Girl In The Mirror Jokes
22 girl in the mirror jokes and hilarious girl in the mirror puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about girl in the mirror that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Girl In The Mirror Short Jokes
Short girl in the mirror jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The girl in the mirror humour may include short young girl jokes also.
- A girl looks at the mirror and says "Mom, I look really ugly, can you compliment me and make me feel better?" The mother says "Wow you have really good eyesight!"
- This morning I said to the mirror: "You will go there now and you will ask the girl you like out!" My mirror then went there and asked the girl I like out.
- I think my mirror is broken I said pumpkin spice latte 3 times in front of it and no white girl in yoga pants appeared.
- What Did The Guy Say To Impress His Crush? Hey girl, are you a mirror? 'Cause I can see myself inside of you.
- The other day, I was looking for mirrors in the furniture store and none of them looked visually appealing. No wonder girls don't want to date me.
- Today I saw a girl driving while texting, applying makeup, AND adjusting her mirrors I was so shocked I spat out my beer
- My wife got mad at me for checking out a girl while I was driving. I replied, "Isn't that why it's called a rear view mirror?"
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Gather Around for Heartwarming Girl In The Mirror Jokes and Uplifting Humor
What funny jokes about girl in the mirror you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mirror picture jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make girl in the mirror pranks.
David Beckham gets in a taxi at Dublin Airport and notices the driver keep looking in his rear view mirror at him.
After about 5 minutes the driver says "Go on then give me a clue!?"
Beckham replies, "I had a glittering career with Man Utd, played over 100 times for England and married a spice girl, is that enough?".
Driver says "No mate, I meant where are you going?"
Kiss The Mirror
A middle school for girls was faced with a unique problem. A number of girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirrors leaving dozens of little lip prints. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called several of the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the custodian. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every day. To demonstrate how much work they were making for the custodian, she asked him to clean one of the mirrors while the girls watched. The custodian took a long-handled brush, dipped it into the nearest toilet, and proceeded to scrub the mirror. From that day on, the problem of lip prints on the mirrors was completely eliminated.
A middle school in Oregon
According to a radio report, a middle school in Oregon was faced with a unique problem. A number of girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirrors leaving dozens of little lip prints.
Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the custodian. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every day. To demonstrate how difficult it was to clean the mirrors, she asked the custodian to clean one of the mirrors. He took out a long-handled brush, dipped it into the toilet and scrubbed the mirror.
Since then there have been no lip prints on the mirror.
Lipstick Girls
A principal of a small middle school had a problem with a few of the older girls starting to use lipstick. When applying it in the bathroom they would then press their lips to the mirror and leave lip prints.
Before it got out of hand he thought of a way to stop it. He gathered all the girls together that wore lipstick and told them he wanted to meet with them in the ladies room at 2pm. They gathered at 2pm and found the principal and the school custodian waiting for them.
The principal explained that it was becoming a problem for the custodian to clean the mirror every night. He said he felt the ladies did not fully understand just how much of a problem it was and he wanted them to witness just how hard it was to clean.
The custodian then demonstrated. He took a long brush on a handle out of a box. He then dipped the brush in the nearest toilet, moved to the mirror and proceeded to remove the lipstick.
That was the last day the girls pressed their lips on the mirror.
A blonde girl gets pulled over by a blonde police officer for speeding...
The Police officer asks for a drivers license & the blonde starts going through her bag looking for it.
She's getting increasingly frustrated as she looks for the drivers license & asks the police officer for assistance.
The blonde asks: "I'm having trouble finding it... Can you please tell me what it is suppose to look like?"
The officer responds: "Sure, it's just a square that has your picture on it."
After a bit more rustling through her bag, she pulls out a square mirror and hands it to the police officer.
The police officer looks at the mirror and says: "Oh, I'm so sorry... I didn't realise you were a police officer! You can go"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How do you drive a girl insane?
Give her new clothes and lock her inside a room without a mirror
Maker
A grandfather and granddaughter were sitting and talking when the young girl asked, "Did God make you, Grandpa?"
"Yes, God made me," the grandfather answered.
A few minutes later, the little girl asked him, "Did God make me too?"
"Yes, He did," the older man answered.
For a few minutes, the little girl seemed to be studying her
grandpa, as well as her own reflection in the mirror, while her
grandfather wondered what was running through her mind. At last she spoke up.
"You know, Grandpa," she said, "God's doing a lot better job
lately."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A young lady is at a home decoration store, and picks out a large mirror with a brass hanger.
The helpful store clerk says, "M'am, you wanna screw for that mirror hanger?"
The girl replies, "No, but I'll blow you for that matching brass end table."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A mother and her young daughter are going home by taxi at night...
after some time they're passing by the red-light district and the young girl discovers some prostitutes on the street. She asks her mother: "Mom, what are they doing?"
The mother replies: "They're just guarding the parked cars."
The taxi driver intervenes: "Don't let your mother b**... you - they're w**...!"
The mother turns red and sinks down in the back seat annoyed and disappointed by the driver.
A few moments later the little girl asks: "Mom can w**... get children too?"
The mother starts smiling spitefully and looks the driver in the eyes through the driving mirror... "Sure, where else do you think all the taxi drivers come from?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Magic Mirror
This is a rumour that a magic mirror resides in New York City. Anyone who can tell the truth in front of it is granted 3 wishes of their choosing. Anyone who tells a lie is exploded.
3 girls, a blonde, a redhead and a brunette find the mirror and try to claim their wishes.
"I think I'm the prettiest girl in the world!" says the brunette.
She explodes on the spot.
"I think I'm the smartest girl in the world!" says the redhead.
She explodes on the spot.
"I think-" says the blonde.
She explodes on the spot.
A taxi/cab driver picks up a drunken girl
A taxi/cab driver is driving down the street in the early hours and spots a drunken girl alone struggling to walk,
He pulls over and says "do you need a taxi love to get you home"
She says "yes" and gets into the rear seats.
The driver makes eye contact with her in the rear view mirror and asks where she's going and sets off
She says "thanks for helping me, the address is blah blah blah but I have no money to pay you"
Then she hitches up her short skirt exposing her lady parts and says "but I do have this"
The driver sighs and says
"Have you not got anything smaller".
The lipstick problem
My local middle school had a problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Every night, the maintenance man would remove them and the next day, the girls would put them back. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night. To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Blonde, brunette, and a redhead
Once upon a time, there was a blonde, brunette and a redhead... And there was a magic mirror. If you went up to the magic mirror and said something true, nothing would happen to you. But if you went up to the magic mirror and said something false, you would disappear.
So the redhead goes up to the mirror and says, "I think I am the prettiest girl in the world!" *p**...* she disappears.
The brunette goes up to the mirror and says, "I think I am the prettiest girl in the world!" *p**...* she disappears.
The blonde goes up to the mirror and says, "I think" *p**...* she disappears.
The magic mirror
Some say that there is a magic mirror in a shopping ladies room that could grant any wish if you tell it the truth, but will make you disappear if you lie in front of it.
Once there was a beautiful brunette that found this mirror and said:
- I've been thinking a lot and I think I'm the hottest brunette on earth!
*puff* and there she ceased of exist.
Then came a heartbreaking redhead and said:
- I've been thinking a lot and I think I'm the hottest redhead on earth!
*puff* and there she goes too.
Then came a blonde, the most pretty girl you can imagine.
- I've been thinking... *puff*
New (Periodic Table) Element
A new element added to the PERIODIC TABLE :
Name: Girl
Symbol: Gl
Atomic weight: Don't even dare to ask.
Physical properties:
1. Boils at any time,
2. Melts when handled with love and care,
3. very bitter when mishandled.
Chemical properties:
1. Very reactive,
2. Highly unstable,
3. Possesses high affinity to gold, platinum, diamond, branded clothes and other expensive items.
Nature:
1. Money reducing agent.
2. Volatile when left alone.
Occurrence:
Mostly found in front of the mirrors.
