Happier Jokes
66 happier jokes and hilarious happier puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about happier that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Are you looking for an uplifting and funny collection of jokes to make you happier than you already are? These jokes have been loved by many, and they're sure to make you cuter, richer, and, most of all, happier.
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Funniest Happier Short Jokes
Short happier jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The happier humour may include short happiest jokes also.
- I asked my wife what she wanted for her birthday. She said, "Nothing would make me happier than diamond earrings." So I got her nothing
- I asked my wife what she wanted for her birthday. She told me that nothing would make her happier than a diamond necklace. So I bought her nothing.
- Wife: I used to be a Christian. Husband: Well that's fine by me
Wife: Thanks, I'm much happier being a Christine now! - My girlfriends birthday is in a week and she said "Nothing would make me happier than a diamond ring!" So I got her nothing
- A man with six kids is always happier than a man with $6 million The man with $6 million always wants more.
- My wife's birthday is in two days, and she told me "Nothing would make me happier than a diamond ring". So I bought her nothing.
- My wife told me "For Valentine's Day, nothing would make me happier than a diamond necklace" So I got her nothing.
- My wife said nothing would make her happier than a diamond necklace. So I bought her nothing.
- How do you prove that your dog loves you more than your wife? Lock them both in the trunk of the car for an hour, then open it up and see which one of them is happier to see you.
- I asked my wife what she wanted for Christmas. She replied, "Nothing would make me happier than a diamond necklace."
So, I brought her nothing.
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Happier One Liners
Which happier one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with happier? I can suggest the ones about healthier and happiness.
- Why are vegetarians happier? They don't have beef with anyone
- Wives are like boats. Happy the day you get one. Happier the day you get rid of it.
- If the punchline was in the title. Mobile users would be much happier.
- I got a sweater for Christmas. I squirter would've made me happier.
- My wife is much happier with a beer inside her. I just wish she'd drink it afterwards.
- Pokémon Go down south. I've never been happier to live in the Bible Belt.
- What's the only thing happier than a 3 legged dog? A 4 legged dog.
- 'You seem happier in summer,' said my wife. I said, 'Well, she's my favourite h**....'
Happier Than Jokes
Here is a list of funny happier than jokes and even better happier than puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- My girlfriend told me "I used to be Christian" "That's fine" I replied "I don't see why that would bother me"
"Good" She said "because I'm so much happier as Christina" - My girlfriend's birthday is in two days. And she told me Nothing would make me happier than a diamond ring .
So I bought her nothing and now she is mad at me for no reason - My girlfriend said nothing would make her happier than a diamond ring for her birthday So I got her nothing
- When I asked my girlfriend what she wanted for Christmas, she said "Nothing would make her happier than a diamond necklace!" So I bought her nothing....
- How do you know a dog is better than a wife? Lock them both in the trunk of your car and see who is happier to see you after an hour when you let them out.
- How to find out who loves you more - your dog or your wife? Easy. Lock them both in a trunk and watch who will be happier to see you after you open it in 15 minutes.
- Why is a dog mans best friend? Lock your dog and wife in a trunk for an hour and see who's happier to see you when you let them out.
- Dogs are truly woman's best friend If you don't believe it, lock your dog and husband in your trunk.
Wait an hour, open it and see who is happier to see you again! - Ever want to find out who is more faithful.... your wife or your dog? lock both in the trunk of your car for 6 hours and watch who is happier to see you when you let them out.
- how can you tell who loves you more: your wife or your dog? Lock them in your car trunk, drive around for an hour or two, open it up and see who is happier to see you.
Cheerful Fun Happier Jokes to Brighten Your Day with Humor and Joy
What funny jokes about happier you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean happy jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make happier pranks.
How do you find out who loves you more, your wife or your dog?
Put them both in the trunk. When you open it, see who's happier to see you.
What's the difference between a wife and a dog?
The later you get home, the happier one is to see you
If you want to understand who loves you more, your wife or your dog, lock them both on the balcony
After three hours unlock them and see who's happier to see you
I couldn't be happier! For the first time in my life a girl told me she loves me.
Aren't moms great?
Nobody's happier about hurricane Irma than Hillary Clinton and Al Gore
It's the only reason their books are flying off the shelves in Florida.
I wanted to buy my girlfriend a ring so I asked her if she would want me to buy her one. She said nothing would make me happier .
So I got her nothing instead .
My darling asked me what I wanted for Xmas, and I said, "Nothing would make me happier than o**... s**...."
So that's what she gave me.
Nothing.
I couldn't be happier with my wife.
As soon as I show any hint of excitement or passion she immediately shuts me down.
I saw biggish girl at the pub last night,
Her t shirt said "watch out I'm a man eater!"
I went up to her and said " excuse me, love ... About your t shirt slogan."
She interrupted me and angrily snapped " oh let me guess: you want to know how many man I've eaten? Well, you know what, I can't help my size."
I said "Actually, no, I wasn't going to say that at all. "
She looks happier and smiled as she said "Oh yes, what did you what to say then?"
"That's not how you spell manatee."
I'm happier and healthier now that I've lost 180 pounds (81.6 kg) of ugly fat!
Thanks Divorce^TM !
I divorced my best friend 10 years ago...
My wife is a lot happier now, but Dave.....Dave's not here
My mom decided she would be happier as a man, so she got a s**... change. We never saw her again.
She's transparent.
Unfortunately, the woman I lost my virginity to died today
On a happier note, I lost my virginity today
I finally landed my dream job as a palaeontologist
It took years of studying and hard work, but I've never been happier.
As I excavated a new find from the ground, a mother and her young son passed by. She pointed at me and told him, "This is why you need to do well at school and get a good job, or else you'll spend the rest of your life digging in a hole just like him."
I have found that I have been happier since I switched from coffee to orange juice.
My Dr. explained that it's the vitamin C and natural sugars but I really think it's the v**....
Top news stories for yesterday
CNN: Trump phone call
MSNBC: Trump phone call
Fox news: Does walking a dog make you happier?
The only people that care about what women wear are women and non-hetero men.
The rest of us would be happier if women wore nothing.
I found I have been happier since I changed from coffee in the morning to orange juice.
My doctor explained that it's the vitamin C and natural sugars , but I really think it's the v**...
I've found that I'm a lot happier
Since I switched from coffee to orange juice in the mornings. My doctor said it's because of the citrus and natural sugars. I think it's just the v**....
I asked my wife what she wanted for our wedding anniversary.
She said nothing would make her happier than a diamond necklace.
So I bought her nothing.
She lied.
I used to put my phone under my pillow so I could feel the alarm
Now I just put it in my pants. I've never woken up happier
A fortune-teller told me that in 10-15 years, I would suffer the most terrible heartbreak any man has ever faced. I was so upset over learning this.
I decided to cheer myself up -- I adopted a puppy, and I've never been happier!
Russian man dies
Russian man die, but for him suffer not over. Man very wicked, and go to h**.... There devil make punish: he burn in lake of fire. Is warm. Russian man finally happy.
So devil make lake hotter. But Russian man now is warmer. Now is happier.
Devil get very frustrate. So devil make fire lake into ice lake--lake cold as million Russian winter. But Russia man now happiest of all!
"Devil!" he say, "h**... is freeze! Russia is finally happy country!"
But is not true. Is only story.
Also, man not in h**..., only Russia.
Bull
A week after John bought a bull, he complained to his friend, All that bull does is eat grass. Won't even look at a cow.
Take him to the vet, his friend suggested.
The next week, John is much happier. The vet gave him some pills, and the bull serviced all of my cows! he told his pal. Then he broke through the fence and bred with all my neighbor's cows! He's like a machine!
What kind of pills were they? asked the friend.
I don't know, but they've got a peppermint taste.
