The Best 81 Guitarist Jokes

Following is our collection of funniest Guitarist jokes. There are some guitarist musician jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these guitarist fret puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Funny Guitarist Jokes and Puns

The Edge walks into a bar.

U2 guitarist The Edge walks into a bar and says to the bartender "I'll ......................................... have a pint of Guinness."

The bartender replies "What's with all the delay?"

A date with the lead guitarist

(oc)
This groupie finally got a date with the lead guitarist of her band.

The next day, her friends asked her how things went. "Well", she replied, "it was frustrating... the guy spent half his time tuning up and the other half playing out of rhythm."

Musician Jokes

Q: how do you get a guitarist off your porch?
A: pay for the pizza
Q: how many folk singers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 6. One to change it and 5 to sing about how good the old one was.
Q:what did the drummer get on his I.Q test?
A: saliva.

Guitarist joke, Musician Jokes

What did the guitarist say to the magician...

Pick a chord, any chord.

What does a pedophile and a guitarist have in common...

They both like to finger A-minor.


A guitarist met a bassist and they had a jam...

After a while, the bassist stopped and said:

"That is very good and all, but why won't you play A?"

The guitarist replied "because 440 Hz"

What does a guitarist say when he gets to his gig?

"...Would you like fries with that?"

Guitarist joke, What does a guitarist say when he gets to his gig?

Musician's Joke: The guitarist of a band walks into their rehearsal room and sees the bassist and the drummer having an argument

Guitarist: "Why are you arguing?"

Bassist: "The drummer detuned one of my strings."

Guitarist: "So what's the problem?"

Bassist: "He won't tell me which one!"

Why did the ska guitarist take twice as long to fap?

He only knows up strokes

what do you call a rock group with no bassist, drummer, singer or guitarist?

Mount Rushmore

How many guitarists are needed to change a light bulb?

Five: one to change the bulb and the other four to tell him how Eric Clapton would do it.

Bonus: How many bass players are needed to change a light bulb?

Nobody cares

You can explore guitarist minor reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean guitarist classically dad jokes. There are also guitarist puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


A wavy guitarist has a low self esteem

He just wanted to B-flat

Can I borrow your G-String? Mine broke...

said one guitarist to the other

Why did the guitarist go to jail?

For fingering a minor

How do you know a guitarist is sad?

They start to fret.

Why did the audience hate the pedophile guitarist?

Because he broke a G string while fingering a minor

Guitarist joke, Why did the audience hate the pedophile guitarist?

What do you call someone who hangs around with four musicians?

A drummer.

[Bonus]

How do you get the guitarist off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.

Musicians are perverts.

The drummer sits in the back beating it, the guitarist is constantly fingering minors, the bassist is slapping it around, and they all like the pianist.

What did the experienced guitarist say to the new guitarist that was nervous about playing?

Dont fret about it.


Why did the guitarist leave his guitar on the ground?

It didn't have any pickups

Why was the guitarist arrested?

Because he was fingering A minor...

What's the difference between a lead guitarist and a terrorist?

You can actually negotiate with a terrorist.

Bob was a great guitarist

Until the day he stepped in a puddle while playing his Fender Strat, that was the moment he became a great conductor.

The singer thought he was the boss of the band

but it was the guitarist who pulled all the strings.

Why did the guitarist get life in prison?

He fingered a minor.

What do you call an acclaimed guitarist who raises chickens?

A Hen-drix

Did you hear about the guitarist who locked his keys in his van?

It took him 2 hours to get his drummer out.

Why did the guitarist get thrown in jail?

He was caught fingering A Minor.

Did you hear the guitarist who got in trouble?

He was fingering a G string but didn't notice it was A minor.

What's the fastest way to make money as a guitarist?

By selling your guitar.

What's the fastest way to make money as a bass guitarist?

Trade your 'need food' sign for one that says 'no amp'

Why did the hovering guitarist always look worried?

He was always fretting over something or other...

What's the difference between a rock guitarist and a folk guitarist?

A rock guitarist can play all night without tuning and folk guitarist can tune all night without playing.

How does a bass player pick up girls?

He says "Hi I'm a guitarist"

You hear about the legendary guitarist that had no vehicle ?

Carless Santana

How do you become as good a guitarist as Steve Vai?

You take your Vaitamins.

Why was the guitarist banned from church?

Because he struck a Gsus

How many guitarists does it take to replace a light bulb?

2. One to screw it in, and one to say he could do it better.

How many guitarists does it take to cover 'Dust In The Wind'?

Evidently all of them.

guitarists are pretty good as bisexual lovers

on the one hand, their fingering must be pretty good; on the other, their wrist action must be pretty good too.

How many guitarists does it take to change a lightbulb?

The answer is 50. One to change the lightbulb and 49 to say they can do better.

How do you invite a guitarist to a party?

Chordially.

I may be a Canadian blues guitarist...

..but I'm not your Buddy Guy.

Why was the guitarist put in jail?

For fingering A minor

NSFW I broke the G-String while fingering a minor

I'm a guitarist

They say I play like a prison guitarist

I'm always behind a few bars, and I can never find the right keys

What do you call a guitarist without a girlfriend?

A bassist.

(Don't get triggered, I play bass and I find this funny)

How do you get a guitarist to stop playing?

Give them some sheet music

A guitarist traveled back in time to the Medieval Ages and became an apprentice to a noble knight

He was a squier.

A local guitarist went to jail today

It was a major incident that involved a few minors and some g-strings.

What do you say when there's a singer, guitarist, bassist, and a drummer in a boat?

Abandon ship

Why don't guitarists like ukuleles?

Because they don't fret the small stuff

How much talent did the lead guitarist of Cream have?

A Clap-Ton.

It's the year 2295...

Dude: I'm a classically trained guitarist.

Neo-90s Kid: Radical!

Dude: So anyway, here's Wonderwall.

My friend was a pretty good guitarist

But that one time he stepped in a puddle while playing his electric guitar on an old, badly grounded amp, he became a great conductor.

Why did the anxious guitarist quit the band?

He didn't want to fret anymore.

What does Roy Moore and a guitarist have in common?

They both enjoy fingering minors.

A rock guitarist plays 3 chords in front of 1.5 million people

but a jazz guitarist plays 1.5 million chords in front of 3 people

For you guitarists out there...

After going through a brutal divorce, a woman decides to get revenge. She goes to get ex's house, and proceeds to destroy each and every one of his guitars. When she gets to court, the judge asks her;

"First offender?"

She replies; "No. First a Gibson, then a Fender."

If a guitar player is a guitarist and a bass player is a bassist, what is a lyre player?

A hipster.

How many guitarist does it take to play stairway to heaven?

Apparently all of them

Why Is it difficult to cook for a guitarist?

Because they're so picky

A man asked Satan...

"How can I become the best guitarist in the world?"

Satan answered, "Give me your soul."

The man was bewildered. "What if I gave you a dollar instead?"

Satan smiled. "Then I'll make you the best bass player in the world."

What does the guitarist of the Black Keys do on Daylight Savings time?

He sets his clock an Auerbach.

How many guitarists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them. One to actually screw it in, and the rest to go..

"Psh. I can do that."

Why was the guitarist put behind bars?

He fingered A Minor.

What do you call a guitarist who only knows two chords ?

A music critic

How do you know the guitarist is at the door?

He's got the wrong key, doesn't know when to come in.

-Nick Mason

What Did The Can Of Duster Say To The Guitarist?

Needs more wah.

How did the guitarist die?

He crashed his pickup into a bridge and broke his neck.

You guys know why a guitarist went to jail?

Cuz he fingered a minor

Why did the guitarist get arrested?

Because he kept plucking minors.

Q. Which shredding guitarist is best for putting out electrical fires?

A. Eddie Van Halon.

My wife bought a slash resistant purse.

I didn't realize the guitarist from Guns & Roses was causing that much trouble, but I'm glad science is solving the issue.

My friend got arrested for saying he was an axe murderer.

Turns out he's just a really bad guitarist.

Why did the lead guitarist get sent to prison?

for fingering a minor

How many guitarists does it take to change a lightbulb?

Six, one to change it and the other five to say how they could do it better.

What to you call a Guitarist with no arms?

An Amputee.

What's the difference between a jazz guitarist and a rock guitarist?

A rock guitarist plays 10 chords for 50,000 people,and a jazz guitarist plays 50,000 chords for 10 people.

What's a guitarist favour type of cheese?

Shredded cheese

Knock knock

Who's there?

Pete Townshend was lead guitarist for the.

Pete Townshend was lead guitarist for the who?

Yes.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the guitarist frontman jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working guitarist songwriter piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes