Glued Jokes

Following is our collection of merchandise humor and fasten one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Glued puns for adults, dirty velcro jokes or clean stuck gags for kids.

There is an abundance of reattached jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 20 funniest jokes on glued. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any glue witze you can hear about glued.

The Best jokes about Glued

My author friend claims that he 'accidentally' glued himself to his autobiography, but I don't believe him.

But that's his story, and he's sticking to it.

I found my boomerang with RAM glued to it

Man that thing brought back memories

I ended up in jail the other night and the guys across from me had glued themselves together...

It was very confusing.

What did the writer say when he glued himself to his book?

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

My friend claims he glued himself to his autobiography and I don't believe him

Anyway that's his story and he is sticking to it

My girlfriend won't let me spank her during foreplay

So I glued her buttcheeks together. Well I guess if you can't beat them, join them!

Book Jokes.

I read a thriller in Braille.
You can really feel the suspense.

I'm reading a book about Anti-Gravity.
It's impossible to put down.

I read a book about submarine construction.
It's riveting.

I'm reading a book about adhesives.
It has me glued to my seat .

I read a book on suicide.
It had me on the edge of my building.

Feel free to insert more. :)

I glued a picture of my deceased parrot onto my boomerang.

It brings back good memories.

Siamese Cat

My girlfriend wanted me to buy her a Siamese cat.

My mate told me that they are really expensive, so I've bought 2 normal cats and glued their heads together.

My friend glued a fake beard on to look like Jason Momoa

I don't think he could pull it off very well

Three monkeys in a tree

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree?

Because he was dead.

Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?

Because he was glued to the first monkey.

Why did the third monkey fall out of the three?

Peer pressure.

What do you call an aminoacid glued to an Australian?

A glutamate.

The World Cup kicked off in Brazil this week and, like many Americans, I was glued to my TV...

Watching something else.

Yesterday I glued my palms to the kitchen floor

It's hands-down the best decision I've ever made

If I glued dollar bills to my sneakers, what would you call them?


I didn't turn up to an important appointment today as I accidentally glued myself to my autobiography.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

I told my dad that I glued all my A* papers to my ceiling.

He said, "Keep up the good work."

I accidentally glued my index finger to my thumb

It's OK

I glued a fish to a wall once

Have you ever seen a fish stick?

Last Christmas my parents got me a pair of flip flops with matchbox cars glued to the bottom..

Cheap Skates!

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes