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Grand Canyon Jokes

56 grand canyon jokes and hilarious grand canyon puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about grand canyon that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Grand Canyon Short Jokes

Short grand canyon jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The grand canyon humour may include short canyon jokes also.

  1. TIL it's possible to jump without a parachute from the top of the Grand Canyon all the way to the bottom. But not twice.
  2. I tried to get the Russian government to throw all of their old leaders in the Grand Canyon but they refused. Nobody understands my Tzar Chasm...
  3. My wife and I recently went on a trip to Arizona, but we got into a fight about whether we should go to Meteor Crater or the Grand Canyon. It was a whole thing.
  4. At some point out there... There's a teenage girl that's taking pictures of the Grand Canyon with the camera in Portrait mode.
  5. Overheard this at Grand Canyon. "Why do they put chicken wire around these plants? Other guy:" To protect the chicken plants"
  6. HIM: heard your girlfriend died trying to jump over the Grand Canyon, how are you doing? ME: I can't get over it.
    HIM: it's okay, neither could she.
  7. I'm going to the Kentucky men's basketball game vs Grand Canyon tonight I'm pretty worried, I hear Grand Canyon's really deep.
  8. Chuck Norris once went skydiving but promised never to do it again.
    One Grand Canyon is enough.
  9. Chuck Norris once went sky diving, he did not use a parachute.
    The spot he landed on is now known as the Grand Canyon.
  10. How was the Grand Canyon formed? A jew lost a penny there.

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Grand Canyon One Liners

Which grand canyon one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with grand canyon? I can suggest the ones about golden gate and national park.

  1. Why did your dad visit the grand canyon last night? Because your mom was in the mood.
  2. Have you read the book Grand Canyon mishap? It was written by Illen Dover and Phil Lin.
  3. The Grand Canyon is so beautiful Or should I say gorge-ous!
  4. What does the Pope say when the Grand Canyon starts to flash flood? God, dam it.
  5. How beautiful is the Grand Canyon? It's just gorges
  6. Why you should definitely visit the Grand Canyon... Well... it's just plain *gorge*-ous
  7. Yo mama so fat whet she took her first step the grand canyon was made
  8. Yo mammas so fat When she fell in the grand canyon she got stuck in between
  9. Chuck Norris once decided to dig a hole, today we call it the Grand Canyon.
  10. Chuck Norris created the Grand Canyon because he coughed "Just Once".
  11. Yo momma so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!
  12. Chuck Norris jumped the grand canyon...longways
  13. Yo momma's so fat, she fell into the Grand Canyon and got stuck!
  14. Yo Momma So fat That when we visited the grand canyon it yelled into her.
  15. How was the Grand Canyon get built? A Jew dropped a penny.

Grand Canyon Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter

What funny jokes about grand canyon you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean golden gate bridge jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make grand canyon pranks.

Chuck norris f**... in a ditch and the grand canyon was created.

Me: *drops my kid off*

Everyone else at the grand canyon:
*shocked pikachu face*

The secret to a long marriage

A reporter was doing a human interest story for a local newspaper, and was interviewing an elderly couple celebrating sixty years of marriage. The obvious question the reporter posed was "What's the secret to a long marriage?"
"Oh," the man started. "It's all about perseverance. On our honeymoon, we went to the Grand Canyon and rode on mules down the trail. Well, my new wife's mule bucked her off, and she fell on the ground. She just yelled, 'That's ONE!' and got right back on. A couple minutes, the mule did it again, and she yelled, 'That's TWO!' and got right back on. When the mule did it a third time, she yelled, 'That's THREE!' and she took out a gun and shot the mule dead."
The reporter was shocked at the story, and asked, "How does that relate to a long marriage?"
And the man replied, "Well, I told her that was no way to treat a mule, and she looked at me and said 'That's ONE!'"

A father-son hike

A Father and his son are hiking in the grand canyon. The go around some bends, over some hills, and through some nooks. They round the bend and see a native american sitting on a rock.
The father points to the native american and says, son, native americans have the best memory of any peoples in the world
The young son thinks he's quite the smart one and goes up to the native american and says, What did you have for breakfast last tuesday.
Without hesitation the Native American responds, eggs. The son is impressed and goes on with the hike with his father.
30 years later the son is now a grown man, and is hiking the same trail with his own son. He goes around the same bends, over the same hills, and lo and behold, rounds the corner and there is that same native american on the same rock.
He's an older wiser man now, and will really test this native american. He walks up, raises his hand in greeting and says HOW
Native American responds, Scrambled.

A 25-y.o. man is tightrope walking across the Grand Canyon.

1/2 way around the world a different 25-y.o. is getting a b**... from an 82-y.o. Thai p**.... Neither one of these guys knows the other guy exists, yet they are both thinking the exact same thing at the exact same time.
Just don't look down.

Polititians

So this bus full of politicians is on it'd way to see the grand canyon. In the middle dof the desert a dust storm hits and the bus crashes widly. An ambulance arrives on the scene and finding the mangled corpses buries all of them on the spot.
The police arrive to investigate for foul play and upon learning that the politicians were already all buried the chief asks, "why would you do that? Were you sure all of them were even dead?"
"Well we did hear a few screams to stop and that 'we're not dead' but of course we all know, you can't trust politicians!"

How was the Grand Canyon created?

A Jew lost a penny (incoming angry comments)

How was the grand canyon formed?

A Jew dropped a penny down a gopher hole

Books Never Written

Hey guys, don't know if you're familiar with these kind of jokes, but they were my favorite growing up, so I thought I'd post a bunch of the here. They're pretty corny, but I hope you enjoy!
*Take A Breather* by Justin Hale
*How to Become Famous* by Anonymous
*Living Long* by Diane Perish
*How to Get Rich* by Robin A. Bank
*I'm So Greedy* by Jenna Russ
*How to Drive a Manual Transmission* by Otto Matic
*How to be a Great Pilot* by Mae Day
*Where to Find Wildebeests* By Sara N. Getti
*Raising Kids* by Bill E. Goat
*Warriors of Feudal Japan* by Sam A. Rye
*Woodwind Instruments* by Clara Net
*Tragedy at the Grand Canyon* by Eileen Dover
*The Human Brain* by Sir E. Brum and Sara Bellum
*Deep in Debt* by Owen A. Lott
*The World is a Big Place* by Mike Robe
*Confessions of a Mental Patient* by Justin Sane

m**... at The Grand Canyon!

Investigators, hot on the trail.

Why did the Grand Canyon kill itself?

It was feeling a little too depressive.

A group of Polish tourists is flying on a small airplane through the Grand Canyon on a sightseeing tour.

The tour guide announces: "On the right of the airplane, you can see the famous Bright Angle Falls."
The tourists leap out of their seats and crowd to the windows on the right side. This causes a dynamic imbalance, and the plane violently rolls to the side and crashes into the canyon wall. All aboard are lost.
The moral to this episode is: always keep your poles off the right side of the plane.

A Texan at the Grand Canyon

I had a Slovakian friend who toured the Grand Canyon on his American holiday in a group with a Texan in it. They're standing on the precipice watching a sunset over the vast Southwest pastel and neon sky, when the Texan points to the stunning, striated canyon walls below and utters to my friend in a whisper, You know, I could fix that hole.

A Mishap

My sister won't let me hold her baby anymore...
Last time I held my sister's baby, I dropped it. It wasn't even a big deal, but she started freaking out. It was an accident! Just an accident, no big deal. What happened was, after I was holding the baby and I inevitably dropped it, we start arguing and she's overreacting big time. She called the cops, said I did it on purpose, blah blah of course all the while I'm denying it. She's all red in the face screaming at me
But my real question is, who brings a baby to the Grand Canyon?
Nah I'm just kidding, my sister doesn't have kids
Anymore.

The other day I dropped my baby nephew and my sister started freaking out

I understand that I should be more careful, but let's be honest, who the f*** brings a baby to the Grand Canyon?

An eagle is flying over the Grand Canyon when it spies a frog by a stream.

The eagle swoops down and swallows the frog whole, flying off with a full stomach. Somehow the frog makes it through the eagle's digestive tract and pokes his head out of the eagle's a**....
The frog takes a look around and yells back at the eagle: "Hey eagle. About how high up are we?
The eagle yells back, "Oh about 10,000 feet."
The frog replies, "Really? You wouldn't s**... me now, would you?"

jokes about grand canyon