The Best 27 Goodnight Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Goodnight jokes. There are some goodnight kiss jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these goodnight groucho puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Goodnight Jokes and Puns

As I was telling my grandfather goodnight over the phone, he proceeded to tell me "the height of conceit."

Which in his own words:

"You know the height of conceit son? A flea floating on his back down a river, sporting a hard-on, yelling 'OPEN THE DRAWBRIDGE' "

That man.

Little Johnny goes to his parents' room to say goodnight

He walks in and sees them having sex. They continue and Johnny runs out of the room. When they are finished, Johnny's mom tells the dad to talk to Johnny about what happened. The dad looks all over the house, but can't find Johnmy,. Finally, he goes in the kitchen and sees Johnny raping the grandmother. The dad tells "SON, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" Johnny says, "Don't like it when it's your mom, do you?"

how do socks reproduce?

they have socks. goodnight folks

Goodnight joke, how do socks reproduce?

What's worse than a whale with a sore tooth?

Going to kiss your grandmother goodnight and she slips you the tongue.

I don't what all the fuss is about the helium shortage...

The helium supply will always be on the rise.

THANK YOU GOODNIGHT


What do you get when you cross a muppet with the Loch Ness monster?

Messie

Thank you and goodnight.

I think my cell mate is gay...

He closes his eyes when I kiss him goodnight.

Goodnight joke, I think my cell mate is gay...

Goodnight

sweet prince

I've never actually been caught smoking weed.

But I'm pretty sure my parents know sober people don't give goodnight handshakes.

How many astronauts have probed Uranus?

Zero... there's too much gas.

THANK YOU ALL AND GOODNIGHT!

Ever wondered if your mother kissed you goodnight after giving your father a blow job?

.

.

.

.

You are now!

You can explore goodnight bedtime reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean goodnight norma dad jokes. There are also goodnight puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


My wife says I have a problem with alcohol abuse.

I politely told her I don't. I managed to stay calm and kiss her goodnight even though I was getting so angry.

When she went to bed I punched my bottle of Jack Daniels.

"Dad can we go to a haunted house?"

Dad: What's wrong with the one we live in?

Son: WHAT?

Dad: Goodnight son.

*Tucks in shirt*

"Goodnight, shirt."

What one word really makes a woman open up and want to talk about everything on their mind?

"Goodnight."

You're not a homosexual when you kiss your homie goodnight...

Goodnight joke, You're not a homosexual when you kiss your homie goodnight...

How do cops say goodnight to their kids?

"...YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN silent."

A man stands up to give a toast at his best friend's wedding

He says "I was told that a wedding toast should only last as long as the groom lasts in bed. So goodnight everyone!"

They say if you do what you love, you'll never work a day in your life...

And they're absolutely correct because the only thing I love is not working.

I hate my job.... goodnight


My wife never say anything during sex. The only thing she says right before we start is

Goodnight hun... Funny, this pillow sure smell like chlorof...

Why did Satan cross the road

Because his mum is gay, thank you and goodnight.

What's a sharks least favourite name?

Ned
___

So I have my Alexa set up to tell me joke when I say goodnight, last night it told me that joke...and I can't work it out?! I have searched for it online, and other people have searched for it but no one has seemed to find out what it means.

Am I being stupid and missing something obvious? Did I have a half asleep fever-dream and imagine this non-joke?

My wife can't wrestle..

But you should see her box.

Sleep is for the weak

So I'm going to bed, goodnight

What is an old person's favorite flavor of gum?

Retire-Mint


^Thank ^you, ^goodnight

Fighting Couple

A married couple were fighting. Deciding it was time to go to bed, the husband says, "Goodnight, mother of six!" to which she replies Goodnight father of two!"

What do you call a chinese chap with one leg?

Limping



Thank you, goodnight.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the goodnight goodby jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working goodnight adieu piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes