The Best 76 Grey Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Grey jokes. There are some grey ashy jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these grey fluff puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Grey Jokes and Puns

Did you hear about the Native American chief who drank 50 gallons of Earl Grey?

He was found dead in the morning, drowned in his tee-pee.

A little girl walks into a pet shop and asks, "Excuthe me, but do you thell baby bunnieth?".

The pet store owner smiles and says, "Why, yes, sweetheart! We sell all kinds of baby bunnies. Now... what kind of baby bunny would you like? Would you like a baby grey bunny? Or a baby white bunny? Or would you prefer a pretty brown bunny?"

The little girl replies, "I don't think my python weally gives a thit."

What instant coffee and Sasha Grey
have in common?

3 in 1

Grey joke, What instant coffee and Sasha Grey 
have in common?

What did the man say after he vomited up a large grey African animal in the house.

I hate to bring up the elephant in the room.

(I never said it was a good joke).

I was looking at a cup of Earl Grey that always replenishes itself..

It was like staring into infinitea.


Roses are grey

Roses are grey,

Violets are grey,

Daisies are grey,

Because I'm a dog.

50 shades of grey

Girl 1: Hey have you read yet?
Girl 2: Yes! From cover to cover!
Girl 1: And the index?
Girl 2: Exhausted...

Grey joke, 50 shades of grey

What brand of vodka does a Canadian drink?

Grey Moose

What's worse than finding your first grey pubic hair......

....finding it between your teeth.

What's grey and comes in buckets?

An elephant!

Two big, strong, grey animals are talking to each other...

Animal 1: Hey, you realize we have horns on the top of our heads right?

Animal 2: Rhino

You can explore grey colorblind reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean grey wrinkly dad jokes. There are also grey puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


What's the difference between Jesus and Sasha Grey?

The look on their face while being nailed.

Fifty Shades of Grey beat the record for fastest selling R-rated movie in history...

Well, first it tied the record... then it beat it....

[credit goes to the Late Night with Seth Meyers writers]

I'm starting the dishes, and my wife is getting ready to go watch 50 Shades of Grey

I guess you could say we are BOTH pre soaking.

Why do women find the guy in 50 Shades of Grey sexy?

beats me

My wife said she wanted to see 50 Shades of Grey.

So I took a photo of her hair!

Grey joke, My wife said she wanted to see 50 Shades of Grey.

Why do women find Christian Grey so appealing?

Beats me.

Why does Karl Marx hate earl grey?

Because all proper tea is theft.

My wife said she wanted to see "Fifty Shades Of Grey".

So I showed her a picture of her hair.


I was having lunch with Boris, the Estonian IT guy....

He was telling me about the crazy night he had before moving to the US. He said
"I drank so much I go home with two Soviet prostitutes who live together with their fancy grey cat."

"Russian blue?"

"No but Ukrainian gave handjob!"

I wish I could re-enact the fantasy scenes from 50 Shades of Grey...

For example, the one where she gets a job right out of college.

50 shades of grey would be a perfect title for a movie about a dog reading a map of the US.

Colorblind people are wondering why is everyone on Facebook is celebrating Fifty Shades of Grey

What do Green Eggs and Ham and Fifty Shades of Grey have in common?

They both encourage people who can barely read to try new things.

Why are elephants big and grey?

Because if they were small and purple, they would be called grapes.

What is large, grey and sings great jazz songs?

Elephants Gerald

English Class

A teacher was at the front of her 1st Grade English class. She points out a girl at the front of the class. She asks "Suzie, can you use 'Definitely' in a sentence, please?". Suzie says - "The sky is definitely blue". The teacher replies "The sky can be grey or black, but good try". Johnny at the back of the class raises his hand. "Miss, do farts have lumps?" The teacher was completely baffled replied "No Johnny, why?"

"Then I definitely pooped my pants"

Why was Karl Marx arrested for brewing a cup of Earl Grey?

Because all proper tea is theft.

I really wish some of the fantasies in 50 shades of grey were real...

like how she got a job right out of college.

What's grey and comes in litres?

An elephant.

Apologies if this is a repost - heard it yesterday and had to share.

I found my first grey pubic hair today.

However, i didn't freak out about it like the other people in the elevator.

What is grey and comes in quarts?

An elephant

What's black, grey, and red all over?

A gorilla with a child in the enclosure.

Roses are...

Roses are grey,
Violets are grey,
i'm colourblind,
and Canadian, eh?

I just got my first grey hair.

This is the last time I let grandma cook dinner for me.

Roses are brown, violets are grey

I just found out I'm colorblind today.

What has 2 grey legs and 2 brown legs?

An elephant with diarrhea...

What's grey and comes in pints?

An Elephant.

Today I found my first grey pubic hair.

I got really excited, but not as much as the other people in the elevator.

Found my first grey pubic hair last night.

Just a shame it was in a kebab.

What's large, grey, and doesn't matter?

An irrelephant.

I was at an art gallery.

"Absolutely beautiful, isn't it?" I asked the guy next to me. "The way the yellow combines with the grey. The way the colours intertwine. Truly remarkable."

He stepped away from the urinal and left.

Donald Trump's family bought him a Gandalf the Grey costume for his birthday.

Unfortunately, this wasn't the sort of Grand Wizard outfit he had in mind...

Do you want to satisfy your hardcore food fetish?

Buy my new book: 50 Shades of Grey Poupon

This week Lego Batman sold more tickets than the sequel to 50 Shades of Grey...

When asked to comment about this 50 Shades stated "It's okay, I like to be dominated."

Mark Zuckerberg says he wears a grey t-shirt everyday because he doesn't want to waste time on things that don't matter.

He runs Facebook.

I tried stealing someone's Earl Grey once…

…but it wasn't my cup of tea.

Why is there no clear distinction concerning the morality of altering one's personality through brain surgery?

Because, it's a bit of a grey matter!

Mommy, why are some of your hairs turning grey?

A curious child asked his mother: Mommy, why are some of your hairs turning grey?

The mother tried to use this occasion to teach her child: It is because of you, dear. Every bad action of yours will turn one of my hairs grey!

The child replied innocently: Now I know why grandmother has only grey hairs on her head.

I found my first grey pubic hair today

I just didn't expect it to be in my Big Mac

Grey hair is hereditary

You get it from your kids.

What is grey, has four legs, and a trunk?

A mouse going on holiday.

What's big and grey and can't swim?

A parking lot.

Roses are grey, violets are grey

I am a dog...

I picked out a color of grey paint the other day, I guess the salesman didn't like it.

He just said "Oh, the hue manatee."

I remember doing a book report in elementary school on, "Fifty Shades of Grey".

I got a B+ and the teacher left a note saying, "thank god you didn't actually read the book, though I loved your creativity stating Christian Grey had 49 other clones".

3 wives want to decide what to wear

The first one says, "My husband has black hair so I will wear a black dress"
The second one says, "My husband has grey hair so I will wear a grey dress"
The third wife, on hear this starts panicking.
When asked she tell the other two, "My husband is bald"

I found my first grey pubic hair this morning.

Normally things like this don't bother me, but I found it in my sausage and egg McMuffin.

I found my first grey pubic hair today.

It wouldn't have bothered me but it was inside my Big Mac.

I just found out I am colour blind.

It really came out of the grey.

Fifty Shades of Grey has no plot.

It's just all climax.

What's grey and comes in ounces?

An elephant.

50 shades of grey is a genius title but had they thought about it

They should have added 19 more shades

3 old ladies are in a park

Three elderly grey ladies are sitting on a bench feeding birds in the park. Suddenly, a man runs in front of them and whips open his trench coat, to reveal he's wearing nothing underneath!

Astonished at the exposure the first Lady has a stroke. The second Lady has a stroke.

And

Sadly

the third old lady couldn't quite reach.

The NHS has just revealed a list of long-term side effects of vaccines!

- Old age
- Grey hair
- General decrease of diseases

Greying hair

A boy asked his dad "Why does hair turn grey?"

His dad considered his own grey hair and said "Son, everytime you do something shameful, I get a grey hair. Whenever you don't try your best, I get another grey hair. And when you don't listen to your parents, I get another grey hair!"

The boy said back "I was asking about grandpa's grey hair"

Roses are red April is grey joke

Roses are red April is grey, but in a few days it's gonna be May.

Husband in bed.

Woman looks deeply unhappy at herself in the mirror while getting ready for bed. She exclaims, Just look at me!..My hair is grey, wrinkles under my eyes, my boobs sag, my legs fat (GROAN!) . Husband, say something nice! Please!

Husband: Well, at least your eyesight is okay!

Which matter is denser than a black hole?

The grey matter inside lockdown protesters.

What is grey and unimportant?

An irrelephant

There is a reason why Daniel Craig has grey hair in the new James Bond film...

... it's because he's got 'No time to Dye'.

I just found my first grey pubic hair!

Normally these things don't bother me but it was in my Big Mac...

Its 1848 and two hunters from Boston are on a buffalo hunting expedition. They've hired the famous Blackfoot tracker, Grey Owl to track and locate buffalo for them.

As they follow Grey Owl's trail, they catch sight of him just ahead.

Grey Owl has his ear to the ground, and as the two hunters get close he says, "Three wagons, each pulled by four oxen pass this spot 20 minutes ago!"

The hunters are blown away! This is amazing! One of them asks, "Can you tell all of that just from listening to the ground?!"

"No", says Grey Owl, "As I listen for buffalo, the bastards ran me over."

broke up with the girlfriend because she was always up my ass about being colour blind and a dozen other things

too many grey flags

Did you hear about the dyslexic alcoholic?

He drank himself into an earl grey

African Grey Parrots are famously intelligent, but studies have shown that they consistently lose chess matches against ravens, jackdaws, and other corvids.

Said one researcher, "They just have trouble weighing the crows and pawns."

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the grey blueish jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working grey whitest piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes