Goal Jokes

Funniest Goal Short Jokes

Short goal jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The goal humour may include short target jokes also.

1. TIL of a reality show where the goal is to do as much drugs as possible without dying or getting caught. It's called the Tour de France.
2. I'm pleased to announce Reddit has achieved its goal in becoming one of the top 10 green companies in the world! The front page is now made up of over 90% recycled content
3. I'm halfway towards my goal of becoming filthy rich. Now I just have to have to figure out the rich part.
4. Why do old people like golf? Just like in their life, the goal is to get the least amount of strokes before you go in the hole
5. When I was young, I set a life goal for myself: I will buy a Lamborghini at the age of 40. This year, I've finally achieved half of the goal. I turned 40.
6. Before my buddy died I asked him if there was football in heaven. A few days later I saw his ghost. He said
   "Good news, there is. Bad news, you're playing in goal tomorrow."
7. the miracle of being a teen mom when you get pregnant young and your baby is born, hes feet are so small but even so he manages to stomp your dreams and goals.
8. Decided to set myself a goal of 25 books this year. Finished last night! That Suess guy really makes some great reads!
9. What are your career goals? Me: I'd like a job in agriculture.
   Why?
   Me: It's a growing field.
10. Did you guys see the goal from half field today in the World Cup? It was a great U.S. attack from Midway

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Goal One Liners

Which goal one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with goal? I can suggest the ones about objective and mission.

1. I had a goal to lose 20 Pounds by the end of the year. 30 pounds to go
2. What do you call a girl who's preventing you from reaching your goal? A keeper
3. I only had one goal in life: to become a better dad than my dad was. My dad beat me
4. I did it! I followed my goal to save $20 from each paycheck in 2020. I have $60.
5. Our goal was to play D&D all day today but... No dice.
6. How do you keep bears out of your backyard? You install goal posts.
7. What's the worst thing that can happen to a football player? To have no goal in life.
8. How do schools of fish meet their annual goals? They call in a-fish-in-sea experts.
9. What is an evil cow's ultimate goal? Udder mayhem
10. Soccer is a strange game. Soccer is a bunch of people running away from their goals.
11. What do vasectomies and breathalyzers have in common? The goal is to blow a zero.
12. My one ambition in life: Set myself more goals.
13. Why did the boy fail to become a footballer ? He didn't have any goal in his life
14. What's the goal of a Jewish football game? To get the quarter back.
15. What was Jared from Subway's fitness goal? Getting in to smaller pants

Own Goal Jokes

Here is a list of funny own goal jokes and even better own goal puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I brought my girlfriend to watch one of my soccer matches. When an opponent was about to score a goal, she stormed the field and prevented it with her bare hands. She's a keeper.
• If you're interviewing for a fast food job and they ask about your short and long term goals Short term : I want to work at McDonalds
  Long term : I don't want to work at McDonalds
• My parents told me to work until my bank balance looked like a phone number I'm happy to say that I've achieved my goal, and am retiring with $911.
• Ex wife to her departing Husband.. You'll never find someone like me again!-
  Husband …
  That's my goal!
• My new year's resolution for 2023 Is to accomplish the goals of 2022 which I should have done in 2021 because I promised them in 2020 and planned them in 2019
• How many Polish soccer players does it take to score a goal? 2: One polish player to score the goal, and one polish goal keeper to try to stop him.
• My dog does back-flips when the Raiders kick a field goal....... my buddy asked me what he does when they score a touch-down and I told him I didn't know, I've only had him for 6 years.
• Some breaking English football news. Arsenal are to allow their goal keepers, to train without a mask,
  club doctors confirm.
  There's no way they can catch anything..
• My goal in life is to get my face on a coin. That way I can be the change I wish to see in the world.
• I started watching football (soccer) because I could see it's very relevant to my life... Little to no goals.

Scored Goal Jokes

Here is a list of funny scored goal jokes and even better scored goal puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Which country have scored the most world cup goals? The mongoals.
• What's a geriatric? A German footballer scoring three goals.
• Neymar. Either he is going to score a Goal today or score an Oscar today.
  One thing for sure.!
• Did Torres play for every other EPL club before Chelsea ? .... Because he never celebrated scoring a goal.
• How many goals did Germany score? A Brazillion.
• A father was fetching his son home from a soccer game. Dad: How was the game, son?
  Son: I scored three goals!
  Dad: That's great! What was the score?
  Son: 0-3
• The manager for Chelsea FC swapped their defender for another one. The opponent scored 2 goals back to back straight after. "Oops, wrong sub.", said the manager.
• Chuck Norris once scored a field goal, using a hockey stick!
• It's been my life dream to score a point at a soccer game... I finally accomplished my goal!
• Yesterday we lost the match with 3-1, but at least we scored once. That was our goal.

Field Goal Jokes

Here is a list of funny field goal jokes and even better field goal puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I left my illustrious football career behind to become a relatively successful farmer. Field goals
• Track and field is perfect for introverts. The goal is the be there the shortest time possible.
• Rumor has it that distraught Chicago Bear's field goal kicker Cody Parker tried to end his life recently. The bullet went wide right.

Goal Setting Jokes

Here is a list of funny goal setting jokes and even better goal setting puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• For 2021, I'm setting a goal for myself to find a girlfriend. One that is faithful and actually wants to be with me. I just can't let the wife find out.
• I set a goal to read the entire dictionary last week but for whatever reason I lost all interest and stopped somewhere around apathy.

Entertaining Goal Jokes to Laugh Out Loud Fun with Everyone

What funny jokes about goal you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean purpose jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make goal pranks.