The Best 45 Grease Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Grease jokes. There are some grease thriller jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these grease oil puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Grease Jokes and Puns

An engineer, chef, and a mathematician go out drinking

To their favorite bar and grill. Well they're having some drinks and laughing when a fire starts behind the bar.

Seeing the staff panicking, the engineer quickly calculates exactly how much water he'll need to put it out and runs in the back for a bucket.

The chef, from his own experience can tell its a grease fire so he runs in back to find salt.

The Mathematician looks at his friends, then to the fire. Upon realizing there is a solution, he promptly continues drinking.

What's the best way to grease a Ferrari?

Run over an Italian.

Importance of Planning

Why planning is important?

One night four college students were playing till late night and could not study for the test which was scheduled for the next day.

In the morning they thought of a plan. They made themselves look as dirty with grease and dirt. They then went up to the Dean and said that they had gone out to a wedding last night and on their return the tire of their car burst and they had to push the car all the way back and that they were in no condition to appear for the test.

So the Dean said they could have the re-test after 3 days. They thanked him and said they would be ready by that time.

On the third day they appeared before the Dean. The Dean said that as this was a Special Condition Test, all four were required to sit in separate classrooms for the test. They all agreed as they had prepared well in the last 3 days.

The test consisted of 2 questions with a total of 100 Marks.

See below for the question paper.

Q.1. Your Name…….. ………
(2 MARKS)

Q.2. Which tyre burst?
(98 MARKS)

a) Front left
b) Front right
c) Back left
d) Back right

Grease joke, Importance of Planning

Where were the first French fries made?

...in grease

A father says to his blonde, teenage daughter one day "honey I thought I asked you to wash the car like 10 times today"...

She replies "I swear I was going to, but I called a hundred different places and nobody has this Elbow Grease that you told me to use !!"


Geogrophy

If Iraq invaded Turkey from the rear, do you think Grease would help?

Many people think the Romans invented Vaseline

That was ancient grease

Grease joke, Many people think the Romans invented Vaseline

So John Travolta's career has been dwindling recently...

I guess you could say he fell from Grease.

They are starting to print new Euro notes...

...on grease proof paper.

I hear they're making a new 50 euro note on grease proof paper

Why did Aristotle hate French fries?

They were fried in ancient grease!

You can explore grease tostitos reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean grease pan dad jokes. There are also grease puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


How do you get a Michigan girl into an elevator?

How do you get a Michigan girl into an elevator?
Grease her hips, and throw in a Twinkie.

What do thanksgiving dinner and the refugee crisis in Europe have in common?

Turkey and grease

What do you call an oil stain that lasted for 1000 years?

Ancient grease

The musical "Grease" is getting a remake, but as a dark psychological thriller.

It's going to be directed by M. Night Shyamalamadingdong.

What's green and covered in bacon grease?

Kermit's finger

Grease joke, What's green and covered in bacon grease?

Put some elbow grease into that son!

But I have arthritis dad!

How many farmers does it take to grease a combine?

...only two, if you feed them in real slow.

After reviewing my diet...

it's no surprise my favorite musical is Grease.


I have a dishwashing liquid that attacks grease.

Mostly the uninspired cinematography and John Travolta's singing.

French Fries aren't made in France

They're made in Grease

What do you call an Italian transvestite?

A grease trap.

What would you call John Travolta in Athens in the year 1000 BC?

Ancient Grease

Why are they called French fries?

If they are obviously made in grease.

Where do French fries originally come from?

Grease

My girlfriend just started working at a grease factory ...

It's so hard to get ahold of her now.

TIL The first 'French Fries' weren't fried in France.

They were fried in grease.

Cr

I didn't quite get my girlfriend's complaints about my passion for Grease songs...

So I asked her to tell me more, tell me more.

The people on early Mediterranean cities used to enjoy using olive oil as "personal lubricant."

They really loved ancient grease.

French fries were never made in France

They were made in Grease

What's bacon's favorite movie?

Grease

Are you on the Mediterranean Diet?

Because I see a lot turkey and grease.

I just watched a broke, fat dude lick pizza grease from his shirt for 10 minutes straight.

I need to stop eating in front of the mirror.

Where are French fries from?

France?

No. Grease.

About a month before his death my uncle asked us to cover him in grease

He went downhill quite quickly after that.

I ordered a pizza from a new store close to me and it was covered in oil.

Expected Italy; got grease.

Europe is like a fridge

You have the freezing cold part at the top

Then in the middle, you have cheese, cold meat, and a good drinks selection

Then down the bottom corner, there's just turkey and grease

People in Athens have a hard time waking up early

Because dawn is tough on grease

A fire breaks out in the kitchen.

The man rushes over to the emergency station and comes back with a large red tube. He points it at the fire and squeezes the lever. The tube says, that's a grease fire! The man looks closer at what he's carrying. Dammit, he says, I accidentally bought a fire distinguisher!

A 90 year old just told this: What happens when you drop the turkey out of the oven?

It's the downfall of Turkey and the overflow of grease.

How is working at McDonald's like being an archaeologist in Athens?

Either way, you end up smelling like ancient grease.

What do you call a "Grilled Cheese" after a few days in the fridge?

Chilled Grease

Where were the first doughnuts made?

In grease!

I saw an oil stain that was 1000 years old

It was ancient grease.

Dont see why people say that babysitting a toddler is hard. You just grease the bathtub, put them inside with some food and drink, and go do your business. I guarantee you that they will still be there when you return.

If you stay in the house, you might need to use sound cancelling headphones too though.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the grease nationwide jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working grease restraunt piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes