Good Jokes

Funniest Good Short Jokes

Short good jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The good humour may include short nice jokes also.

1. When I was growing up # was pound, not hashtag Good thing it changed, since "pound metoo" would've been sending the wrong message
2. My girlfriend dressed up as a policewoman and told me I was under arrest on suspicion of being good in bed. After 2 minutes all charges were dropped due to a lack of evidence.
3. Trump tests positive for COVID-19. He finally passed a test without cheating, good for him.
4. My girlfriend said, "You act like a detective too much. I want to split up." "Good idea," I replied. "We can cover more ground that way."
5. Son In iraq I killed 15 people. Son: Dad you were a helicopter mechanic
   Dad:Never said I was a good one
6. Joke from my 12 year old why do you never see elephants hiding in tree? Because they're so good at it!
   Please don't ban me
7. I used to sell security alarms door to door, and I was really good at it. If no one was home, I would just leave a brochure on the kitchen table.
8. Antiwork did an interview on fox News to try to create a good public image of their sub It didn't work.
9. Give a man a shirt, and he'll wear it once Tell a man he looks good in it, and he'll wear it for a lifetime
10. I arrived early to the restaurant. The manager said do you mind waiting a bit? I said no. Good, he said. Take these drinks to table nine.

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Good One Liners

Which good one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with good? I can suggest the ones about cool and pleasant.

1. I'm really good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don't know why.
2. How can you tell good cops from bad cops? Easy. Good cops carry a Goodge.
3. I built a 1:1000000 model of a German submarine. It's a pretty good µ-boat.
4. Schrodinger took his cat to the vet. The vet said, I have good news and bad news.
5. A lot of women actually turn into good drivers So if you're a good driver watch out.
6. Why is C the only good letter in the English alphabet? Because the others are Not-Cs
7. I saw my dad chopping up onions today and I cried Onions was a good dog
8. Today I quit drinking for good now I only drink for evil
9. What do you call a woman who's really good at darts? Amy
10. My deaf girlfriend just told me, We need to talk. That is not a good sign.
11. Why are lawyers buried 12 feet under? A: Because deep down they're really good people.
12. How do fortune tellers greet each other? You're good, how am I?
13. The three most well-known spy agencies are the CIA, KGB, and MI5. The rest are good.
14. A girlfriend is like a good US president I'd love to have one
15. Just got a bike for my wife. It was a good trade.

Know Any Good Jokes

Here is a list of funny know any good jokes and even better know any good puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What do you call a belt made out of lobsters? A waist of good seafood
  I know it's bad but I heard it in a dream and had to share
• My daughter just got me good… I said, Did you know you can always see your own nose and your brain just ignores it? She said yeah because it NOSE it's there
• Listen guys, I know this sub is all in good fun, but I don't think it's right to be making dumb jokes about obese people. They already have enough on their plates.
• Complementing a mustache should be a good thing I don't know why she took it as an insult.
• A good way to get to know your date is to ask about their first pet, favorite movie, and mom's maiden name.
  Then login and read all their emails.
• the recipe for marble cake is not what you might first think it is. Totally unrelated topic - anybody know a good dentist?
• Donald Trump has done so much good for American education. Now instead of citing my sources on an English paper, I can just write down, "I know it, you know it, everybody knows it."
• Did you know woman turn into good drivers. So be careful while they turn, because they might hit you.
• Did you know that bats aren't actually blind? That's why they are so good at hitting baseballs
• I own a three legged dog. It had four legs when I got it, but I wanted people to know that I'm a good person.

Have A Good Day Jokes

Here is a list of funny have a good day jokes and even better have a good day puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• My girlfriend dumped me today saying I was too childish But today is opposite day so it's all good
• I asked my girlfriend if she'd like a day of eating ice cream and hanging with her girl friends. She said "Yes!". I said "Good, because I'm breaking up with you."
• I'm being attacked by Russian hackers! Sorry! Is mistake. Russian people not do such things! Have good day.
• What's the difference between the lost city of Atlantis and Florida? About 3 days
  In all honesty though, my thoughts and good wishes go out to the people of Florida,
• Today's a really good day... 10/10
• When i was a boy, i had a disease that required me to eat dirt three times a day in order to stay alive... It's a good thing my brother told me about it
• My boss told me to have a good day so I went home.
• I messaged my ex on the day before my exam. I asked if she had any good cheating tips
• A banana a day they said was good for cleaning the colon It was a week before I realised you have to eat them
• My friend at work got the Johnson and Johnson vaccine and said he didn't feel too good the next day I told him, "What do you expect from taking two Johnsons at once?"

Got Any Good Jokes

Here is a list of funny got any good jokes and even better got any good puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I met a girl at a club the other night & she told me she'd show me a good time. When we got outside, she ran a 40 yard dash in 4.8 seconds.
• Doctor: I've got good news, and bad news Patient: What's the good news?
  Doctor: They're gonna name a disease after you.
• I just got the new iPhone for my wife All things considered a pretty good trade.
• I got a puppy for my daughter... Good swap if you ask me.
• I'm so good with managing money I got a letter from a debt collector saying 'outstanding payment'
• My girlfriend got her good looks from her father He's a plastic surgeon
• "Do you think I'm good at golf, dad?" asked my son, before his tee shot. I said, "You've got a fairway to go yet."
• I lost a good friend and long time drinking buddy a few days ago in a tragic accident he got his finger caught in a wedding ring
• I got a dog for my wife. It was a good trade.
• So I bought a memory foam pillow second-hand Got it for a good price, all was good until I laid down and it said "who the f@#k are you?"

How To Tell Good Jokes

Here is a list of funny how to tell good jokes and even better how to tell good puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Tonight, while telling my grown children some dad jokes, my 34 y/o son hit me with… What's the difference between dad and an ice cream truck? The ice cream truck has Good Humor!
• I was telling jokes at a bar filled with LGBTQ+ people I was doing such a good job nobody could keep a straight face.
• I've been interrogating the dog for two solid hours.
  He still won't tell me who's a good boy.
• A lot of my friends tell me I'd look good in a straitjacket But I don't think I could pull if off
• When I was a kid, I loved milk so much that I said I was going to marry a cow Took me a good few years to realise why my father used to tell me, You probably will...
• How do you tell the difference between good Comedians and bad ones? The Bad ones Punch up the screwline.
• Why is Bruce Lee so good at telling jokes? Because if his punch line doesn't work, you still get a kick out of it.
• My girflriend was telling me about this guy on Strange Addictions who drinks a gallon of brake fluid every day I guess the good thing is at least he can stop whenever he wants
• Tell you what, it's lucky that those Kids trapped in the cave in Thailand are footballers It means they're already good divers.
• How do you tell if a girl is ticklish? You give her two test tickles I will see myself out. Thank you and have a good day

Laughable Good Jokes for Instant Grins & Giggles

What funny jokes about good you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean awesome jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make good pranks.