Gynecologist Jokes
121 gynecologist jokes and hilarious gynecologist puns to laugh out loud. Read professions jokes about gynecologist that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Who said the realm of gynecology couldn't share a rib-tickler or two? Our quest for humor often has us scouring the corners of the paradoxical and the unexpected, making gynecologist jokes a thrilling avenue worth exploring. These jokes bring about a different kind of mirth, particularly in circumstances when an atmosphere of ease is much needed.
Whether it's the witty 'gynecologist joke about reading lips', the surprisingly amusing deaf gynecologist joke, or the humorously ironic blind gynecologist joke, the ability to laugh in unexpected contexts can be refreshing. For those who prefer their humor on the lighter side, we've also assembled a collection of clean OBGYN jokes that are certain to please.
These gynecologist jokes, apart from providing a good laugh, also serve to ease discussions surrounding the profession, positively impacting sentiment, and broadening views on what is a vastly important, yet often misinterpreted field. So, brace yourself for a laughter-filled journey that is both entertaining and perfectly suited for almost any context.
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Funniest Gynecologist Short Jokes
Short gynecologist jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The gynecologist humour may include short gynaecologist jokes also.
- You know when you get the urge to eat something just because it's there? Anyways, I lost my job as a gynecologist today.
- What's the difference between a genealogist and a gynecologist? A genealogist looks up the family tree, a gynecologist looks up the family bush. (Credit to my uncle)
- What do a pizza delivery driver and a gynecologist have in common? They both get close enough to smell the goods but if they eat it they'll be in trouble.
- I've got a friend who's a female private investigator. Or gynecologist, as she likes to be called.
- What's common between a Game Tester and Gynecologist. They both look for problems in places where other men find pleasure.
- My friend always tells everyone that he's a private investigator, but within our group of friends we know he's just a gynecologist.
- One time I wanted to get a job as a gynecologist.... Unfortunately, I couldn't find any openings.....
- I wanted to be a gynecologist, but I failed medical school in the last semester. I was so close I could taste it.
- What not to ask a gynecologist when seeking dating advice. What do you look for in a woman?
- I asked my gynecologist what he looks for in a girl. He told me he's married and to stop coming to his house.
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Gynecologist One Liners
Which gynecologist one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with gynecologist? I can suggest the ones about obstetrician and female doctor.
- What do a dog and a nearsighted gynecologist have in common? A wet nose.
- Did you hear about the deaf gynecologist? He had to read lips.
- Ever heard of the blind gynecologist? He could read lips
- Small town gynecologists... I bet they spend a lot of time looking up old friends.
- I'm not a gynecologist, but I'm willing to take a look.
- Gynecologists and midwives are good at telling jokes It's all about the delivery.
- What's the worst thing about being a gynecologist? You can't eat on the job.
- What profession is it important to know how to read lips? A gynecologist.
- I love being a gynecologist I find that I'm always hard at work.
- What's the best way to freak out your gynecologist? Become a ventriloquist
- Why did the woman marry her gynecologist? He checked a lot of boxes.
- Where do Gynecologists get their training? ...
...
...
Private School - Why did the gynecologist get taken in for questioning? He smelled a little fishy.
- Who was Princess Leia's gynecologist? OB-Wan Kenobi
- I asked my gynecologist what the medical term for queefing is... Twatulence.
Blind Gynecologist Jokes
Here is a list of funny blind gynecologist jokes and even better blind gynecologist puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Did you hear about the gynecologist that looked up his old girlfriend? He was blinded by the gorgon's eye.
- What's the good thing about a blind gynecologist? They can double as your proctologists
Cheerful Gynecologist Jokes for Unforgettable Laughter with Friends!
What funny jokes about gynecologist you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean urologist jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make gynecologist pranks.
Q: What's the difference between a genealogist and a gynecologist?
A: The genealogist checks the family tree and the gynecologist checks the family bush.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands.
On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a v**...."
"What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married 10 times?"
"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative. He kept telling me how great it was going to be.
Husband #2 was in software services. He was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.
Husband #3 was from field services. He said everything checked out diagnostically, but he just couldn't get the system up.
Husband #4 was in telemarketing. Even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
Husband #5 was an engineer. He understood the basic process, but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
Husband #6 was from finance and administration. He thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
Husband #7 was in marketing. Although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.
Husband #8 was a psychologist. All he ever did was talk about it.
Husband #9 was a gynecologist. All he did was look at it.
Husband #10 was a stamp collector. All he ever did was... God! I miss him!
But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"
"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"
"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm going to get s**...."
Depressed race car mechanic.
Scene: a psychiatrists practice:
'Doc, I'm a mechanic I work for a racecar driver. It's utterly depressing ... I get to fix his car up, maintain it, tune it to perfection. But never -not once- have I been allowed to take it for a spin. It's crushing a depressing to think that such a wonderful thing is out there purring, but I'll never get to enjoy it. ...'
'Well sir, I think I understand just fine, my brother in law has the exact same problem.'
'Is he a mechanic too doc?'
'No, a gynecologist'
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So an old Nun goes to the gynecologist...
...for her normal check up. The doctor checks her out, and tells her the bad news. "Sister, I hate to tell you this, but you've got c**...." With a look of panic on her face, she says "That's impossible, I've never been with anyone! Can you look again?" Reluctantly, the doctor agrees to have another look. After a second check, the doctor looks up and says, "Sorry sister, they're not c**.... They're fruit flies, your cherry's gone bad!"
A Gynecologist walks into an exam room
Gynecologist walks into an exam room. The woman on the exam table shows the doctor two strange green dots, one on each inner thigh. Puzzled at first, the doctor examines them more closely. He then asks the woman "Would you happen to be a lesbian?" The woman answers "Why, yes, but I don't see what that has to do with these dots!" The doctor replied.. "Tell your girlfriend to get some REAL gold earrings!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Blonde at the doctor's office
A gorgeous blonde pays a visit to a gynecologist. She undresses and lays down waiting for the doc. The doc enters the room and he's mesmerized by her beauty, totally loses his mind, and soon, starts having s**... with her.
She's quiet and not responsive, and the doc asks: You do realize what I'm doing, right?
She says: Of course, taking out my h**....
Why did the gynecologist giggle during the pap smear?
I don't know. It was an inside joke.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A blonde goes to her gynecologist...
A blonde goes to her gynecologist and tells the doctor that no matter how hard she and her husband have tried, she just can't get pregnant.
The doctor says, OK, t**... clothes and lay down on the table.
The blonde says, Um, all right. But I was really hoping to have my husband's baby.
A trip to the dentist
A woman walks into a dentist's office, sits down in the chair, pulls down her pants and spreads her legs. The dentist says to her, "I think you've got the wrong place. The gynecologist's office is upstairs." The woman says back, "No mistake. You put my husband's dentures in, and now you're gonna get them out."
Yeah, did you hear about the really chatty snake gynecologist?
Well, he was good at his job, but I just couldn't stand how he kept sticking his head in my business.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A couple of newlyweds on were on their honeymoon and moments before the passionate love making commenced, the wife says to the husband, "Please, be gentle, I'm still a v**...."
The husband was shocked and replied, "How's this possible? You've been married *three* times before!"
The wife responds, "Well, my first husband was a gynecologist and all he wanted to do was look at it. My second husband was a psychiatrist and all he wanted to do was talk about it. Finally, my third husband was a stamp collector and all he wanted to do was...oh, *god*, I miss him!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Jacob's 5th birthday. He wants to be a doctor as his parents.
5th birthday of Jacob who wants to be a doctor as his parents.
His mom is a 'Ear Nose And t**...' doctor. His father is gynecologist. Guests approach Jacob with gifts asking if he want to be a 'Ear Nose And t**...' doctor as his mom or a gynecologist as his dad. Jacob thought about it a little then said: I want to be gynecologist. Why would you, they asked in astonishment. Cause I have no idea about ears and noses. Jacob replied.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man from Oklahoma takes his daughter to the gynecologist...
He tells the doctor that he'd like to put her on birth-control pills. The doctor asks him how old she is.
"She's thirteen." the man says.
The doctor is somewhat startled, "That's seems a bit young, is she s**... active?"
The man replies, "Naw... she jus' lays there like 'er mother."
I went to my new male Gynecologist and he said to spread my legs so that he could numb it down there. So he went down and went
numnumnumnumnumnum
The appointment.
Jack wakes up one morning next to Jill. He's feeling amorous and starts caressing her and tugging at her pyjama bottoms. She groans and says, "oh... not now, honey. You know I have a gynecologist appointment this morning...." Jack rolls over resignedly. After a few minutes he turns back toward her and says, "umm... you don't have a dentist appointment, do you?"
A gynecologist decides to make a career change...
He always loved cars, and because he made so much money, salary really didnt matter to him. He decides to become a mechanic. He approaches his local shop and inquires about a job. "You need to get certified first" says the head mechanic, "ill give you the test myself, in the shop."
The doctor studies day and night and finally feels ready for his practical exam.
He comes in and is asked to fix the transmission and engine of a beaten down, old car.
After the test, he is seated in the office and the head mechanic comes in.
"Congratulations doctor, you scored 150 out of 100 points"
"im confused" the doctor says, "how did i get 150 out of 100"
"well..." the mechanic says "you fixed the engine perfectly, so thats 50. You also fixed the transmission perfectly, for another 50"
"Great! But where did the last 50 come from?"
"I gave you a bonus. You did it all through the exhaust pipe"
What do you call a doctor who is trained in neurosurgery and is covering for a gynecologist?
A pervert.
Gynecologists don't have to travel to study abroad.
Why was John Lennon shocked when he got his wife's gynecologist bill?
He had misunderstood the doctor when he said "I do probe Ono."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The local Cardiologist just died.
And everyone showed up at the f**... with hearts. Hearts of all kinds were put on his casket.
Little Johnny says "Boy, I'm not gonna miss the Gynecologist's f**...!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
why do females love old gynecologists...
because of their shaky fingers
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Wife comes back from the doctor and says to her husband: - Honey, I have a sad news - a gynecologist told me not have s**... for a three weeks...
Husband: And what did the dentist say?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
"Can we have s**... today" asks a poor husband, in anticipation!
Wife : No!!My gynecologist told me not to have s**... for 2 weeks.
Husband: Yeah! But your dentist didn't!!
As a couple gets into bed, the husband starts to rub and kiss his wife.
She turns over and says, "I'm sorry, honey. I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow, and I want to stay fresh." The husband sadly turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife. "Do you have a dentist appointment, too?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a deaf gynecologist?
A lip reader.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What did the Medieval Gynecologist say to his patients?
At your c**..., m'lady
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My wife told me "My gynecologist says I can't have s**... for two weeks"
I said "And what did your proctologist say?"
Justin Beiber fell off stage last night at a concert in Canada.
He suffered only minor injuries according to his gynecologist.
What do you call a software developer who's also a gynecologist?
Front-end
joke of the day
A question on an internet forum:
Q: Please help, I have this great itching between my toes.
A: Well, that depends. If the itching is between all toes, consult a dermatologist. If the itching bothers you only between your two big toes, consult a gynecologist.
I need you to be open with me...
...Said the gynecologist to the psychiatrist
I asked my Gynecologist about a Job
She said they had a few openings
At the Hotel Bar...
A man was sitting at a hotel bar, when a group of men sat down next to him and ordered a round of drinks.
"You guys with a convention?"
"Yes, we're with the Gynecology conference"
"Really? I was this close" he holds up his finger and thumb about an inch apart "to becoming a Gynecologist."
"So what did you end up doing?"
"I'm a proctologist."
My friend told me he texts me while he's in between patients
He's a gynecologist
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a gynecologist who really loves his job?
o**... Enthusiastic
What's the similarity between a pizza delivery guy and a gynecologist?
They both work with crust.
This doctor is so lucky
An E.N.T. Professor retired from college. In the farewell college faculty
gifted him a silver ear.
Thanking the faculty the professor said: Thank god I am not a gynecologist.
Three doctors are talking about death
The first, a dentist, says, When I die, I think I'd like my tombstone to be shaped like a tooth made of white marble.
Hey, adds the cardiologist, that's not a bad idea, I'd love my tombstone to be shaped as a heart…
The gynecologist is silent for a bit, then says, I think scattering of the ashes is my option.
When I was younger I used to want to be a gynecologist...
But then I looked into it.
My grandmother went to a gynecologist to check on hey cervical cancer.
The doctor says to my grandmother: "Now, Mrs. Smith, I'm going to insert my finger..."
My grandmother replies: "Can you put in two? I want a second opinion."
Husband and wife get into bed for sleeping
And the husband turns to wife and starts making out.
Wife says "don't start now, I have a gynecologist appointment tomorrow morning so I need to keep it clean".
Husband disappointed, rolls around and tries to go to sleep.
In a few minutes, he rolls back and asks "do you have a dentist's appointment tomorrow too?"
The doctor is in.
Being a gynecologist brings a whole new meaning to the phrase "The doctor is in".
Private investigator
(At a fancy diner with wife and her friend)
Wife's friend: So, what do you do for a living?
Me: I'm a private investigator
Wife: Kieth, you're allowed to say gynecologist
Me: People are eating, Linda!
How many gynecologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
I'm asking because mine had to call like six other guys in to help him, and I'm really starting to wonder why I needed one installed down there in the first place.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a m**... gynecologist?
A Box Elder.
My first husband was a gynecologist ...
My first husband was a gynecologist.
All he wanted was to look.
My second husband was a philatelist.
My God, do I miss him.
In a room full of doctors how do you recognize the gynecologist ?
It's the one with the watch on his elbow
What do dentists and gynecologists have in common?
They both start by saying "open wide!"
They usually don't punish a doctor for losing a patient
But they immediately fired me, being a gynecologist is difficult.
I once knew a guy who went to school to become a surgeon, but he lost his bottom two fingers in an accident
Now he's a gynecologist
What's the difference between a hired detective and a Gynecologist?
Ones a Private Investigator, the others a Privates Investigator
A lady goes to a gynecologist for a routine exam
She gets into the gown and positions herself into the stirrups. When the doctor comes in, he tells her that the exam may be painful and asked if she would like to be numbed. Afraid of the pain, she replies, please. The doctor says okay, this will just take a minute . The doctor puts on his gloves, lifts up her gown, begins to put his head between her legs and goes numb numb numb numb...
Man says to his wife, "How about a bit tonight then?"
Wife replies, "Not tonight, I'm having a check-up with my gynecologist tomorrow and I want to be all nice and clean and fresh."
Man says, "You're not going to the dentist as well though, are you?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do women prefer older Gynecologists?
Their shaky hands!
What do you call a gynecologist who's good at their job?
A vagician.
My dad got fired for taking me to work.
Apparently, Bring Your Kid to Work Day doesn't apply to gynecologists!
You know that urge to eat something just because it's there?
That's why I'm not a gynecologist.
What does a gynecologist have in common with a census taker?
They both make their living checking boxes.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between a pickpocket and a gynecologist?
**A pickpocket snatches watches...**
What do you call an exam at a Jewish gynecologist?
A pap schmear !
What's the difference between a DJ and a gynecologist ?
None : they both work where others have fun.
Why did this gynecologist become a millionaire ?
He got Parkinson.
