Harbor Jokes

Harbor jokes abound from those related to Harbor Freight to the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor. Almost everyone can appreciate a good joke about a destroyer going overboard or a harbor master ambushed by a seagull. Check out our selection of the funniest new harbor jokes!

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jokes about harbor

Best Short Harbor Jokes

These are our top harbor puns. Have fun with a good harbor joke in English with simple harbor humour.

  1. With the way I see asian people driving, it got me thinking... Pearl Harbor might have been an accident.
  2. I held a door for an elderly japanese man. He said "Sank you."
    Why did he have to bring up Pearl Harbor like that?
  3. Why does the Norwegian military have barcodes on its ships? So when they return to the harbor they can Scandinavian.
  4. Hey England, you know what oday is? Where's the T?
    We threw it in the harbor, 244 years ago
  5. I just held the door open for an Asian guy. He said, "Sank you," so I punched him in the face. I can't believe he brought up Pearl Harbor like that.
  6. I'm not saying that Asians are bad drivers... But I'm beginning to think that Pearl Harbor was an accident.
  7. Happy Fourh of July "Hey England, Happy Fourh of July."
    "Where's the T?"
    "We threw it in the harbor."
  8. I held a door open for an Asian guy and he said "sank you" so i punched him in the face. Serves him right for bringing up Pearl Harbor like that.
    PS: Happy 4th of July
  9. I held the door for a Japanese man the other day... And he said, sank you.
    So I punched him right in the face.
    I can't believe he'd bring up Pearl Harbor like that.
    Happy Pearl Harbor Day!
  10. I drop kicked a Japanese woman today After holding the door open for her, she said to me "Sank you"
    How dare she bring up Pearl Harbor like that after my nice gesture!
Harbor joke, I drop kicked a Japanese woman today

Make fun with this list of one liners, gags and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor found in these harbor jokes can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of harbor puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, these jokes offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Harbor One Liners

Which harbor dad jokes are funny enough to crack down and make fun with harbor?

  1. Asians are sooo bad at driving.... I'm starting to think Pearl Harbor was an accident.
  2. HAPPY FOURH OF JULY Looking for the T?
    It's in Boston Harbor.
  3. The Bri ish are coming! The Bri ish are coming! Where's the T?
    In the harbor!
  4. Why do British people pronounce it bri'ish? Because the Tea fell in the harbor.
  5. Asian Drivers Are So Bad... that I wouldn't be surprised if Pearl Harbor was an accident
  6. The greatest harbor on Earth can shelter not a single ship... It is truly without pier.
  7. How do you protect yourself from gamma rays and x-rays? You don't bomb pearl harbor.
  8. What do you call two harbors? Paradox!
  9. Where did the 'T' in "British" go? In the Boston Harbor
  10. Why don't British people pronounce their T's? They left them in the Boston Harbor
  11. I prefer my tea American style.. Mixed with the salt of Boston Harbor.
  12. You must be from Pearl Harbor, 'cause baby, you're the bomb.
  13. Why do Americans drink their tea cold? Because it takes too long to boil Boston Harbor.
  14. What did Roosevelt say after the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor? I won't stand for this.
  15. On a scale of 1-10 how enthusiastically did Mitsubishi observe Pearl Harbor day? Zero

Pearl Harbor Jokes

Here is a list of funny pearl harbor jokes and even better pearl harbor puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I held the door open for an old Japanese man today As he walked into the store he said "Sank You". I was shocked that after all these years he still brings up Pearl Harbor…
  • High school laffs In high school once our history teacher asked who bombed pearl harbor, a Japanese kid raised his hand and the teacher said; correct!
  • I was holding the door open for a Japanese guy... The Japanese guy was like "Sank you."
    I punched him dead in the jaw. Smh bringing up Pearl Harbor like that.
  • So I'm holding the door for this Japanese guy... He looks over to me and says "Sank you!" Can't believe he just brought up Pearl Harbor like that.
  • Today I saw a Japanese man rushing to the elevator The door was closing, so I held it open for him.
    He replied with, "Sank you".
    Why did he have to mention Pearl Harbor like that?
  • Titantic is the 2nd highest grossing movie in Japan. Guess since they couldn't sink Pearl Harbor, they went for the next best thing.
  • My grandfather never forgave the Japanese for Pearl Harbor... ...until I explained to him that it was the Americans who made that movie.
  • Asian drivers are so bad that some speculate that Pearl Harbor might have been an accident
  • I once helped an elderly Japanese man cross the street. Afterwards he said, "Sank you." So I punched him in the face.
    He didn't have to bring up Pearl Harbor like that.
  • Why did Japan bomb Pearl Harbor? Because someone asked for supplies
Harbor joke, Why did Japan bomb Pearl Harbor?

Comical Puns & Laughs: Enjoy Fun, Witty Harbor Jokes with Friends.

What funny jokes about harbor to tell and make people laugh ? Check out these list of good jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make harbor prank.

I held the door open for an old Japanese man, and he said "Sank you!"

Being able to understand his heavy accent, I replied "You're welcome."
He laughs and says "No, you misunderstand, I am taunting you about Pearl Harbor."

An elderly Japanese man...

An elderly Japanese man was walking behind me as I was entering a store. Since he was older and walked with a cane, I held the door for him. As he walked pasted he said, "Sank you" with his accent. So I punched him in the face and said, "How dare you bring up Pearl Harbor like that!"

This h**... at the harbor said that she really dug the way that I ate those Oysters.

All I could say was "Shucks."

The joke my grandma told me when i came out

Two gay guys are standing on top of the statue of liberty looking out over the harbor. The first points out a boat and asks "what kind of boat is that?" "Oh that's a barge" replied the other this continued for a while when the first pointed out another and the other replied "that's a ferry ship." the first paused and thought for a moment before replying "i knew we were organized but i didn't realize we had a navy "

It's a good thing the j**... flew planes at Pearl Harbor

If they were driving there would have been a lot more casualties

A Korean and a Jew

Jew: Hey... weren't you people responsible for Pearl Harbor?
Korean: Uh... that was the Japanese. I'm Korean.
Jew: Pffft, Japanese, Chinese, Korean. What's the difference?
Korean: Well wait, weren't you people responsible for sinking the Titanic?
Jew: Uh... that was an iceberg.
Korean: Pffft, Rosenberg, Goldberg, iceberg... What's the difference?

A business man walks down a harbor...

He meets a fisherman, the fisherman offers him 5 fish for free. The business man says "what's the catch?".

I was holding a door open for an Asian Guy.

I was holding a door open for an Asian Guy.
Once he went though, He said, 'Sank you'.
I Swore at him and kicked him in the Shin.
I Then said, 'Never bring up Pearl Harbor like that'

Hey England, Happy Fourh of July!!!

Britain: "What happened to the T?"
America: "We threw it in the Harbor!"

"Guess my nationality" the old man said

Deducing from the man's accent that he was Briish, the other man said so.
"You're correct, but where's the t?" asked the man.
"In the harbor"

When using the equation Y=1-T to understand how citizens react to changes in taxation...what happens when T>1?

Alot of T gets dumped in a harbor

What do you call a Hawaiian pizza with Jalapeños?

A Pearl Harbor

A Jewish guy walks into a bar. The Chinese bartender asks him his name...

"I'm Max Goldberg", he says, "what's yours?"
"I'm Wei Zhang, it's nice to meet you."
Mr. Goldberg says, "I'll never forgive you people for b**... Pearl Harbor."
"I'm Chinese. That was the Japanese."
"Chinese, Japanese, all the same to me."
Mr. Zhang says, "I'll never forgive you people for sinking the Titanic."
"I'm Jewish, that was an iceberg."
"Goldberg, iceberg, all the same to me."

I got so annoyed at my laptop

That I threw it into the harbor.
Now it's basically A Dell Rolling in the deep.

Considering how badly Asians drive, I got to thinking.

Maybe Pearl Harbor was an accident.

What's it called when a man with hemorrhoids farts?

Pearl Harbor

A man runs into an old salty sea captain on the docks of Boston harbor and says,

"Cap'm, can't help but noticin'...you got a steerin' wheel secures to yer c**... there." Sea captain removes the pipe from 'tween his teeth and says, "Aye. It's drivin' me nuts."

Why can't the British properly use all of their T's

The Americans threw most of them in the harbor ( Made this up with my buddy, don't know if it's been said here before )


A Chinese man and his Jewish friend were walking along one day when the Jewish man whirled and slugged the Chinese man and knocked him down.
"What was that for?" the Chinese man asked.
"That was for Pearl Harbor!" the Jewish man said.
"Pearl Harbor? That was the Japanese. I'm Chinese."
"Chinese, Japanese, you are all the same!"
They continued walking and after a while the Chinese man whirled and knocked the Jewish man to the ground.
"What was that for?" the Jewish man asked.
"That was for the Titanic!"
"The Titanic? That was an iceberg."
"Iceberg, Goldberg, you are all the same."

A Barge Carrying Vegetables Sinks In a Harbor...

The disaster report claimed the boat had too many leeks.

If you live near the coast, the harbor is often the best place to go shopping.

They often have really good sails on boats.

A Jewish man and a Chinese man strike up a conversation

Before long they're arguing.
Jewish man: "You know what? I hate you."
Chinese man: "Why?"
Jewish man: "Pearl Harbor!"
Chinese man: "That was the Japanese! I'm Chinese!"
Jewish man: "Japanese, Chinese what's the difference?"
Chinese man: "Well, you know what? I hate you."
Jewish man: "Why?"
Chinese man: "The Titanic!"
Jewish man: "An iceberg sunk the Titanic!"
Chinese man: "Iceberg, Goldberg, what's the difference?"

A speedboat driver crashed and died in a local harbor race yesterday. He died doing what he loved best.


I'm just like Pearl Harbor...

no s**... left...

Did you know that America holds the record for the worlds largest cup of tea?

Its about the size of the Boston harbor.

Scandinavia has a bar code on all of their battleships to keep track of them.....

When the ships enter the harbor, they scan-da-navy-in.

An American is moving to Britain...

...So he decides to learn the british way of spelling things. So he spoke to a Brit he knew and he was told the following:
"So: Color turns into colour. Harbor turns into harbour. honor becomes honour. Starting to notice a pattern?"
So he writes an e-mail to his new boss:
"Good mourning sir....

Did you know that all of the boats in Norway have bar codes on the side?

So when the ships come to harbor they can Scandanavian.

What do you call a burnt Hawaii pizza?

A Peral Harbor

My grandpa is still mad at the Japanese for Pearl Harbor.

I had to explain to him that it was the Americans who made that movie.

My grandfather died in a plane c**....

The United States was pretty mad but I thought Pearl Harbor deserved it.

The Seattle Harbor Enterprise, or SHE, is embroiled in another lawsuit....

They have been charged with illegally surveiling the employees of a net manufacturing company and even tracking them to their homesand even emailing them during non work hours.
So the employees got together and pooled up enough money to raise a lawsuit against the the org for their wrongful actions.
The event is being called the:
"Sue SHE fish net stalking case"

Chinese guy and a Jewish guy sitting at a bar.

Suddenly Jewish guy whacks Chinese guy on the head. What was that for? says the Chinese guy. Pearl Harbor says the Jewish guy. Pearl Harbor? That was the Japanese. Jewish guy says Japanese Chinese what's the difference?
Time goes by. Suddenly the Chinese guy whacks the Jewish guy on the head. What's that for? Sinking of the Titanic. Titanic was sunk by an iceberg. Iceberg Goldberg what's the difference?

A Jewish man and a Chinese man are in a bar. Suddenly, the Jewish man punches the Chinese man in the face.

"Ow! Why did you do that?" asks he Chinese man.
"That's for Pearl Harbor," says the Jewish man.
"But the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor. I'm Chinese!" says the Chinese man.
"Chinese, Japanese, what's the difference?" asks the Jewish man.
So the Chinese man punches the Jewish man.
"Ow! What's that for?" asks the Jewish man.
"It's for the Titanic," says the Chinese man.
"What? That was an iceberg that brought down the Titanic!" says the Jewish man.
"Iceberg, Goldberg, what's the difference?"

My Son's Class Did a Play for the Boston Tea Party.

His teacher told him he would be the tea that was thrown in the harbor. She said he could pick to be any type of tea he'd like. He got so upset that he started running around the class throwing things. I guess he chose to be not tea.

A Chinese man and a Jewish man are sitting next to each other on a plane.

Suddenly, the Jewish man slaps the Chinese man across the face.
"What was that for?" asks the Chinese man..
"For Pearl Harbor" says the Jewish man.
"That was Japanese. I'm Chinese," the Chinese man says.
"Chinese, Japanese" what's the difference?
Few minutes later, the Chinese man slaps the Jewish man.
"What was that for?" asks the Jew.
"It's for the Titanic."
"The Titanic? That was an iceberg..."
"Iceberg, Goldberg, what's the difference?" says the Chinese man.

I heard there's a pretty good Halloween display in the Los Angeles Harbor this year.

Everywhere you look is quite the freight.

A Chinese doctor has a Jewish patient.

"Listen," says the patient, "I didn't think we were going to get along so good together."
"What do you mean?"
"What do I mean! Pearl Harbor, that's what I mean!"
"What are you talking about, Pearl Harbor? I'm Chinese!"
"Yeah, well...Chinese, Japanese, it's all the same thing."
"What do you mean, all the same thing? The Jews sunk the Titanic!"
"The Jews sunk the Titanic?"
"Sure. Greenberg, Goldberg, Iceburg, all the same to me!"

Harbor joke, A Chinese doctor has a Jewish patient.

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like kids and toddlers can enjoy. They can be verbal, as in a play on words, or narrative, often involving a set-up and a punchline. JokoJokes has it all! Jokes in Spanish are also found. Teens are often joking with 4 year olds and 6 year olds. Found out more in our Jokes FAQ section

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The impact of these harbor jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.