
*avada kedavra!*
Sorry if everyone knows that one, 7 year old me thought I was being very clever.

Dear Charlie, We've been neighbors for 6 tumultuous years.

When you borrowed my snowblower, you returned it in pieces.
When I was sick, you blasted Metallica.
And when your dog decorated my lawn, you laughed.
I could go on, but I'm not one to hold grudges. So I am writing this letter to tell you that your house is on fire.
Cordially, Harry

Harry Potter Joke

While assembling a new shelf for the wife she instructed me. "Don't mess up the floor!" So I threw down the flatten box with authority and proclaimed, "Protecto Dafloor'um"
The eye rolls for her and the kids were priceless!

I just read harry potter for the first time and i think its a little unrealistic

I mean a ginger with 2 friends??

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these harrying jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.