Guitar Jokes

• Short Guitar Jokes
• Guitar One Liners
• Guitar Playing Jokes
• Play Guitar Jokes
• Guitar Strings Jokes
• Guitar Player Jokes
• Guitar Pick Jokes
• More Guitar Jokes

Funniest Guitar Short Jokes

Short guitar jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The guitar humour may include short music instruments jokes also.

1. A friend gave me a free guitar the other day, but I've been having trouble playing it I guess I can't complain though, it's not often someone just gives you something with no strings attached
2. My wife rotates playing her guitar, drum, or flute once a month. It's part of her minstrel cycle.
3. A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. judge asks, "First offender?" She replied: "No, first a Gibson, and then a Fender."
4. What is the difference between a guitar player and a savings bond? The savings bond will eventually mature and earn money.
5. A woman is arrested for beating her husband up with his guitar collection. The judge asked "First offender?"
   The wife answered "No. First a Gibson. Then a Fender"
6. For sale: Guitar
   Yoyo
   puppet
   Kite
   £5 for the lot
   Genuine reason for sale
   No strings attached
7. This guy said he was going to hit me with the neck of a guitar.... I said, Is that a fret?
8. A woman is accused of attacking her husband with several of his guitars The Judge asked "First time offender?"
   She replied, "No, first time a Gibson, then a Fender."
9. I was carrying my ukulele in its case at school and my friend asked, "You play an instrument?". I replied, "Yeah, I play a little guitar."
10. Just had a guy threaten to attack me with the neck of a guitar I asked him, "Is that a fret?"

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Guitar One Liners

Which guitar one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with guitar? I can suggest the ones about musical instrument and piano.

1. I was cleaning one of my finger guns. I accidentally blew a hole through my air guitar.
2. My girlfriend asked if I could play wonderwall on the guitar. I said "maybe".
3. My friends are like my guitar. I don't have a guitar...
4. What did the guitar and banjo name their daughter? amanda Lynn
5. What's the fastest way to make money as a guitarist? By selling your guitar.
6. What did al gore play on his guitar? An algorithm.
7. Someone said they'd attack me with the neck of their guitar... "Is that a fret?"
8. I used to be ugly, but then I bought an acoustic guitar Now I'm ugly and annoying
9. I'm about to reveal a secret to being an excellent guitar player Stay tuned
10. What is God's favorite guitar chord? Gsus
11. What's the difference between a guitar player and a couch? A couch can support a family.
12. How do you get a guitar player to shut up? Put sheet music in front of him
13. I always keep my guitar in my car It's good for traffic jams
14. How do you protect your accordion from being stolen? Put it in a guitar case.
15. Do you want to know the secret of making your guitar sound better? If so, stay tuned.

Guitar Playing Jokes

Here is a list of funny guitar playing jokes and even better guitar playing puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• A woman approaches me as I'm playing my guitar. "Excuse me, is that a Squier Stratocaster?" I may have overreacted when I responded: "DID YOU JUST ASSUME MY FENDER?!"
• My friend's worried he's addicted to playing guitar I told him not to fret but he says he can't help it
• Why are accordions better than guitars? You can play both melody and harmony at the same time, so you don’t need any friends.
• What does former Vice President Gore play on the guitar? An algorithm
• I got kicked out of band camp for trying to play a guitar with a bow. They said I violated it.
• Piracy is killing the music industry I mean, have you tried playing guitar with a hook?
• Q: What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?
  A: You can tune a guitar, but you can't tuna fish.
• When playing the guitar in public... keep in mind not to finger A minor, you could get arrested.
• I'm learning how to play the neurotic guitar. It's a lot like an acoustic guitar but it's a little more high strung.
• No matter where I go, I like to bring my ukulele, then, whenever someone asks if I play an instrument, I say... I play a little guitar!"

Play Guitar Jokes

Here is a list of funny play guitar jokes and even better play guitar puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• My friend told me he's worried about his guitar playing addiction. I told him don't fret.
• I always thought about playing the guitar But there were just too many strings attached
• A guitar player was panicking because he couldn't play his open strings His instructor told him don't fret
• What do chemists say when they wanna play a song at guitar? "Anyway, here's van der Waal."
• I sold my guitar to a man with no arms I said to him "How will this work?"
  And he replied "I'm not sure, I'll play it by ear"
• If your playing the guitar just remember one thing Dont finger a minor you could get arrested for that.
• I was at a party playing guitar once and somebody asked me if I could play Wonderwall
  I said maybe
• Me, neighbor and cops are making a band I play electric guitar, Cops are playing drums on the door and neighbor sings outside the window.
• What did the mathematician play on his guitar? An algo-rhythm
• What type of guitar does a pigeon play? A-coo-stick.

Guitar Strings Jokes

Here is a list of funny guitar strings jokes and even better guitar strings puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• "Tell me what you want." I whispered, as I slid my finger up and down her G string… She said, "I want my guitar back."
• What did the guitar at the music store say to the customer browsing through their selection of stringed instruments? "Pick Me!! Pick Me!!!!!"
• A little guitar humor I broke a g-string trying to finger A minor
• What's the difference between Netflix and a Bass guitar? Netflix has Stranger Things 4 and a Bass guitar has 4 Strange Strings.
• I'm selling a guitar for £5 No strings attached.
• What does a stripper and a guitar have in common? The G-String is always going off.
• Walking down the street today someone handed me a free air guitar... No strings attached...
• I got a pretty sweet deal at a music shop for a vintage guitar Should've known it came with strings attached
• I once met a very misfortunate polyamorous musician He was in a no strings attached relationship with his guitar.
• Just bought a guitar. The sale felt a little dodgy, lots of strings attached.

Guitar Player Jokes

Here is a list of funny guitar player jokes and even better guitar player puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb? Ten: one to screw it in and nine to say, "Pssh, I can do that."
• What do you call a guitar player without a girlfriend? Homeless
• How many guitar players does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2 . One to screw it in and another to say, "I could do that".
• Why was the guitar player jailed? He fingered A minor
• What is the difference between a guitar player and government bonds? Government bonds mature over time and earn money
• Imma slap the F out of you... Said the bass player to his bass guitar
• What do you call a prejudiced 4 stringed guitar player? A racist bassist
• How do you get a guitar player to turn down his amp? Give him sheet music.
• Why are guys always looking at girl guitar players? They're checking out their G-Strings
• Guitar players are actually quite a religious bunch... They've all found Gsus at some point.

Guitar Pick Jokes

Here is a list of funny guitar pick jokes and even better guitar pick puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Did you hear about the autistic guitar pick? He's a plectrum on the spectrum.
• I'm OK at guitar but I can't pick up the piano.
• I went to the doctor and said my family are all sick of me playing the guitar He said, if you keep picking it they won't ever get well.
• When I finally found the perfect guitar plectrum... I knew it was a good pick.
• Was at a party the other day, there was a guitar there. I picked it up and someone asked if I could play wonderwall I said maybe
• I like my women like I like my guitar picks Thiccc
• Why do girls fall for guitar players? They have good picks
• Chuck Norris killed the devil and is selling his own line of Picks of Destiny, available in all Chuck Norris approved guitar shops.

Charming Humor Guitar Jokes with Loads of Fun

What funny jokes about guitar you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean saxophone jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make guitar pranks.