The Best 48 Givin Jokes

Following is our collection of funniest Givin jokes. There are some givin sayin jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these givin havin puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Funny Givin Jokes and Puns

I'm giving my order at Burger King.

I ask for a Triple Whopper with cheese, and extra mayo. The 20-ish girl in line behind me says, "Do you know what that will do to your body?"

I turned and replied, "Nothing, compared to what my body will do to it."

You know who's not giving anything up for lent?

Rick Astley.

Giving birth is terrible for a cow's hips…

…but it's great for their calves.

Givin joke, Giving birth is terrible for a cow's hips…

They're giving away Marshawn Lynch jerseys at my local sports shop.

But I think I'll pass

I'm giving away parachutes for free.

No strings attached.

Was giving a door counselling.

We didn't get anywhere at first but he soon opened up to me.

I'm not the best at giving advice when it comes to tequila

So you'll have to take it with a grain of salt...

Givin joke, I'm not the best at giving advice when it comes to tequila

I'm giving up on the argument...

From now on I will pronounce it 'gif'.

I tried giving my cat a bath...

but I keep getting hair in my mouth

They're giving Caitlyn Jenner ANOTHER TV show

Apparently, they have her competing in the Olympics again. It's going to be called "Drag Races".

I am giving up eating red meats.

I'm going cold turkey.

You can explore givin dun reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean givin passin dad jokes. There are also givin puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

My SO is giving me the silent treatment, so I tightened all the lids of our jars.

Now she'll have to talk to me.

Some of you are giving nihilistic pessimism a bad name...

And I don't care for it.

I'm giving up spray deodorants for the new year

Roll on 2017

Giving Christmas presents always reminds me of what myself and Lil Wayne have in common

We're both terrible wrappers

Giving birth isn't as painful as being kicked in the nuts

I've never heard a man say 'let's do that again' afterwards

Giving birth in 2017

Woman: Doctor, is it a boy or girl?
Doctor: I dont know, we'll have to wait for it to decide.

I'm giving up alcohol for a month!!!

Correction: I'm giving up! Alcohol for a month!!

im giving up alcohol for a month

Oops, I meant "I'm giving up; alcohol for a month!"

I'm giving up alcohol for a month.

Wait sorry, that didn't come out right: I'm giving up. Alcohol for a month.

I believe in giving jobs to the mentally disabled...

but we shouldn't elect them President.

They're giving Steve Irwin a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame

He's being put right between Sting and Billy Ray Cyrus

If you're giving a gift, what two things can you never put in the present?

the past and the future

I've been giving the wife a lot of oral sex lately.

When she gets bored she just puts her ear plugs in.

DMX is going to jail for 5 years for Tax Evasion

Looks like the Government is gonna be givin it to him.

24 was giving holiday bonuses...

One got their bonus; two got theirs; three got one; four got one; five was ready to receive but didn't get anything; six got a bonus...five looks at 24 and says "what's up?" 24 tells five that it wasn't a factor.

I was giving my girlfriend...[NSFW]

...oral sex. She wanted to get in on the act so we started to 69.

...changed my hole perspective.

Some consider giving the middle finger to be a religious gesture

It's a sign of the crossed.

I kept giving all my male test subjects iron.

it kept turning them into girls. I don't know why.

I'm giving up spreadsheets for forty days


I'm giving away my roof for free

Don't worry, it's on the house.

Giving birth...

Is a crowning achievement.

How is giving someone a love letter similar to being a hitman?

You always say "The deed is done"

I'm giving away my chimney for free.

It's on the house.

I'm giving away a broken puppet.

No strings attached.

I am giving up drinking for a month

Sorry that came out wrong

I am giving up. Drinking for a month

After giving birth, how will Cardi B lose weight?

Cardi O

I'm giving away my legless parrot for free.

No perches necessary.

Giving up smoking is so easy

I've already quit about 70 times this year.

Did you know they're giving out free AirPods in all Apple stores

If you go in with a gun and a mask

After giving it some thought, I decided to turn myself into the police this morning.

It was a fun ride, arresting people and taking their drugs, until I got busted for impersonation.

They weren't giving out free batteries at the store. However mine didn't work and I went there for an exchange.

Just because it's free of charge doesn't mean I'll take it.

I'm giving up masturbating for an entire month.

Sorry, bad punctuation.

So this dude's giving a lecture

about how two negatives can make a positive but two positives can't make a negative, when a voice from the lecture hall shouts:

"Yeah, Yeah!"

Somebody was giving me a synopsis of their crossover fan fic that includes a killer clown, a talking dog, and a flying house and at the end they said

"That about sums it-up"

I've been giving my cows weed to make their meat taste better

The steaks were high, but were otherwise delicious

Giving up

I'm giving up drinking for an entire month.

Sorry, poor punctuation.

I'm giving up! Drinking for an entire month.

I'm giving up drinking till christmas

Bad punctuation, can't edit title

I'm giving up. Drinking till Christmas.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the givin talkin jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working givin puttin piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes