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Halo Jokes

39 halo jokes and hilarious halo puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about halo that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Looking for some laughs? Check out our collection of hilarious Halo jokes! From jokes about the Covenant to jokes about the Flood, we've got something for everyone!

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Funniest Halo Short Jokes

Short halo jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The halo humour may include short halibut jokes also.

  1. Why did Jesus lose his Halo? Nobody wanted to play on his team any longer after he had a 0 and 2 kill/death ratio and it took him 3 days to respawn.
  2. If Gravemind from Halo did product placement... We exist / Together now
    Two corpses / In one grave
    Burma-Shave
  3. I don't understand why anyone would play past the first Halo game. Once you've played the first game, you've seen The Maw.
  4. In heaven Mother Theresa is complaining to god that Princes Diana's halo is bigger than hers... God giggles... That's not a halo, that's a steering wheel.
  5. What hymn did the snarky gamer suggest for Sunday mass? The Halo: Combat Evolved theme song.
    Everyone rejoiced.
  6. What do you get when a Petty officer from Halo has got some mad cooking skills? Masterchef
  7. Bungie is now working on food products based on their own classic games Known as Halo tea bags.
  8. What do you call a religious door-to-door salesman? A zeal-ot.
    (bonus points if this made you think of the Halo games)
  9. Microsoft has realized that all their products get better PR by naming it after Halo mythology. I'm expecting the next Windows version to be Windows 117.
  10. What did the big angel say to the little angel on Christmas Eve?
    Answer: "Halo there!"

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Halo One Liners

Which halo one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with halo? I can suggest the ones about halal and battlefield.

  1. What has two wings and a halo? A Japanese phone,
    Wing wing, "Halo?"
  2. What has two wings and a halo? A chinese man on the phone! Wing wing, halo?
  3. What has two wings and a halo? An Asian phone call; "Wing, Wing, Halo!?"
  4. If Gordon Ramsey were in Halo… would it make him masterchef?
  5. What has two wings and a halo? A Chinese telephone. Wing-Wing. Halo.
  6. What has two wings and a halo? A Chinese telephone.
  7. Why didn't Bungie stick with Halo? Because it wasn't their Destiny.
  8. what is an angel's favorite video game? halo
  9. What's bigger than Infinity? Halo
  10. How much does Halo cost? six million jews
  11. How do gamers greet each other? "Halo"
  12. What's Lionel Richie's favorite video game? Halo.
  13. When you insult Chuck Norris, the next thing you are going to see is a bunch of halos.
  14. What does the Sun say a lot? Halo to you.
  15. A sky high Ground Pound in Halo 5 Should be a medal called "From the Top Rope!"

Halo 3 Jokes

Here is a list of funny halo 3 jokes and even better halo 3 puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Microsoft has developed a special version of the Halo 3 rendering engine which can run within LibreOffice Calc spreadsheets... It's called Halo3.**ods**t
Halo joke, Microsoft has developed a special version of the Halo 3 rendering engine which can run within LibreO

Halo joke, Microsoft has developed a special version of the Halo 3 rendering engine which can run within LibreO

Uproarious Halo Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time

What funny jokes about halo you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean hallow jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make halo pranks.

I used to be a halogen

Then I took a proton to the Ne.

A man dies and goes to heaven

He sees Saint Peter, and starts to tell him a joke
"Masterchief and Cortana walk into a bar.."
Saint Peter cuts him off
"Is this about Halo?"
"Yeah"
"Don't bother, its just going to go over my head"

So MotherTeresa is in heaven, but...

she notices that Princess Diana has a bigger halo than her. So Mother Teresa goes to God and asks why Princess Diana has a larger halo. God laughs and responds, "Oh, that's not a halo, that's the steering wheel."
My grandmother told me this joke, all credit to her.

Mother Theresa goes to Heaven

Mother Theresa walks through the pearly gates and sees princes Diana. She asks the angel Gabriel..."Hey...I spent my whole life working to help others...why does Diana have a halo and I dont?" Gabriel answers..."That's not a halo...that's a steering wheel"
Too soon?

Princess Diana and Mother Theresa are in Heaven

when Mother Theresa notices that Princess Diana has a bigger halo than she does.
She asks God, "Why does the Princess Diana get a bigger halo than me, she was a great person but I helped so many more people. I should at least have the same size halo as her"
God replies, "That's not a halo, it's a steering wheel"

What do you get when you cross a s**... with a halo nerd?

Masterchief

Halo joke, What hymn did the snarky gamer suggest for Sunday mass?