Gray Jokes
91 gray jokes and hilarious gray puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about gray that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Laugh until you’re gray in the face with hilarious Gray Jokes! Got ‘em all from Ugly Dave Gray, the Gray Wolf, a Gray Hair Birthday, a Gray Beard, a Gray Report, the Gray Matter, and the Gray Sweatpants! Plus Blue, Bambi, and the Colourblind too!
Funniest Gray Short Jokes
Short gray jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The gray humour may include short grey jokes also.
- It's interesting how different a US president looks at the end of their presidency. Obama had gray hair. Bush had a bunch of wrinkles.. At the end of JFKs presidency, half of his head was missing.
- I bought a shirt and some neckwear from Ebay that used to belong to the guy from the Mamas & the Papas All the sleeves are brown and the tie is gray
- When my kindle reads Fifty Shades of Gray to me It's like getting an obscene phone call from Stephen Hawking
- A man is driving across town with his dog. He sees a traffic light and begins to stop.
The dog says, "Why are you slowing down, the light's gray?" - Got kicked out of Barnes and Noble for moving the "Caution Wet Floor" sign to the Fifty Shades of Gray aisle.
- A woman is looking at herself in the mirror "Ugh I look so old! My skin is sagging, my hair is turning gray, I've got crows feet..."
Her husband says, "well, at least your eyesight is intact." - [OC] Grandad was a Flash cosplayer back in his days Cause I have found some of his gray uniforms from the 1940's with thunder signs on it.
- I want to reenact a scene from 50 Shades of Gray.... Y'know the one where she gets a job right out of college.
- Ironically, the only way you could get me to watch 50 shades of gray is if you tied me up and forced me to watch it.
- Apple and Fifty Shades of Gray are popular for the same reason ... ... they both offer the fantasy of being dominated by a rich guy, who pushes the boundarys of what you though you were into.
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Gray One Liners
Which gray one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with gray? I can suggest the ones about green and grey hair.
- What's the difference between grey and gray? One is a color, and the other is a colour.
- I love spoiling the plot of The Picture of Dorian Gray Never gets old
- The day I found my first gray hairs... I thought I'd dye!
- Found my old copy of Picture of Dorian Gray in the attic It has not aged well.
- What weighs more, black or gray? Black does. Gray is a little lighter.
- What animal has two gray feet and two brown feet? An elephant with diarrhea.
- Why didn't Karl Marx drink Earl Gray? All proper tea is theft.
- What's large, gray, wrinkly, and not important? An irrelephant.
- What is gray, has four legs and a trunk? A mouse going on vacation.
- Obama portrait joke You’ll note that he refused to hide any of my gray hairs
- What's gray and comes in quarts? Elephants.
- Roses are gray. Violets are gray. I'm a dog.
Happy Valentine's Day! - Roses are gray Violets are gray
I'm color blind
And not very good at poetry - I told Dorian Gray that I'd fixed his painting while he was out… The look on his face....
- Roses are gray, violets are gray, tulips are gray Im a dog.
Gray Hair Jokes
Here is a list of funny gray hair jokes and even better gray hair puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why don't Baptist preachers color their hair? They just pray the gray away
- I am quite old, so I wasn't shocked today during a
thorough inspection to find that I had a gray p**...
hair. The other people on the elevator seemed pretty surprised, though. - So, I found my first gray p**... hair the other day. I was way more excited about it than the other people on the elevator.
- I found my first gray p**... hair today. It was in my Big Mac
- I just found my first gray p**... hair, and am happy and sad at the same time... Happy it was not mine, sad that I found it in my Burger King whopper.
- I found my first gray p**... hair today... Normally these things wouldn't bother me if it wasn't in my burger...
Gray Matter Jokes
Here is a list of funny gray matter jokes and even better gray matter puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What is very big, gray, and just doesn't matter? An irrelephant.
- What is large, gray, and doesn't matter? An irrelevant
- Do brain cells really even matter? I don't know, it's a gray area for me
Cheeky Gray Jokes that Will Make You and Your Friends Chuckle
What funny jokes about gray you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean silver jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make gray pranks.
Where does Dorian Gray get his clothes?
Forever 21.
Acceptance in Rainbowland has come at a high cost.
Sarah recently came out to her parents as gray.
The police vs the senior citizen
A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mp...h, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this," and pulled over to await the trooper's arrival. Pulling in behind him, the trooper walked up to the Corvette, looked at his watch, and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a reason for speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."
The old gentleman paused. Then he said, "Years ago, my wife
ran off with a State trooper. I thought you were bringing her back."
"Have a good day, sir," replied the trooper
Tribal Wisdom
So a cowboy is riding along a trail in the old west and sees an Indian lying on his stomach with his ear to the ground. As he gets closer he hears the Indian saying to himself "Wagon...two gray horses...two passengers, man and woman...man driving" The cowboy goes "Wow! you can tell all that by just putting your ear to the ground?" The Indian replies "No. Wagon pass half hour ago, run me over."
What's enormous, gray, and unimportant?
Irrelephant.
50 Shades of Gray
I'm not really interested in watching that film. In order to make me see it, someone would literally have to tie me up and drag me there.
My wife says we should spice up our s**... life with some stuff from 50 Shades of Gray.
First, she wants me to become a billionaire.
What's small, gray, and came in little cans?
Michael Jackson.
50 Shades
He slowly but firmly grabs my t**.... I try to say goodbye and I choke. I try to walk away and I stumble...'
- of Macy Gray.
A man is asked why he can't see the Fifty Shades of Gray movie...
He replies, "I'm color blind and can only see 36 of them."
Man goes into a hardware store...
Says to the shopkeeper, "Can I have a roll of masking tape and some zip ties"
Shopkeeper smiles knowingly, "I'm sorry, thanks to the 50 Shades of Gray film we're out of stock"
The man winces and replies, "OK, just give me a chainsaw and some bin bags"
Michael Brown, Freddie Gray...
The police really don't like colored people.
ACT FAST!! Huge discounts at all stores in Baltimore.
use promo code "Freddie Gray" at checkout.
sorry guys, but the discounts are in-store only.
What did the White crayon say to the Black crayon?
We make a GRAY team!
The color black is out drinking with his friends.
Black says to the bartender, "Hey, something isn't right. Where is all the color white?"
Bartender says, "dude, this is a gray bar.
What's gray, disappointing, and in the shape of an oval?
Where dose Dorian Gray shop?
forever 21
What do an elephant and a giraffe have in common?
They are both gray except for the giraffe.
TIL that if someone's face is looking gray, you can fix it by giving them tea
Then they'll be great.
What's gray, has big ears, and a trunk?
A mouse on vacation.
What's gray, and if it gets in your eye, you'll probably die?
The Empire State Building
Any help in making a gray t-shirt out of steel wool?
Sorry, wrong thread.
I turned on the TV, and it was static
My wife asked me, "what's that noise?" I said "fifty shades of gray"
Apple put an end to the black market..
With that *Space Gray market*
Why is an elephant large, gray, and wrinkled?
Because if it was small, white, and smooth, it would be an aspirin.
Trump is really good about his ears.
He wears ear plugs at loud concerts.
He makes sure his ear wax doesn't build up.
He keeps the gray hairs growing out of his ears nice and trimmed.
He's quite possibly the most ear responsible president we've ever had.
Television was never really black and white before color
It was basically just 50 shades of gray
I love ruining the plot of Dorian Gray for people
It never gets old.
What's big, gray, and can't float?
A castle
Gray Hair
A curious child asked his mother: Mommy, why are some of your hairs turning gray?
The mother tried to use this occasion to teach her child: It is because of you, dear. Every bad action of yours will turn one of my hairs gray!
The child replied innocently: Now I know why grandmother has only gray hairs on her head.
My wife said she found my first gray hair, but I didn't believe her for the longest time. Then when I was brushing my teeth this morning I saw it in the mirror, on the left side of my mustache.
It was right under my nose this whole time.
A little girl goes up to her mom and asks Why are you getting gray hair?
A little girl goes up to her mom and asks Why are you getting gray hair? The mother responds, well every time you do something that upsets me I vet a gray hair.
The girl thinks for a minute. Then says, wooow you must of really p**... off grandma.
My wife made up this joke in a dream and woke herself up laughing...
Q: How do you tell the difference between a Golder Retriever and a Dalmatian?
A: You get down on the floor and spin them around real fast. One of them is yellow and the other one is gray.
There's a gray line between getting a metaphor right or wrong
And in the fine area there's a punch line
The old man and the elevator.
An old man from the country takes his family to town for the first time. They're at the mall and the mall has an elevator. Him and his son are watching this thing in amazement as they never saw one before and was not sure what it was. An older lady at least 80 with Gray hair in rollers and a walking cane walks into the elevator. A few minutes later a beautiful 25 year old blonde with huge t**... walks out. The old man says to his son "Quick go get your mama".
When my wife said she'd be with me until I was old and gray
I did not realize she meant 37
Roses are gray
Violets are gray
Tulips are gray
Because I am a dog
Wifes eye site
A older man comes home from work,and he finds his wife standing in front of the mirror crying. He walks over and asks what's the matter hunny? THE WIFE SAYS. Can you find anything good about me. Look at me my hairs gray, my b**... is sagging, my boots are hanging down.. Is there anything left that's good about me.
The husband looks her up and down , and then he reply. WELL YOUR EYE SITE IS GOOD.
