The Best 9 Grampa Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Grampa jokes. There are some grampa granpa jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these grampa grandpa puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Grampa Jokes and Puns

My 7 year old is a dad

Me: I need to go get something from the car

Son: I want to come!

Me: no, just wait for me please

I come back inside to a digital scale sitting on the floor in front of the door

Son: okay, I *weighted* for you

I'm such a proud grampa

Here's one my grampa told me when I was a small boy.

A drunk is driving through the city and his car is weaving all over the road. Eventually a cop pulls him over.

"Did you know," says the cop, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?" 

"Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk. "For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."


Shut up and keep digging...


A grandson asks his grandfather:

Grampa did you get to kill anyone when you were in the army?

Yes, I killed more than 50 men.

But I tought you were an helicopter mechanic!

Yes, but not a good one.

Why do Trump supporters enjoy polish people at his rally...

so that they can say that their ahead in the Poles.

Polish gram-pa said it.

Son, what was the name of the german guy that hides my stuff?

Alzheimer grampa Alzheimer

When I die, I want to die like my grampa, peacefully in his sleep....

... not like the 3 passengers in the car.

My favorite vegetable...

I work at a grocery store. This kid comes up to me today and asks me what my favorite vegetable is.

Cauliflower, I tell him. What about yours?

Grampa, he replied.

Why did the condom fly across the room?

Because Grampa just shoots air these days.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the grampa gramma jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working grampa pappy piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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