Glory Jokes
48 glory jokes and hilarious glory puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about glory that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Glory Short Jokes
Short glory jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The glory humour may include short fame jokes also.
- Why's the leader of Russia always late? Is trick question. If Comerad Stalin appears late, it is only because we were early. All glory to mother Russia.
- Did you hear about the undercover cop who uncovered a glory hole in a public toilet? Turns out he received an anonymous tip.
- I developed a successful chicken social network app to make more money. I didn't do it for the glory I did it to make hens meet.
- Autumn is best enjoyed in all her glory. Unfortunately, the police officers who arrested me outside her window didn't agree.
- Jesus tells Peter, "Come forth and you shall have eternal glory!" Peter came in fifth and won a toaster.
- A man on crutches walks into his local Ice-Cream shop.. He asks the lady behind the desk for a Knickerbocker Glory.
She says; "Crushed nuts?"
He says; "No, a sprained ankle" - ...And Jesus said to Peter, "Come fourth, and you shall receive eternal glory!" But Peter came fifth, and had to eat the biscuit.
- Why did the man from Bilbao boast when he won the marathon? He wanted to Basque in his glory
- My mates wife died 2 months ago and he is already seeing someone else. That's what you call mourning glory
- Went to a Catholic Church for the first time... When did they start putting glory holes in the confessionals?
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Glory One Liners
Which glory one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with glory? I can suggest the ones about glow and glorious.
- What's the worst part about working in a glory hole? You only get paid in tips.
- Why do police officers frequent glory holes? To receive anonymous tips.
- I got a part-time job at the gas station glory-hole... ...I make my money on tips.
- If I were to make a glory hole... I would make it out of walnut.
- You know your voting in San Francisco when... The voting booth has a glory hole.
- What's the best place to find anonymous tips? A glory hole.
- If you don't know what a glory hole is… Don't look into it.
- I went to a glory hole once. It s**....
- Did you hear about the glory hole job opening? The s**... s**... but the tips are good.
- The problem with glory holes… … they can only spread by word of mouth.
- Some people call it a glory hole I call it a walnut
- I wanted to get a job at a glory hole But then I heard the bosses were d**...
- [Dirty] What do you call a tear in the American flag? An old glory hole.
- How is a glory hole like a rooster crowing? They're both a c**...-a-dude'll-do.
- A Gladiator's Favourite p**...-Category? Glory holes.
Playful Glory Jokes to Add Joy and Laughter to Your Group
What funny jokes about glory you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean honor jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make glory pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An Englishman, an Irishman, a Welshman, and a Scotsman are all on a hot air balloon.
The conductor almost panicked says, there's too much weight! Someone needs to jump off, or we're going to c**...! The Welshman bravely steps up, For the glory of wales! And the Welshman throws himself off. The conductor still panicked says, okay, we're close but there is still too much weight! The Irishman, in a patriotic manner yells, For Ireland! And throws the Englishman off
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why was the FBI argent happy after he visited a glory hole?
Because he received an anonymous tip.
A Soviet official is visiting a mental asylum
To prepare for the visit, the asylum trained the patients to sing "Glory to the Communist Party".
When the official arrives, everyone is singing their hearts out. The official is very pleased, however, he notices a woman not singing.
The official approaches the woman and asks: "why aren't you singing?"
The woman replies: "I'm a nurse, not a patient"
We all know that there's a divide in the lepidopterist community...
We all know that there's a divide in the lepidopterist community, and that traditionally most of the glamour goes to the entomologists who study the butterflies, because they're so pretty and colorful, rather than the brown and grey moths. So for 364 days a year, the butterflyers get all the glory. But today is the day when we recognize the contributions of those devoted lepidopterists who chose a less glamorous, but no less important, path. Happy mothers day.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
There's a new hotel in town that features glory holes but you'd never know from the name.
The walnut Inn
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Surgery
After her fifth child, Jane decided that she should have some cosmetic surgery "down below" to restore herself to her former youthful glory because her gammon was dangling a bit too low and looked like a ripped out fireplace. Time and childbirth had taken its toll and she reckoned that, with five children now being the limit, she'd tidy things with a n**... here and a tuck there so it looked more like a piggy bank slot rather than a badly packed kebab.
Following the operation she awoke from her anaesthetic to find three roses at the end of the bed.
"Who are these from?" she asked the nurse, "They're very nice but I'm a bit confused as to why I've received them". "Well" said the nurse, "The first is from the surgeon - the operation went so well and you were such a model patient that he wanted to say thanks".
"Ah, that's really nice" said Jane.
"The second is from your husband - he's delighted the operation was such a success that he can't wait to get you home. Apparently it'll be the first time he's touched the sides for years and he's very excited!".
"Brilliant!" said Jane." "And the third?".
"That's from Eric in the burns unit" said the nurse..............he just wanted to say thanks for his new ears."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So our local s**... bank got shut down
Turns out it was just some old pervert who set up a glory hole.
A man gets out of the shower flaunting his nakedness to his wife.
While he is walking towards her in all his glory he asks what would people think if I went out on the street like this?
People would think I married you for your money .
Cops have released a statement on the discovery of "Glory Hole" in the bathrooms of a hugely prestigious college sorority house.
Police are looking into it.
And are preparing a probing investigation.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What did Popeye say to the glory hole?
Ah guh guh guh guh
