JokoJokes

Grade Jokes

178 grade jokes and hilarious grade puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about grade that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Want to get a laugh out of your child's classmates or schoolmates? Check out this collection of grade jokes, featuring one-liners and puns about first grade, second grade, third grade, fourth grade, fifth grade, sixth grade, GPA, sophomore and recess! Learn the funniest jokes and be sure to bring the smiles!

Best Short Grade Jokes

Short grade jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The grade humour may include short degree jokes also.

  1. A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are all in the 9th Grade. Which one is the sexiest? The blonde, because she's the only one who's 18.
  2. When I was in high school, my dad f*cked my teacher repeatedly for better grades in my math class. Thank god im homeschooled or that could have been wierd
  3. The first joke I made up at age 7 - found in my first grade journal Q: Where do robbers go to the bathroom
    A: Arrest-room
  4. I wish my college professors graded papers like Trump 'wins' elections \*Professor grading my test\*
    Well he got the first couple questions right looks like I can stop grading the rest.
  5. A teacher told her first grade class, "A single dolphin can have two hundred off-spring!" A little girl gasped, "How about the married ones?"
  6. I've heard that students in Death Valley get terrible grades. They never get above C level.
  7. Why don't you fight the black kid that is in the second grade? Because his father is in the eighth grade.
  8. What soft and wrinkly but gets sharper when you use it? Your brain! (This joke brought to you by one of my 2nd grade students. I told him it was so good I was going to put it on the internet.)
  9. My friend just came to me all depressed because his kid's failing 3rd grade, and he doesn't know how to break it to him. Apparently slowly wasn't the advice he was looking for.
  10. My son handed me his report card and I asked him, Why is this wet? He said, My grades are below C level.

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Grade joke, My son handed me his <a href="/card-jokes.html" title="Card jokes">report card</a> and I asked him,


Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about grade can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of grade puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Grade One Liners

Which grade one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with grade? I can suggest the ones about rating and score.

  1. What sort of grades did Tommy Wiseau receive in school? Oh, high marks.
  2. I think I'm failing my marine biology class My grade is below C level.
  3. In my 4th grade class the cutest girl threw away my love letter.. ..so I failed her!
  4. Can anyone adopt my grades? I clearly can't raise them myself.
  5. I put my grades up for adoption Because I couldn't raise them anymore.
  6. Why did the sailor ground his son? His grades were below sea level
    ^^im ^^so ^^sorry
  7. What grades did Fidel Castro get at school? Full Marx
  8. Why did I leave my grades at the orphanage? I couldn't raise them
  9. Why was the student's report card wet? Because his grades were below C-level.
  10. My jokes are military grade Cheap and overused
  11. Use the promo code Netflix for 15% off of your grades
  12. What is the average grade of a pirate in college? High C's
  13. Use promo code 'NETFLIX' to get 50% off your grades.
  14. Why did the sailor ground his son? Because his grades were below sea level
  15. Why did the kid drown in school? He got below C level grades.

Grade School Jokes

Here is a list of funny grade school jokes and even better grade school puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Visiting my first grade son at school lunch today... Me: How is school going so far?
    Son: Good, I had a test.
    Me: What was your test on?
    Son: Paper.
  • What's the difference between a pakistani grade school and an Al-Qaeda training base? How am I supposed to know, I just pilot the drone
  • Pros of my high school years: I graduated top of my class, was voted prom king, and hooked up with the hottest girl in my grade. Cons of my high school years: my twin sister and I were homeschooled.
  • New data has claimed that only 52% of students leave school with an acceptable grade in Maths. Safe to say I am part of the 34% that struggled with it.
  • What does every frenchmen learn in first grade of school? (sorry France) How to surrender in 6 different languages.
  • What is a snowflake's school grade based on? Class precipitation.
  • Last year, 7th grade students were forced to clean the entire school. This year, the principal said, "Last year, the 7th grade student did the cleaning. This year, let the 8th grade students do it."
  • What grade did Tommy Wisaeu usually get in school? A high mark.
  • My grade school math teacher once asked us what 280 x 18 was I kept shouting "7!" but apparently we weren't on the topic of factorials yet
  • How many grades are in dog school? Grades K-9

First Grade Jokes

Here is a list of funny first grade jokes and even better first grade puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Mike Tyson was arrested at a 5th grade sitting bee his first time judging The word was Dictate.
    [Spelling Bee Contestant] Can you use it in a sentence?
    [Mike Tyson] She liked the way my Dictate
  • What's green and red and goes 100 miles an hour? A frog in a blender.
    This joke brought to you by one of my first grade students who loudly shared it at lunch this week.
  • What's long and hard on a black man? The First grade!
  • What's Admiral Akbar's Favorite Shape? It's a Trapezoid! I apologize if this has been posted before. It came to me sitting in a first grade class today (I'm a substitute teacher, not a 7 year old).
  • My neighbor who was a first grade teacher just got arrested for prostitution I've know her for ten years
    I never knew she was a teacher
  • What are the four hardest years of a police officer's life? The first grade.
  • I was in a first-grade class, and I saw a cute girl. I asked the girl out, but then I got kicked out of the school.
    I am never allowed to teach there again.
  • first grade level joke why did the banana put on sun screen?
    answer: so it wouldn't peel!
  • As a little kid, I was unusually confident. I even used to call my first grade teacher "Sweetheart!" He hated it.
  • My first breakup was in grade two... She left me for the guy with a new pencil.

Third Grade Jokes

Here is a list of funny third grade jokes and even better third grade puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • You know, Dwayne Johnson was always a special kid... In third grade, all the other kids drew a family tree. Little dwayne made a family quarry.
  • I wet my pants in the third grade once... And it cost me my teaching career.
  • What is long and hard on a black man? Third grade.
  • Sitting Indian Style When I was in third grade the teacher told us to sit Indian Style. So I drank a 30 case of beer and laid in a gutter.
  • What is long and hard for a black guy? Third grade
  • TIFU by approaching a woman I thought I had as a teacher for one day in third grade, but it wasn't her Oh, my bad, wrong sub
  • What do you get when you cross a Sith Lord, and a Donkey? Darth Mule!
    A joke, from third grade me...
    Happy Star Wars day!
  • What are the worst six years in a blonde's life? Third Grade!
  • Believe it or not, I dated a squirrel in third grade. She drove me nuts, though.
  • What's long and hard for a black person? The third grade.

Second Grade Jokes

Here is a list of funny second grade jokes and even better second grade puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Top joke in my second grade class this week: Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall? To make up for his miserable summer.
  • I adopted a cat but it turned out that my daughter is allergic to cats So, I am giving her away for adoption. She's 7 and she's in second grade
  • What's the three toughest years of a bass player? Second grade.
  • Anti-Vax Ideas Are A Lot Like Unvaccinated Children Neither will survive past the second grade.
  • Is this a dad Joke? I can't tell, because my dad was locked up in the second grade.
  • When I was a kid, in the second grade, my parents began teaching me to expand my vocabulary so I didn't sound "dumb" Nowadays parents only have show their children memes of Donald Trump
  • I was so disappointed on my second day of school... I was still in the first grade.
  • Your mama so old she sat next to Moses in the second grade.
  • What's long and hard on a h**...? second grade.
  • What does a second grade teacher yell when she is having s**...? "A,E,I,O,U..AND SOMETIMES Y!"

3rd Grade Jokes

Here is a list of funny 3rd grade jokes and even better 3rd grade puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I used to pee my pants every time i had to talk in front of my 3rd grade class It really killed my teaching career.
  • 3rd grade math If you have 7 apples in one hand, and 5 in the other, what do you have?
    -Really large hands.
  • One from 3rd Grade: What's the name of the funniest mountain range? The Himhilarious
  • Did you hear about the potato that teaches 3rd grade? He's loves being an edutater
  • What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his 3rd grade teacher asked him to be a classical composer in the school play ? I'll be Bach
  • Did you hear about the 8-year old dairy farmer? He had to repeat 3rd grade because he was a slow churner.
  • I caught my girlfriend cheating... ...so I gave her an F and told her she needs to study if she wants to pass the 3rd grade.
  • Made this joke up when I was 33. Extremely proud of it. Why did the salt fail 3rd grade.
    Cause it was sodiumb.
  • What is the longest and hardest thing for a black man? 3rd grade
  • What's long and hard on a black man? 3rd grade
Grade joke, What's long and hard on a black man?

Hilarious Grade Jokes for a Fun-Filled Night with Friends

What funny jokes about grade you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean rank jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make grade prank.

A blonde walking down the street sees a young boy smoking."You shouldn't be smoking.What grade are you in ?"asks the blonde.

The child says:"I'm in third grade,weren't you smoking when you were in third grade?" The blonde answers:" Yes, I was, but I was eighteen years old!"

A 2nd grade class just gets in from recess...

The teacher tells the class they're going to do a spelling assignment that relates to what they did for recess. "If you can come up to the board and write the word I give you, you'll get a gold star for the day," the teacher explains. "Tommy, what'd you do for recess?" she asks the first student. "Well," Tommy begins, "I played in the sand box with Suzy!" "Okay great. If you can come to the board and spell the word 'sand' I'll give you a gold star." So Tommy goes up to the board, spells 'sand' and gets a gold star for the day. Then the teacher asks Suzy, "Suzy, what'd you do for recess today?" So Suzy answers, "like Tommy said, we played in the sand box together." "Okay," the teacher thinks, "if you can come up to the board and spell 'box' I'll give you a gold star. So Suzy spells 'box' and gets a gold star for the day. Then the teacher asks the third student, "Tyrone, what'd you do for recess today?" "Well I wanted to play in the sand box with Tommy and Suzy but they wouldn't let me," Tyrone answers. "Oh no!" says the teacher, "That's terrible! Do you know what that's called? That's called 'racial discrimination.' If you can come up to the board and spell 'racial discrimination' I'll give you a gold star."

I knew a kid in grade school who was born with deformed eyelids...

...So they took the flesh from his circumcision to fix his deformity. For the rest of his life he was c**...-eyed.

What is long and hard on a Newfie?

Grade 1.

Successful entrepreneur

I met an old friend from high school the other day, and I couldn't believe how wealthy he had become. He ran a massively successful business, but could barely get a passing grade in math class when I knew him.
I asked him how he did it.
He said it was easy.
"All I did was find a product I could make for $2 and sell for $4. You'd be surprised just how much 2% adds up over the years!"

What did Kurt Kobain have such a terrible time in 7th grade?

He was having a mid-life crisis.

So a man dies and goes to Heaven...

In Heaven, he asks God what the coolest things about Heaven are.
God says, "Well, here in Heaven, a minute lasts a million years, and a penny is worth a million dollars."
The man replies, "Oh, cool! Can I have a penny?"
To which God tells him, "In a minute."
My fifth grade teacher told me this joke when I was in, well, fifth grade.

It's that time of year again...

A female student goes to a male professor and says "I would be willing to do ANYTHING to get a good grade"
The professor replies "Anything?"
The student suggestively replies, " Yes, anything!"
The professor says "Good! Come to class, hand in assignments on time and study!"

"What do you want to be when you grow up?"

A teacher asks the kids in her 3rd grade class:

"What do you want to be when you grow up?"


Little Kevin says: "I wanna start out as a Marine Pilot, then be a billionaire, go to the most expensive clubs, find me the finest h**..., give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel throughout Europe, an Infinite Visa Card, and all the while b**... her like a loose screen door in a hurricane."

The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with this horrible response from little Kevin, decides not to acknowledge what he said and simply tries to continue with the lesson . .. . ..

And how about you, Sarah?"

"I wanna be Kevin¹s h**...."

A 4th grade '49ers fan in Dallas

The scene is a 4th grade classroom in Dallas, Texas. The teacher asks for a show of hands:
"Hey kids, how many of you are Dallas Cowboys fans?"
Everyone in the class raises their hand, except for little Suzy. The teacher says:
"Little Suzy, I notice you didn't raise your hand. Why is that?" Little Suzy responds:
"Because I'm a 49ers fan!"
"A 49ers fan?," the teacher asks incredulously, "Why on Earth are you a 49ers fan?"
"Because my Mommy is a 49ers fan, my Daddy is a 49ers fan, so I'm a 49ers fan."
The teacher doesn't like Suzy's answer:
"Little Suzy, that's no kind of logic. What if your Daddy was a drug dealer and your Mommy was a p**...?"
Suzy doesn't blink an eye:
"Well then I'd be a Raiders fan!"

There is rumor of a new "Amish Flu" out of Pennsylvania...

the symptoms are low grade fever, and you will get a little hoarse and Buggy.

49ers Fan

On the first day of school, a first grade teacher explains to her class that she's a Seahawks fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they, too, are Seahawks fans. Wanting to impress their teacher, everyone in the class raises their hand except one little girl. The teacher looks at the girl with surprise, 'Janie, why didn't you raise your hand? 'Because I'm not a Seahawks fan' she replied. The teacher, still shocked, asked, 'Well, if you aren't a Seahawks fan, then who are you a fan of?' 'I'm a 49ers fan, and proud of it,' Janie replied. The teacher could not believe her ears. 'Janie please tell us why you're a 49ers fan?' "Because my mom's a 49ers fan, and my dad's a 49ers fan, so I'm a 49ers fan too!" "Well" said the teacher in a obviously annoyed tone, 'that's no reason for you to be a 49ers fan. You don't have to be like your parents all of the time. What if your mom was an idiot and your dad was a m**..., what would you be?' Janie smiled and said 'I'd be a Seahawks fan.'

At the 3rd grade violin rehearsal ...

... Donnie Corleone Jr. walks in, opens his violin case and unveils, to the shock of all, a tommy gun. The teachers are livid, panic nearly ensues, but Donnie just starts laughing uncontrollably.
"What's wrong with you? This is serious! Why are you laughing?"
"Because I just imagined dad holding up the bank with my violin."

A professor was giving a big test one day to his students.

He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait.
Once the test was over the students all handed the tests back in. The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying "A dollar per point."
The next class the professor handed the graded tests back out. This student got back his test, his test grade, and $64 change.

My highest test grade I'll always be proud of is my blood test...

A+

A middle-aged teacher named Mrs. Jackson saw one of her first grade boys making rude faces at the preschoolers on the playground

She said "You know, Liam, when I was a little girl I was told that if I made ugly faces it might freeze and stay like that."
Liam replied "Well sorry Mrs. Jackson, but you can't say you weren't warned.

English Class

A teacher was at the front of her 1st Grade English class. She points out a girl at the front of the class. She asks "Suzie, can you use 'Definitely' in a sentence, please?". Suzie says - "The sky is definitely blue". The teacher replies "The sky can be grey or black, but good try". Johnny at the back of the class raises his hand. "Miss, do farts have lumps?" The teacher was completely baffled replied "No Johnny, why?"
"Then I definitely pooped my pants"

My grades are telling me to be a trophy wife but my looks are telling me to study harder.

Johny the Fighter Pilot

A teacher asks the kids in her 3rd grade class: "What do you want to be when you
grow up?"
Little Johnny says: "I wanna start out as a Fighter Pilot, then be a billionaire, go to the most expensive clubs, find me the finest p**..., give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel throughout Europe, an Infinite Visa Card, and all the while bang her like a loose screen door in a hurricane."

The teacher, shocked and not knowing what to do with this horrible response from little Johnny, decides not to acknowledge what he said and simply tries to continue with the lesson. "And how about you, Sarah?"

"I wanna be Johnny's p**...."

What kind of eggs do Canadians prefer?

Grade eh?

A teacher asks her 2nd grade class...

"Who's a Trump fan?"
Not wanting to look s**... for not knowing what that meant, they all raised their hands except for Johnny.
"And why aren't you a Trump fan?" she asked, used to Johnny always trying to be different.
"Because I'm a Sanders fan" he replied.
"And why are you a Sanders fan?"
"Because mommy and daddy are"
"And if mommy and daddy were idiots, what would that make you?" she asked
"A Trump fan"

A young computer science student is on the phone with his father...

His father says: "so how have your classes been going?"
The son replies: "not bad. I did really well on my test on hexadecimal today! It was only worth fifteen points, but I'm still happy about it."
"Oh yeah? What grade did you get?"
"An F!"

My buddy Brian had a kid a few years ago. He comes to me this summer and he goes...

"Man, my son just flunked the third grade. I don't know how to tell him he will be held back a year."
I was like, "I guess you better tell him slowly so that he will get it."

Why did Tupac go to the gym?

To get a sixpac!
(Thank you 7th grade me)

I told my boss that when I get nervous, I like to imagine my audience n**......

... she said I should probably stop teaching the 2nd grade.

A first grade teacher was trying to teach her students about animals

She said "What does the fat Cow give us?"
Her students shouted out "Milk!" Unanimously.
She then said "Well done! Now, what does the fluffy chicken give us?"
Her students responded with "Eggs!"
She then said "Good work! Now for the last question. What does the big pig give us?"
Her students paused for a moment and they all shouted "Homework!"

My buddy just came to me all depressed and said My son flunked the third grade, and I just don't know how to break it to him.

So I said well…probably better tell him pretty slowly, so the little d**... will get it."

Johny was offered a nickel or a dime...

Johny was bullied by all the other second grade students. Every day, they would offer him either a dime or a nickel. Every time, he took the nickel. The kids would all laugh at him every time he took the nickel. One day a kid asked him why he always took the nickel, even though the dime was worth more. He quietly responded, "If I take the dime, they will stop offering me the money. I've made $20 already!"

A grade school teacher asks her students what their parents do for a living.

Billy proudly stands up and announces, "My daddy plays piano in a w**...."
The teacher is aghast and promptly changes the subject. Later that day, she calls Billy's mother and explains what Billy said.
Billy's mother says, "Actually, his father's an attorney, but how can we explain a thing like that to a seven-year-old?"

A woman is cleaning her daughters room when she stumbles upon her diary. She sees an entry that reads: "I lost my virginitty today"

The woman starts crying.
"How can this happen? I've given her everything. Why did she do this to me? She can't be serious about this. She's in 9th grade for gods sake. How does she not know how to spell virginity?"

I got pulled over by the police last night

They asked me where I was between 6 and 11. I told them I was in grade school.

I remember my first kiss.....

it was during recess, by the swings. Her name was Liz, she was in 4th grade. We were talking, I don't know what came over me, I grabbed her face and kissed her. It lasted about 10 seconds, we both awkwardly kissed each other, it took us both by surprise.
That night, it was all I could think about. Apparently, that night, she told her parents.
And that's why I can't teach in New York State anymore.

A student who never showed up to class or did the reading asked me to curve his final paper grade. I said yes.

I took a red pen, scratched out the grade on the paper, then rewrote the F in cursive.

"Did you hear about that actress who killed her self?"

"Did you hear about that actress who killed herself? Her name was Reese something-or-other... I don't remember."
"Witherspoon?"
"No, no... with her knife."
--
A joke my 5th grade teacher told me years ago

Soviet Joke

Moscow, 1985, 3rd grade class
Teacher: Life in Soviet Union is great, all families have a nice apartment, a car, all children have nice toys!
Little Kid starts crying
Teacher: Vladimir, why are you crying??
Little Kid: I wanna go to Soviet Union!!

I've never had a real girlfriend, besides that one in fifth grade...

Didn't really work out with me being a sophomore though.

A blonde student catches her teacher at his desk after class

She puts her arms on his desk and pouts saying "this class is hard, I would do anything to get a good grade on the final. Anything."
He leans in close and says "Anything? Anything at all? Would you.... Study?"

Student walks into professor's office

She says, "I'm just not doing very well in your class. I was wondering if there was anything I could do to raise my grade?"
The professor looks her up and down and asks, "What are you willing to do to raise your grade?"
"I'd do *anything*," she answers coyly, playing with her hair.
"Anything?"
"*Anything*!" she repeats with a knowing grin.
"Would you....study?"

What grade does a good student get in Canada?

Eh+

What does my girlfriend say when I tell her "You're as s**... as the day I met you."?

Stop saying that, we met in the 6th grade.

My father said now that I'm in 6th grade we should probably talk about s**...

I said let's just stay friends

Hey Prof, what can I do to improve my grade?

Prof: um... it's May
Me: LOL, sorry, what MAY I do to improve my grade?

Why did the robber go to the circus?

To steal the show. This joke was brought to you by my 2nd grade daughter. ;)

Mrs. Jones was giving a spelling test to her third grade class...

How do you spell the word 'straight'? asked Mrs. Jones.
Little Johnny shouts, S-T-R-A-I-G-H-T!!
Excellent job Johnny! And what does that word mean?
Without ice.

What grades do you need to join the navy?

7 C's

In eight grade my gym teacher gave me a D.

That's how I got an A.

A student receives a bad grade on his exam

And he goes to talk to the teacher, convinced that he's been graded unfairly.
He says to the teacher "I think I deserve some points on these questions, even if my answers weren't entirely correct!"
The teacher sighs and says "ok, I'll take another look at your exam".
The student comes home, and his mother asks him "so how did the exam go?". He replies: "the teacher thought it was remarkable!'

I'm not the smartest student ever so I tried something a little risky to get a better grade...

I got a D- on my recent English test and my dad wasn't very happy with my mark. I asked my teacher if I could do a s**... favour for her to get a B+. She got very offended. My classmates didn't think that was okay either, and they stopped talking to me for a few weeks.
If you guys want, I can tell more stories about my homeschooling

What are the toughest 4 years of a football player's life?

5th grade

The way I combed my hair in 7th grade

is the worst part.

Why can't you bury a man living east of the Mississippi in a graveyard west of the Mississippi?

He's still alive.
(Learned from my 6th grade math teacher Mr. Warren)

My fifth grade teacher taught me how to smoke p**... and kiss.

Best hire I've ever made as a school principal.

A teacher decided not to grade the tests her class took, and instead gave everyone an A.

She gave no Fs that day.

In 8th grade english class I wrote a script titled "The Pun"

The very first set description in the script said that the stage was to be painted over with random words and phrases.
When I handed in the assignment, my teacher came up to me and asked: "Why is your script titled 'The Pun' and why is the floor covered with phrases?"
"Because my script is a play on words!"

What grades did h**... get in art school?

Not C's

What did Sherlock Holmes say when Dr. Watson asked him what grade an eight year-old was in?

Elementary, my dear Watson!

A teacher is teaching a 5th grade class on Zoom.

The teacher says to Susie, "Tell the class why you want to be a teacher."
Susie says, "Actually, I want to be a stripper."
The teacher asks, "A stripper? I thought you wanted to do my noble profession."
Susie says, "That was before I saw your tiny apartment."

Grade joke, A teacher is teaching a 5th grade class on Zoom.

jokes about grade

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these grade jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.