Groucho Marx Jokes
8 groucho marx jokes and hilarious groucho marx puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about groucho marx that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Cheeky Groucho Marx Jokes that Will Make You and Your Friends Chuckle
What is a good groucho marx joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
"outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend"
"inside of a dog, its too dark to read"-Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx is on TV, interviewing a woman with 14 children
— My god, that's a lot of children! How can you do this?
— I love my husband a lot…
— Lady, I love my cigar, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while!
What happened when Karl Marx got his tax return?
He became Groucho
One morning, I shot an elephant in my pajamas...
How he got into my pajamas, I don't know.
- Groucho Marx
Paraprosdokians
*A paraprosdokian is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. Some paraprosdokians not only change the meaning of an early phrase, but they also play on the double meaning of a particular word, creating a form of syllepsis.*
Where there's a will ... I want to be in it.
I like going to the park and watching the children run around ... because they don't know I'm using blanks. (Emo Philips)
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.
You can always count on the Americans to do the right thing ... after they have tried everything else. (Winston Churchill)
I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
In filling out an application, where it says, 'In case of emergency, Notify:' ... I put 'DOCTOR'.
If I am reading this graph correctly ... I'd be very surprised. (Stephen Colbert)
You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
I don't belong to an organized political party. I'm a Democrat. (Will Rogers)
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
I've had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it. (Groucho Marx)
You're never too old to learn ...something s**....
The sore t**...
Carl, a young man, woke up and suffered from an awful sore t**... and all but lost his voice. The small town's doctor operated out of his own home, so Carl made his way over, scratching at his sore t**....
Dr. Wendell's wife answered the door, "Yes?"
Carl, in a very quiet, breathy voice replied, "Is the doctor in?"
Mrs. Wendell replied in the same whispering tone, "No.... come on in!"
*-Groucho Marx*
Groucho Marx told this on You Bet Your Life
Why does a cow give buttermilk?
What else can a cow give but her milk?
I remember the first time I had s**......
I kept the receipt.
(by Groucho Marx)
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