The Best 53 Haram Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Haram jokes. There are some haram sharia jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these haram muslim puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Haram Jokes and Puns

contrary to popular belief...

boko haram is not a street fighter character.

Between the Boko Haram schoolgirl abductions and the recent Malaysia Airlines incidents...

I'm starting to doubt if we'll ever see an intact black box ever again.

What does a Boko Haram terrorist become after getting his throat slit?

Boko Halal.

Haram joke, What does a Boko Haram terrorist become after getting his throat slit?

Boko Haram have really had a radical change in direction since their Whiter Shade of Pale days

A Muslim walks into a bar...

Just kidding it's haram

Why aren't there any Muslim feminists?

Pork is haram

Halal in the streets but Haram in the sheets.

stole from a comment thread dont sue

Haram joke, Halal in the streets but Haram in the sheets.

My gf asked me if gorilla meat was forbidden in Islam

My gf asked me if gorilla meat was forbidden in Islam.

I told her, "Yeah, it's haram, bae."

Apparently there's a Ashley Madison clone in the Middle East with a catchy tagline.

Dicks out for Haram bae.

A woman was thinking of revealing her fursona to her islamic boyfriend but wasn't sure if it was ok with his religion, so she asked "Would you like it if I wore a gorilla suit?"

"That's haram, bae."

What did the Muslim Zoophiliac say when he found out his friend was a beekeeper?

"Dicks out for Haram Bee"

You can explore haram cleric reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean haram muhammed dad jokes. There are also haram puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

I'm converting to Islam

for my haram bae

What do the neighbor's wife and a dead gorilla have in common?

They're both haram bae.

I offered my Muslim girlfriend a bite of my gorilla sandwich but she shook her head and said...

"That's haram, bae."

So Harambe walked into a bar

Bartender: What will you be having to drink?
Harambe: I'll have a beer
Me: No, he'll have just ice.
Bartender: Just ice?
Me: Yes, justice for Harambe

What does Harambe order when he goes to a restaurant?

He gets the kids meal.

Haram joke, What does Harambe order when he goes to a restaurant?

A muslim and his wife are chatting during dinner

Wife: Did you hear about the gorilla that got shot in the zoo?
Husband: Wait what are you eating?
Wife: Pork
Husband: Thats haram bae.
Wife: Oh so you did hear about it

Harambe went to a bar

Bartender: What can I get you today?

Harambe: May I get a martini?

Me: Just ice for Harambe.

Harambe: Just ice?

Me: Justice for Harambe.

Why does Harambe confuse bartenders?

All he wants is Just Ice

TIL there is a special kind of honey Muslims cannot eat.

It is made by the Haram Bee.

How much did Harambe drink in the bar?

Just a couple of shots

What is the most forbidden spice in Pakistan?

Haram masala

How are Harambe memes keeping up?

Cincinnati Zoo keeps trying to shoot them down.

I heard ISIS hates gay people so much they put a Fatwa on the entire city of San Francisco

They called it 'A Haram Bay'

What do you call a beach where you go to shoot gorillas and break Islamic law?

Haram Bay

Harambe walks into a bar

Bartender: What can I get for you?

Harambe: Just ice for Harambe.

Bartender: Sorry, we're out of ice. Best I can give you is a shot.

Harambe Memes died just like Harambe himself...

When the little kids jumped in.

A young muslim couple go out hunting and shoot a monkey

The woman asks, "Shall we eat him?"

The man replies, "No, that's haram, bae!"

What do you call an attractive primate corpse in Saudi Arabia?

Haram bae

a muslim couple goes hunting and accidentally shot an ape. "ouch, that's a shame. can we eat him so he wouldn't die in vain?" said the girl. "no, we cant" the guy replied. "why?"

"it's Haram, Bae"

How are Harambe and the iPhone the same?

it only took one extra hole to kill them both

Harambe and Cecil the Lion walk into a bar

Bartender asks, "What'll you have?"

They respond, "Two shots, please."

How many Harambe memes done an average human make a day?

Gorillif I know

Front page here we come?

Harambe is living proof that America will make anyone famous.

Oh wait.

Harambe walks into a bar...

"What'll you have?" says the bar tender

"I'll take a shot." said Harambe

Haven't seen any Harambe memes for a while,

I suppose this means Harambe is dead..

So about Harambe...'s a dead meme.

^^^^I'll ^^^^show ^^^^myself ^^^^out.

Harambe memes have lost their popularity since the election...

People's attention moved away from the death of a gorilla to the election of an orangutan!

Why don't Muslims support Harambe?

Because *haram* it would *be*

So, the Muslim word for sin is haram...

... does that mean a Muslim's sinful girlfriend would be called a... Haram bae?

I'll see myself out.

I figured out why so many Islamic Terrorists hate Americans.

It's because we all have our dicks out for haram babes

What's the difference between a Boko Haram training camp and a Nigerian refugee camp?

I don't know, I just fly the fighter jet.



just so you know it,

there is ham,

in your prophet

Are you aware the the Quran specifically forbids dating Gorillas?

It turns out you're not supposed to have a Haram Bae.

What do you call a primate who loves to eat bacon and make honey?

Haram Bee

What does a Muslim meme lord call his naughty girlfriend?

Haram bae.

Why did Harambe get shot?

Because he was doing some monkey business.

What did the muslim guy say to his girlfriend when she was about to eat gorilla meat?

"That's haram, bae."

Why can't a Muslim date a girl in a Harambe costume?

Because she is a haram bae.

A Muslim Couple decided to spend their day at the zoo.

They stopped at the Gorilla enclosure.

The Girlfriend then said, "The baby gorilla is soooo cute, I want to kiss it"

The Boyfriend then said. "No! That is Haram bae!!"

Harambe and I walk into a bar...

Bartender: What will you be having to drink?

Harambe: I'll have a beer.

Me: No, he'll have just ice.

Bartender: Just ice?

Me: Yes, justice for Harambe.

OFF: This is a repost because Harambe was shot today two years ago. Dicks out for Harambe!

A Muslim guy's girlfriend was killed for eating pork

RIP Haram bae

Boko Haram are great at skin care.

They specialize in blackhead removal

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the haram doda jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working haram shiite piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes