Following is our collection of funniest Goats jokes. There are some goats mules jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these goats oxen puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
A married couple drove down a country road for several miles, sitting in silence. An earlier discussion led to an argument in which neither would concede their position.
As they passed by a barnyard full of mules, pigs, and goats, the husband sarcastically asks: "Relatives of yours?"
'Yup,' the wife promptly replies. 'In-laws'
The country boy takes his friend out on his farm and says "I'm going to show you what we do for fun around here." So he takes one of his goats, sticks its head in the fence and starts having his way with it. After he finishes he says to the city boy "Your turn." So the city boy walks over to the goat and sticks his head into the fence next to it.
Why do Scotsman wear kilts? Cause sheep can hear a zipper at 50 yards.
Why do the English wear trousers? Cause goats are deaf.
Does anybody know where I can find some goats?
And says "I would like a goats head please." And the Welshmen says "alright, one goats head." And then the Englishmen says "no I don't want a Welshmen's goat, I want an English goat." And the Welshmen says "oh you want an English goat alright, I will take the brains out."
.... they run into a barn to hide. The brunette hides behind a stall of cows, the redhead hides in the goat pen, and the blonde hides behind bags full of potatoes. The police come in and shine their flashlights on the cows. The brunette says "MOO!" and the police shine their lights on the goats. The redhead says "BAHH!", so the police move on to the potatoes. They shine their lights on them and the blonde says "POTATOES!!!"
All the goats have been moved to an undisclosed location and are awaiting to be reunited with their respective farmers.
My black flag brings all the goats to the yard,
and they're like like "allahu akbar",
watch out, I'll put a bomb in your car,
I'd teach you, but I lost my arms
Getting the grass stains off my back.
Silly people should know by now, it's also goats, horses, cows, basically anything with a hole...
Nor sure how you're going to get 100 goats on a plane though
Source: radio
You can explore goats graze reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean goats sheep dad jokes. There are also goats puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
1272AD - Arab Muslims invent the first condoms using the lower intestine of goats.
1856AD - English farmers improve on the idea by first removing the intestine from the goat.
They evolved this way to have a hillbilly rape alarm.
Sheep and goats!
Goats can hear a zipper from a mile away.
Dang baby goats just eat everything!
he kept mountain goats.....
A pimp
We heard raising goats is pretty difficult.
My neighbour isn't unknowingly raising my goats.
It's called the Billy gene and causes them to believe that the kid is not their son.
Meh.
Their kids are nice and tender.
There are two goats on top of a hill eating grass. One says to the other I wish this was the kind of grass that gets you high. The other says did we not just climb this hill?
Goats can hear a zipper a mile away
One is a monster that scares Mexicans, the other eats their goats.
Which is why I keep a large number of goats in my gardenβ¦
So it's not too hard on the goats.
Guess I didn't offer her father enough goats.
I recently learned that goats can have what's called a "phantom pregnancy." It's when their body thinks it's pregnant when it isn't.
I kid you not.
Bisexual.
They have square eyes, they can see fourth dimensionally
Because goats can hear zippers.
Just kidding.
One goat said to the other, "Pretty good, huh?"
The second goat said, "Yeah, but not as good as the book".
So they can get welfare for all their kids.
Goats can't speak.
The first goat says "*This film is pretty good"* and the other one replies: "*Yeah, it's OK but the book was better."*
The goats rebelled and had a muttony
A lamb shank.
All I'm saying is that I love baby goats.
Yeah they snuck 2 goats on each plane
And the priest welcomed Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and Muhammad Ali to his sermon.
I just want to be able to talk about my kids.
,A PIMP
Cute kids.
If you have 15 cows and 5 goats what would you have?
Plenty of Milk
Nah, just kiddin' they milk everyone of fun
That's how you get kidnapped.
A Satyr
Everyone came dressed as goats.
Most things escape baby goats.
I guess you could say I have a bleeting heart
Cows, sheep, goats, and/or reindeer.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the goats flock jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working goats movie studio goats piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.