Gown Jokes
24 gown jokes and hilarious gown puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about gown that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
If you're in the mood for a good laugh, you've come to the right place! This article contains a collection of the funniest gown jokes, from hospital gowns to dressing gowns and medical gowns to robes and costumes, complete with stirrups! Get ready to crack up!
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Funniest Gown Short Jokes
Short gown jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The gown humour may include short attire jokes also.
- Motherhood is like a fairytale... ... _*but in reverse*_
You start out in a beautiful ball gown and end up in stained rags cleaning up after little people. - A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that 'individuality' is the key to success.
- The end of school is pretty much the only time most guys will wear a gown and get on a stage. Maybe we should call it "draguation".
- What do you call it when someone's stressed out when wearing a gown? Constantly under duress
- As soon as the hospital made me put on one of those little gowns I knew the end was in sight
- Was told to unfold my graduation gown to get rid of the square creases replied that I'd rather graduate with more degrees.
- I'd advise you graduates to keep your graduation gown. It's the only outfit you might not outgrow.
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Gown One Liners
Which gown one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with gown? I can suggest the ones about toga and cloth.
- Why are wedding gowns white? Cuz the dishwasher should match the stove and the fridge
- What do you call a ball gown is corporate logos on it An address.
- What dress does a t**... wear? A ball gown
- I used to deal l**... to children But now, they're all gown up
Loads of Fun with Charming Humor Gown Jokes
What funny jokes about gown you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean glove jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make gown pranks.
I went to the doctor today...
He had me take off my clothes and put on a gown so he could complete a full physical. I was worried I would be receiving a prostate exam. Anyways, he walked back in and had me pull my gown up for the ole turn your head and cough check. When I did he took one look at me and said, "Very interesting....You have got to stop m**...." I asked why, he said, "Because I'm trying to examine you."
A 70 year old man buys his wife a present
For their 50th wedding anniversary a 70 year old man buys his wife a see through night gown
The next day he goes back to the store and returns it
Cashier: I'm sorry you were unsatisfied with our product. May I ask what was wrong with it?
70 Year Old Man: It was all wrinkled
A man comes home from a formal party with two black eyes
His roommate looks at him surprised and asks him how on earth it happened.
The man says there was a beautiful young woman wearing a formal gown at the party, and he noticed that her dress was riding up the crack of her b**....
"Obviously", he said, "that's embarrassing and I don't want her to walk around like that. So I pulled it out of her crack and she punched me in the face for it!"
"Okay, that explains the first black eye." Responds the roommate. "But what about the second one?"
The man says, "well, I figured she liked it there so I tucked it back in!"
A very old couple gets married and on their wedding night...
....they're getting ready for bed and this will be the first time they've ever slept with each other.
The woman comes out of the bath room and her husband is already in bed.
She drops her night gown and says "I should warn you, I have acute angina"
The old man says "I sure hope so cuz those t**... are n**..."
A lady goes to a gynecologist for a routine exam
She gets into the gown and positions herself into the stirrups. When the doctor comes in, he tells her that the exam may be painful and asked if she would like to be numbed. Afraid of the pain, she replies, please. The doctor says okay, this will just take a minute . The doctor puts on his gloves, lifts up her gown, begins to put his head between her legs and goes numb numb numb numb...
Unexpected morning s**...:
I stumbled into the kitchen to see my wife cooking our usual breakfast of soft-boiled eggs and toast.
Barely awake, I thought perhaps I was dreaming when she suddenly took off her gown and demanded I make love with her there and then.
Soon finished, she turned back to the stove and said thanks . I said, My pleasure, dear, you seemed so inspired, thank you!
Dryly, she drawled, Don't get used to it, the egg timer's broken.
A man walks into a bar...
...wearing a hospital gown and attached to an IV drip.
He asks the barman to give him a double v**... on the rocks.
Barman passes him one and he necks it back.
He asks the barman for another double v**... on the rocks.
Barman passes him another and he necks it back.
'I really shouldn't be drinking this with what I have,' the man says.
'What do you have?' the barman says.
'50 cents,' the man says.
So, I had a doctors appointment yesterday.
I was sitting in the exam room in the paper gown when in walks the most gorgeous doctor I've ever seen. She picked up my chart and looked over it for a few minutes. Finally, she looked up and said, "Mr. Cow, you're going to have to stop m**...." I said, "Why?!" She said, "Because I'm trying to examine you!!"
Psalm 129
A priest offered a nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg.
The nun said, Father, remember Psalm 129?
The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, Father, remember Psalm 129? The priest apologized Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.
Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way.
On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, Go forth and seek, further up you will find glory.
Nurse walks in to a patient's room
In a hospital room, a patient is lying in bed with an oxygen mask on.
A pretty, young nurse walks in and says, "I'm here to change your sheets!"
Patient says, "Please, nurse, are my t**... black?"
Nurse blushes and says, "I'm just here to change your sheets!"
Patient says, "Please, nurse, I'm begging -- are my t**... black?"
Nurse lifts up his sheet, pulls up his gown and thoroughly inspects his private parts. "Sir, it all looks fine!"
Patient slowly removes oxygen mask and says, "That was very nice, but ARE MY TEST RESULTS BACK?"
"Go forth and seek, further up, thy you will find glory"
A priest offered a Nun a lift.
She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg.
The priest nearly had an accident.
After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg instead of gear.
The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"
The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again.
The nun smiled and once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"
The priest apologized "Sorry sister but the grip is weak."
Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way.
On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, ''Go forth and seek, further up,thy you will find glory''
A man is laying in a hospital bed...
He has just taken a few tests, to find out what is wrong with him. He is feeling pretty awful, so he has an IV, and oxygen mask, etc. So the nurse walks in to see if the man needs anything.
Would you like anything? She says.
The man says, Yes, are my t**... black?
The nurse is very confused.
I don't know, sir. She says.
Please check, He says, if my t**... are black .
The woman is still confused, but she decides to check. She lifts up his hospital gown, sees that everything is in order, and puts it back down.
Well, sir, she says, you are fine. Your t**... are not black .
That's great, now listen closely, the man says, removing the oxygen mask from his face, *are my test results back?*
A young teenaged girl has her first trip to the gynecologist...
She gets taken to the examination room and the nurse tells her to s**... down, put the gown on, sit in the chair and put her legs in the stirrups. The girl is a bit overwhelmed, but she complies.
A few minutes later, the doctor comes in, takes a quick glance at the girl's chart and then sits down on his stool, rolls up between the girl's legs, sticks his head under her gown and starts poking around. At this point he realizes the girl's legs are shaking tremendously, so he peeks out from under the gown to see the girl's face turning eight shades of red and covered in sweat.
He quickly grabs her chart again to read it completely, then says, "Oh goodness! Is this your first time at a gynecologist's?"
She nods and quietly replies, "Yes."
The doctor then says, "Well, if you think it'll make you feel better, I'd be happy to numb you first."
The girl shrugs her shoulders and says, "Okay."
So the doctor puts his head back down deep between her legs, shakes his head and goes:
"NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM...."
