Globe Jokes
79 globe jokes and hilarious globe puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about globe that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Enjoy these jokes about globes and see how society can still make light of global issues! Learn what the world has to offer in terms of snow globes, light globes, and even the Golden Globe Awards, and laugh your way through each joke as CERN sheds light on our global society.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Globe Short Jokes
Short globe jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The globe humour may include short planet earth jokes also.
- I was arguing with a flat Earth believer We argued about how many members the flat Earth community had. He said "We have members all around the globe".
- A flat earth conspiracist was boasting about how many people believe that the Earth is flat... He said, We have supporters all around the globe!!!
- Did you hear the Flat Earth Society is really gaining ground? They say they have members all around the globe now.
- in the beginning God created Man and said "I have created the perfect woman and wife for you, and put her in all four corners of the globe" then he made the world round and LAUGHED.
- Catholicism has 1.2 billion followers around the globe, second only to Islam with 1.8 billion But that's okay because the Catholic church doesn't mind coming in a little behind.
- This is ridiculous. It's July 6th and people are still setting off fireworks. One almost caught our christmas decoration on fire.
- My parents spin a world globe and randomly point out their next vacation destination. That's how they drowned.
- I was pretty mad when they told me my flat earth movie was nominated for an award. Golden globes
- Tributes from around the globe are still pouring in after the death of Sir Roger Moore… The one from Vladimir Putin read: "From Russia, with love."
- The Flat Earth society have made a new documentary.... .....which has been nominated for the Golden Globe award.
Share These Globe Jokes With Friends
Globe One Liners
Which globe one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with globe? I can suggest the ones about universe and global.
- the flat earth society ... ... has members all around the globe
- I got a globe for my birthday. It meant the world to me.
- I just met the man who made the globe I keep on my desk! It's a small world.
- The Flat Earth Community has supporters all around the globe.
- Where are Flat Earth believers? All around the globe.
- FunFact The flat earth society members are all around the globe!
- I really hope there are no Golden Globe winners working in the Flat Earth Society.
- What's another name for a flat-earther? A Globe-a-phobe.
- My mother left only an ancient globe as part of her last will It meant the world to me.
- What happens when you put a globe in a microwave? Global warming.
- I hate to travel... Mostly because my dad used to beat me with a globe.
(cr - There are a bunch of flat earth theorists... ...They are all over the globe.
- One of my most prized possessions is an antique globe, it means the world to me.
- I saw Stranger Things has 6 golden globe nominations... Should have Eleven.
- Have you seen the new globe they're making? It's revolutionary
Snow Globe Jokes
Here is a list of funny snow globe jokes and even better snow globe puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I bought a crystal ball but only ever predicted very cold winters. Turns out they sold me a snow globe.
Light Globe Jokes
Here is a list of funny light globe jokes and even better light globe puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- How many contractors does it take to replace a light globe? Two. One to buy the wrong size globe, and another to replace the existing light fitting to suit the new globe.
Golden Globe Jokes
Here is a list of funny golden globe jokes and even better golden globe puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why didn't the flat-earther accept his award at the ceremony? He didn't believe in golden globes.
- Welcome to the 2018 Golden Globes Where Hollywood will pat itself on the back and several men will pat Hollywood on the front
- So I learned something yesterday when I tuned into the Golden Globes Black dresses matter
- Lots of famous people here tonight. I mean, legends, iconic. This table alone. Al Pacino, Robert De Niro. Baby Yoda—oh, that’s Joe Pesci, sorry.
Hilarious Globe Jokes that Bring Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about globe you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean galaxy jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make globe pranks.
Did you hear about the anemic guy that cut all the grass on earth in a square pattern?
He mow globe in cells
What do the Globetrotters do when they're finished urinating?
The Harlem Shake
A giant globe fell on my son's face.
He's currently in hospital with sphere injuries.
The flat earth movement is really taking off..
There are flat earthers all around the globe
Fans around the globe are rockin' out to Mariah Carey's latest hit single ...
"*The Monitors Are Down ...*", performed live for the first time today in downtown New York City, has been praised for a unique nihilistic style and pertinent statements regarding the internet-induced apathy of today's youth.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man falls over and lands on a globe.
He heads to the doctors.
The doctor asks what's wrong.
"I've got this spain in my a**...."
I was really unsuccessful and unpopular until I stood on a globe covered in super glue.
Now I have the world at my feet.
TIL there are two Slavic nations located on the opposite sides of the globe.
They are North and South Poles.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How do we know global warming is fake?
Because the Earth is flat, not a globe!
If Homer Simpson goes to see the Scottish Play, what beer does he drink at the Globe?
MacDuff.
i went to a fancy dress party dressed as a globe and didnt speak to anyone all night.
I was in a world of my own
How do we know the Earth is flat?
Because maps are flat
But what about a globe?
Oh that? It's just a map wrapped around a sphere
Ive travelled the globe trying to convince people the earth is flat
No one understands the gravity of my message
It's about time we took flat-earthers seriously.
After all they have members all over the globe.
I dropped some hair removal cream onto my globe.
Now I feel like I've got the world at my Veet.
A Globe was walking down the street.....
It saw Central America crying on the curb.
The Globe asked, "Why are you crying?"
Central America sobbed, "Because....I will never get any snow!"
The Globe retorted, "Well, NOT with THAT latitude!"
The flat earth movement have a proud announcement to make:
We now have followers all around the globe.
Hey guys, the flat earthers want you to join their cause.
They are recruiting all over the globe.
Today, something disturbing is announced on the news.
"Flat Earthers claim to have members all around the globe."
I accidentally ran into a guy that once sold me an antique globe.
It's a small world.
We Call her Ms. Worldwide
She's got a figure like the globe
As a 'Flat Earther', can I make it clear that we are not some dumb fringe group...
...We have members all over the globe!
Us flat-earthers have numbers that are growing exponentially.
In fact, our group can be found all over the globe
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many racists does it take t**... change a light globe?
None, they prefer to remain unenlightened.
Join the flat earth society! We don't discriminate, because...
We have members all around the globe.
Yes. Flat earth is truly a global movement with a great sphere of influence.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A questionable article on marine biology goes viral.
"**New study reveals migrating Crows' droppings may be responsible for great barrier barrier reef bleaching**"
The article receives widespread criticism from the scientific community. Marine biologists across the globe insist that coralation does not imply Cawsality.
Shakespeare once said "the entire worlds a stage",
His theatre in London is literally called "the globe".
Came to me while folding laundry (bad nerd pun incoming).
What was the name of the first Protozoa to circumnavigate the globe?
Flagellan
Did you guys hear about the globe that got pressed flat into vinyl album?
Yeah, it was a world record.
I was a globe earther until...
I was a firm believer in the globe earth model until a life-changing event happened. What was that event? I got kicked by a horse in the head.
how many people have been vaccinated all across the globe?
i dont have the exact number, but its probably moderna few.
Flat-earthers have heard their theory is spreading around the globe
They don't believe it.
What could we call an international chain of hotels catering to vampires?
Hema Globe Inns
(Thoughts on this OC?)
