Happily Ever After Jokes
19 happily ever after jokes and hilarious happily ever after puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about happily ever after that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Happily Ever After Short Jokes
Short happily ever after jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The happily ever after humour may include short happily married jokes also.
- My wife asked what I'd do without her. Apparently "live happily ever after" wasn't the correct answer.
- A prince asked a beautiful princess to marry him.. And she said no.
The prince lived happily ever after. - The World's Shortest Fairy Tale Once upon a time a young man asked the fairest lady in the village to marry him. She looked him up and down and said "No."
He lived happily ever after. - One day a handsome young man proposes to his girlfriend, but she says no. And the man lives happily ever after!
- Bill Cosby runs into prince charming at the bar Cosby says: Son, you can live happily ever after, but only if you don't kiss her.
- If they opened up a massage parlor in Disneyland... Would it be called a "Happily ever after"?
- How many cans of soda can a soda can can if a soda can can can cans? No one can ever know
P.S. are these type of tongue twister jokes allowed here? If not i will happily remove it. - I was promised an hour of body massage with a happy ending. At the end of 60 minutes, they lived happily ever after.
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Happily Ever After One Liners
Which happily ever after one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with happily ever after? I can suggest the ones about fairy tale and happy ending.
- How do we know Cinderella did not have children? She lived happily ever after.
- A couple just got married And they lived happily ever after
Happily Ever After Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about happily ever after you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean happy marriage jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make happily ever after pranks.
A Winking Salesman!
A man with a winking problem applies for a position as a traveling salesman and goes in for an interview.
"Looking at your resume, I can see that you're more than qualified", says the interviewer. "Unfortunately, we can't have our sales reps constantly winking at customers, so we can't hire you", adds the interviewer.
"But wait", says the man. "If I take two aspirin, I stop winking".
"Then show me", replies the interviewer.
So the guy reaches into his pants pocket and pulls out a pile of condoms in all different shapes, sizes, and colours before finally finding a packet of aspirin. He pops the pills and immediately stops winking.
"It's great. You stopped winking", says the interviewer, "but we can't have our salesmen womanizing all over the country".
"What do you mean?", asks the man. "I'm happily married".
"How do you explain all the condoms?" asks the interviewer.
"Oh, that", sighs the man. "Have you ever walked into a pharmacy, winking, and asked for aspirin?"
World's Shortest Fairy Tale
Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?" The girl said, "No!"
And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motocycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and had money in the bank.
The End
Three Army Lieutenants have to cross a river for infantry training.
The first one prays to God and says "Lord give me the strength to cross this river." There is a flash of light and he is granted stronger arms to swim.
The second one says "Lord give me the endurance to cross this river." Another flash of light and he is granted strong lungs to help him swim.
The third one says "Lord, remove this obstacle from my path." There is a flash of light and the young lieutenant turns into a woman. Crossing a Water Obstacle is no longer part of her test and she is applauded by the media for being so strong and independent. She has a loyal group of male followers who dote on her every day and she lives happily ever after.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A middle age guy is walking inside the forest. He saw an old lady on his way....
The old lady told him, "hey there young man, I am a princess from far, far, away land but I've been cursed and the only cure is if someone is going to have s**... with me for an hour, no breaks. I will make you my prince once I got back my identity and we will live happily ever after ". The guy was hesitant but he haven't had s**... in a while and he always wanted to be a prince. He immediately took off his clothes and did just what the old lady told him. After an hour, they were putting back their clothes on and the old lady was still the old lady he was talking to before. The guy asked the old lady, "So, when are you going to turn into a beautiful princess?". The lady asked the guy, "how old are you?" The confused guy replied "I'm 32?".
"And you still believe in fairy tales?", replied the old lady.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Whatever you do, don't step on a duck.
Three guys got into a car c**... and all died. They all get up to heaven and meet St. Peter at the gates. St. Peter said "Okay everyone can come in, but whatever you do don't step on a duck." The gates open and there are ducks everywhere, all over the floor, on tabletops, everywhere.
The first guy walks in and accidentally steps on a duck. St. Peter comes along and handcuffs him to the ugliest woman in all the world and says, "Now you must stay handcuffed for all eternity."
The other two see this and do their best not avoid the ducks. The second guy goes months and months without stepping on any duck. Then one morning he wakes up and as he is getting out of bed he steps on two ducks. St. Peter comes over and handcuffs him to the most atrocious looking and smelling woman and says, "Now you must stay handcuffed to each other for all eternity."
Now the third guy goes years and years and doesn't step on any ducks in all that time. Then one day St. Peter comes along and handcuffs him to the most beautiful woman he as ever seen. St. Peter says, "Now you must stay handcuffed to each other for all eternity." The guy happily says, "Oh my God, what have I done to deserve this?!" And the woman says, "I don't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck."
A kindergarten teacher spent a few minutes each morning teaching a new word to her class.
She would tell the class the word and its meaning, then ask them to come up with a few sentences that included the word for the day.
One day, the teacher said that the word for the day was "frugal."
She explained that frugal had to do with saving, and a frugal person is one who saves.
She then asked the class to come up with a sentence for the word.
The class seemed kind of stumped, and sat there in silence for a few seconds until one little girl raised her hand.
Instead of just a sentence, she came up with a little story:
"There once was a princess who was stuck in a tall tower.
There was a spell on all of the doors, so she couldn’t get out.
One day, she heard a young prince who was walking by and singing.
The princess called out of the tower, 'Frugal me! Frugal me!'
So, the prince frugaled her and they lived happily ever after."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three couples marry and stay at the same hotel for their honeymoons, where they are taken care of by Dave the bellboy.
The first man married a nurse.
Dave thinks to himself, "Nurses are known to be hot to trot."
The second man married a telephone operator.
Dave thinks to himself, "Telephone operators have s**... voices."
The third man married a school teacher.
Dave thinks to himself, "Poor guy, teachers are frigid."
The next morning, Dave reports to work and gets a room service call from the nurse's husband.
He sourly says, "Don't ever marry a nurse. All I heard last night was 'You're not sanitary, you're not sanitary.'"
Then, the telephone operator's husband calls and sourly says, "Don't ever marry a telephone operator. All I heard last night was 'Your three minutes are up, your three minutes are up.'"
Later that afternoon, the teacher's husband calls and happily says, "When you marry, be sure to marry a school teacher. All I heard last night was 'We are going to do this over and over until we get right.'"