Greeks Jokes
51 greeks jokes and hilarious greeks puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about greeks that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Greeks Short Jokes
Short greeks jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The greeks humour may include short curds jokes also.
- My friend says he has the body of a Greek God... I had to explain to him Buddha wasn't greek
- I passed all my courses except for Greek mythology. It has always been my Achilles' elbow.
- My girlfriend is absolutely beautiful. Body like a Greek statue... Completely pale, no arms.
- There's a Greek myth about a stream whose water will attach itself to your skin for all eternity. The river sticks
- My wife said I look like a Greek god. Her actual words were "Put your clothes on, we're in a museum" but I know what she meant.
- I really wish people would start taking Covid more seriously... I don't wanna have to learn the entire Greek alphabet.
- Not knowing about Greek mythology is my Achiless' Horse. Uh oh, I've really opened a Pandora's Labyrinth here
- TIL: The vasectomy procedure was pioneered by the Greek physician, Euclipides. His original instructions were as follows: "Euclipides nuts."
- Do you know the Greek version of Monopoly? It's called Monopoulos and you just borrow all the money from the bank.
Everyone loses. - Why don't the Bulgarians, Greeks, and Armenians celebrate Thanksgiving? Because they don't like Turkey.
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Greeks One Liners
Which greeks one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with greeks? I can suggest the ones about greek mythology and ancient greek.
- A Portuguese, a Greek, and a Spaniard go into a brothel. Who pays? Germany.
- The Greek restaurant in my town is so authentic that it went bankrupt
- My girlfriend has the body of a Greek Godess; Imaginary
- My lack of Greek mythology knowledge has always been my achilles elbow
- Not knowing Greek mythology is my biggest weakness It's my Achilles horse
- What does a Greek say when he receives his salary? Danke schön.
- Happy Greek Easter! Which Greek God loved to collect animals? Zoos
- Dated a Greek god, now I have cold sores Thanks a lot, Herpules
- What's the motto of the Greek army? Never leave your buddy's behind.
- I ate some bad Greek food now I falafel.
- Why does Bonnie Tyler only eat Greek Food? She's holding out for a gyro.
- When Greek people play a video game, what settings do they use? Default
- What do you call a greek goddess with no aim? Artemiss
- What do Greek Cats say? μ.
- What did the greek cow say? μ
Charming Humor Greeks Jokes with Loads of Fun
What funny jokes about greeks you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean alliance jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make greeks pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Greek and Italian were sitting at a coffee shop one day discussing who had the superior culture...
Over triple lattes the Greek guy says, "Well, we have the Parthenon." Arching his eyebrows, the Italian replies, "We have the Coliseum." The Greek retorts, "We Greeks gave birth to advanced mathematics." The Italian, nodding agreement, says, "But we built the Roman Empire." And so on and so on until the Greek comes up with what he thinks will end the discussion. With a flourish of finality he says, "We invented d**... s**...!" The Italian replies, "That is true, but it was the Italians who introduced it to women!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Greek and a Scotsman
A Greek and an Scotsman were sitting in a Starbuck's cafe one day discussing who had the superior culture. Over triple lattes the Greek guy says, 'Well, we Greeks built the Parthenon,' arching his eyebrows.
The Scotsman then replies, 'Well... it was the Scots that discovered the Summer and Winter Solstices.'
The Greek retorts, 'We Greeks gave birth to advanced mathematics.'
The Scotsman, nodding in agreement, says, 'Scots were the ones who
built the first timepieces and calendars.
And so on until the Greek comes up with what he thinks will end the discussion. With a flourish of finality he says, 'The Greeks were the ones who invented s**...!'
The Scotsman replies, 'Indeed, that is true, but it was we Scots who introduced it to women.'
Three Greeks and Three Turks are riding a train.
The Turks each buy one ticket, but the Greeks only buy one ticket total. The Turks are confused.
"How can you ride with one ticket?"
"Watch and you shall see."
The Greeks get on the train and pile into the bathroom. The Turks sit near the bathroom and observe. The conductor knocks on the door and says "Ticket please." The Greeks slide the ticket through the door.
The Turks think this is ingenious! They decide to try it, so on the ride back they buy only one ticket. But the Greeks don't buy any.
"How will you ride without any tickets?"
"Watch and you shall see."
They get on the train. The Turks pile into one bathroom, the Greeks into another. One Greek gets out of the bathroom, walks over to the bathroom the Turks are hiding in, and says:
"Ticket please."
Why were the Persians attracted to the Anatolian Greeks?
Because they were Ionic.
What do the Greeks sing while at sea?
ρ ρ ρ your boat, gently down the stream...
apparently syriza ran a successful online meme no campaign
beware of greeks bearing GIFs, i say.
Greeks lined up for ATM?
Isn't that kinda their thing?
Greeks are not impressed with an international bailout scheme
Declaring it to be a Mickey Moussaka plan.
Why did the Germans bail the Greeks out?
Because they took Pita on them
Why are the Greeks so in debt?
They demand credit for everything
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An Italian and a Greek get in a fight over s**...
Greek: the Greeks invented s**... centuries before the Italians!
Italians: maybe so but we improved on it by introducing it to women!
Why were the Greeks, Serbs and Croats not to keen on joining up with Bismarck?
They'd still be under a man named Otto.
What do Greeks call someone when the most common consonant in their name is R?
A rho-man
When the Greeks invaded Troy, why did their plot use an equine model instead of a bovine one?
Because if it was bovine, their plan would be in sham-bulls.
What unit of measurement did the ancient greeks use to measure their crops?
Demeter.
What are the Greeks forced to eat in their hyper-inflated economy?
Euros!
Why did the Greeks REALLY attack Troy?
They didn't pay their protection money.
What do Greeks use to listen to music?
Spartify
Why are Greeks so strong?
They fight off debt everyday.
What toothpaste brand did the Ancient Greeks use?
Laurel-B
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Long before the Turks invented condoms
The greeks invented s**....
And the italians thought it was so good, they introduced it to women
Greeks biggest strength!
What are greeks best at since the financial crisis?
In-depth reviews!
CUT TO THE PAST
Ian is a barber and one day after servicing a haircut, a customer instead of money, gives him a crystal sphere and Ian, not wanting to argue and especially liking the sphere, accepts it.
He presses the Sphere and suddenly he's transported to ancient Egypt with all the scissor and blades in hand.
The Greeks spot him and yell 'BarberIan'.
The Greeks invented threesomes
The Romans added the women
Why do greeks fly buisness?
Because they dont have an economy
The Grecian Gods vs the Greeks
Zeus and his human friend Spiro were watching a game of football, the gods versus the humans. Spiro looked around the pitch at all the players and then saw an absolute unit of a player, a half horse, half human professional. Spiro asked Zeus, Hey, who's that player over there? Zeus responded, That's our teams centaur-forward .
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why are a bunch of horses being sold better than the Greeks?
At least they have a stable economy.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Greatest s**... Culture . . .
A Greek and an Italian were talking one day, discussing who had the superior culture.
Over coffee, the Greek says, "Well, we built the Parthenon."
The Italian replies, "We built the Coliseum.
The Greek retorts, "We Greeks gave birth to mathematics."
The Italian, nodding, says, "But we built the Roman Empire ".
And so on and so on until the Greek comes up with what he thinks will end the discussion.
With a flourish of finality he says, "We invented s**...!"
The Italian replies, "That may be true, but it was the Italians who included women."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Ancient Greeks invented s**....
The Ancient Romans discovered women.
"So I matched with this cute guy on Tinder last night, and we started chatting and sending each other memes and little animations. But then he mentioned that he was an exchange student from Athens, so I ghosted him." "Why?"
"My daddy always told me, 'Beware the Greeks bearing gifs.'"
[Historical] What do the Persians, young boys and spiced lamb meat have in common?
Getting speared by the Ancient Greeks
The Greeks made a weapon that caught things on fire and could not be put out with water, it only made the flames bigger.
They called it Greece fire.
How did ancient Greeks keep tabs on their infants while they slept at night?
They used a baby minotaur.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Greeks invented s**...
The italians added women to it
How did the Ancient Greeks pay for parking?
They put money in Demeter.
Ancient cultures had interesting and unique philosophies
For example, if you asked the question: What separates man from animals? You would get vastly different answers.
The Greeks would say Philosophy and Law
The Chinese would say Morals and Art
The Romans would say The Mediterranean and the Danube
