The Best 20 Happy Christmas Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Happy Christmas jokes. There are some happy christmas xmas jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these happy christmas holiday puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Happy Christmas Jokes and Puns

I received a rolex for Christmas from the lesbian couple who live next door.

Now, while I am happy with the gift, I guess they didn`t quite understand what I meant when I told them, "I wanna watch".

A woman walks into a tattoo parlor.

Asking the man in charge to put a picture of a turkey saying "Happy Thanksgiving!" on one thigh and a picture of Santa saying "Merry Christmas!" on the other. The man looked confused by her odd request, so he asked her why. She calmly looked at him and replied without even a stutter. "My husband always complains that there's nothing good to eat between Christmas and Thanksgiving."

At Christmas we all deserve to be happy, so I got a puppy for my wife...

... it was a good trade

Merry Christmas..

Or Happy Heineken, as the case may be ;)

Merry Christmas and Happy Ho idays to friends and oved ones c ose and far. B essings to you and yours this Yu e season.

This is my no-L greeting!


I've just bought my daughter her main toy for Christmas......

I ate the happy meal though.


Que dijo la persona que estaba callendo de un edificio muy muy alto en diciembre?


Feliz gravidad!
(Translation: What did the person falling from the very very tall building in december say?
Happy Gravity!)

Merry christmas and happy new year!

- Internet explorer

What did the blind paraplegic child get for Christmas?

Cancer.

Happy new years folks!

A man goes to the doctors to find a cure for his lack of hearing

The doctor prescribed a hearing apparatus, and scheduled him in for surgery in December.

After the surgery was complete, the man asked the doctor if everything went well. The doctor responded, "everything is fine sir. We've run our tests and you're ready to be discharged. Merry Christmas, and a happy new ear.

Why do Guatemalans make tamales for Christmas?

So they at least have something to unwrap

Happy holidays !

You can explore happy christmas valentines day reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean happy christmas hanukkah dad jokes. There are also happy christmas puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Why do we say Merry Christmas?

We should say Happy 2018th Birthday Jesus!

Did you hear about the happy dyslexic satanists?

They read HE will come on Christmas.

My children want a cat for Christmas...

I normally cook a turkey, but hey, whatever makes 'em happy.

My kids asked for a dog for Christmas.

We usually have turkey, but I'll try to make them happy.

My kids want a cat for Christmas.

We usually have turkey, but hey what ever makes them happy .

My kids wanted a car for Christmas.

I was going to cook a turkey.

But hey, whatever makes them happy.

Got a Christmas card from an eggs benedict...

It read, "Happy Hollandaise".

Do you know why insomniacs are always happy at this time of year?

Because Christmas is only 10 sleeps away.


What's Quentin Tarantino's favorite Christmas Carol?

Django Bells.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you all!

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the happy christmas happy holidays jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working happy christmas fonzie piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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