The Best 14 Hallmark Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Hallmark jokes. There are some hallmark insignia jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these hallmark stamp puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Hallmark Jokes and Puns

What has 27 actors, three settings, two writers, and one plot?

671 Hallmark movies.

My granddad used to say "Pick a card, any card."

He was the laziest employee Hallmark ever had…

A guy walks in to a Hallmark Store.......

And asks the attendant:

Do you have a valentine's card that says: "Our love is unique, I love you with all my heart, you are the love of my life"?

Attendant says: How romantic,
Sure, We do have some.

The guy says: can I get 3 of those please.

Hallmark joke, A guy walks in to a Hallmark Store.......

Bob's anniversary

Bob was out fishing when he realized that it was his wedding anniversary. Hoping to save face, he headed to shore. He left the marina and started driving to the nearest Hallmark store to buy his wife a card and a gift. His truck's engine started sputtering and died on the road.

Bob was fairly mechanical, so he figured he could fix the problem. He couldn't. Just to top it off, his cell phone was dead. and he couldn't call for help.

He slowly began to realize that he was stuck between a dock and a card place.

If brand slogans were honest...

Hallmark: When you care enough to give a card mass-produced by 
a corporation.

Ritz crackers: Tiny, edible plates.

CliffsNotes: They're still going to know you didn't read the book.

Gillette: We're just going to keep adding blades.

ChapStick: You'll misplace it before the tube's empty.

Hot Pockets: Every bite is a different temperature.


Today I got 150 Valentines cards, I was totally shocked and breathless

The security guard at Hallmark gave quite a chase!

At the Hallmark store

"Do you sell sympathy cards?" I asked at the Hallmark store.

"Yes we do." replied the clerk.

"Good," I said, "could I exchange this 'Get Well Soon' card for one?"

Hallmark joke, At the Hallmark store

Lori Loughlin was fired from Hallmark channel...

...They sent her a card. "Best wishes for your college experience."

What does the H. in Jesus H. Christ stand for?

Hallmark. God cares enough to send the very best.

I got kicked out of a hallmark store in vegas

I was counting cards

I just got over 15 Valentines cards! It left me breathless...

The security guard at the Hallmark store gave quite a chase.

You can explore hallmark distinctive reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean hallmark trademark dad jokes. There are also hallmark puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


I think the people at Hallmark got some of the important aspects of movies and school mixed up...

...you usually only use formulas for math.

I think the people at Hallmark got some of the aspects of good movies confused.

You usually use formulas for math.

I have been thinking about getting into writing cards for Hallmark. Here is the first go: outside Get well

Inside: Hung! Happy Gender Reassignment Surgery!

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the hallmark brand jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working hallmark rus piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes