Handbook Jokes
8 handbook jokes and hilarious handbook puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about handbook that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Discover the funny side of employee handbooks with our collection of jokes from around the world. Whether you're looking for a classic manuel joke or a hilariously funny textbook joke, we've got it all. Laugh out loud with our handbook jokes today!
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Comical Handbook Jokes and Gems that Will Get You in Laughter Land
What is a good handbook joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A magician says to his audience...
A magician says to his audience "I can make myself appear in 100 different places in this room". He says "3, 2, 1, Abracadabra!" Nothing happens so he tries once again, "3, 2, 1, Abracadabra!" Still nothing happens. Flustered he asks to be excused while he checks his handbook. He closes the book and says " Sorry, I've been saying the wrong magic word, 3, 2, 1, Allahu Akbar!" Needless to say his audience was blown away.
A journalist tries to find out how different professions deals with basic math.
So he asks them a simple question: "How much is 1+1?"
The mechanical engineer quickly opens a handbook and say, the handbook says 2, let's make it 3 just in case.
The physicist starts scribbling and after 5 minutes say it's between 1.95 and 2.05 within 3 sigma confidence level.
The mathematician start writing formulas and within half an hour he announces he can prove that there is a solution.
The lawyer takes the journalist to the side and whispers, how much do you want it to be?
What do you call the "Alternative Facts Handbook"?
The Bible
A Russian officer is giving his cadets a lesson about chemistry.
He says: "Cadets, write down: the temperature of boiling water is 90°."
One of the privates replies, "Comrade praporshchik, you're mistaken — it's 100°!"
The officer consults his handbook, and then announces, "Right, 100°. It is a *right angle* that boils at 90°."
Tell a man a joke, he will laugh for a day.
Tell a resistor a joke, he'll tell you what number it is in the joke handbook.
Four cops had to take a test...
They were all asked the same question:
"What would you do if a man with a knife was coming at you?"
The Cop from the U.K answered by listing the steps in order what he was taught to do in Police Academy and in the Police Handbook
The Cop from the U.S Answered:
"BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG"
The Cop from Japan answered:
"Disarm the man and arrest him using any form of martial arts that is best suited"
The Cop from Canada answered:
"Please put the knife down."
I read the Archer's Handbook recently...
"When it comes to arrows, quality is preferable to quantity. A well-made arrow goes a long way".
BAILIFF: do you swear to tell the whole truth and nothing but the... ME: no
JUDGE: [flipping through law handbook] what do we do if he says no?
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