Girl Fart Jokes
46 girl fart jokes and hilarious girl fart puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about girl fart that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Girl Fart Short Jokes
Short girl fart jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The girl fart humour may include short fart smell jokes also.
- At a disco: He: Wow, what's a cute girl like you doing in a corner all alone? - She: I had to f**....
- One girl was so fond of the boy that when he f**... she took the blame.
(She admitted that she had f**...) - What do you call it when you hold a Jewish girl under the covers and f**...? A dutch oven...
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Girl Fart One Liners
Which girl fart one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with girl fart? I can suggest the ones about farted and fart bombs.
- I've got a dog that farts more than i do.... at least that's what girls think.
- At the disco: "So whats a cute girl like you doing all by herself?"
"I had to f**..." - First conversation after marriage Girl: All shy...
Guy: Ok, relax! You can f**.... - What do you call a girl who can f**... to the tune of Jingle Bells? Carol
- The w**... I smoked was so funky.. I asked my girl friend if she just f**....
- Girls don't f**.... They keep it in and it comes out as drama.
Hilarious Fun Girl Fart Jokes That Will Have You Rolling with Laughter
What funny jokes about girl fart you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean fart sound jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make girl fart pranks.
A guy drops a sword from the sky. When he gets off he sees a girl crying. He says "What's wrong?" The girl says, "Well, a sword fell from the sky and killed my cat. Another guy drops a gun from the sky and sees a boy crying. He asks "What's wrong?" He says "A gun fell from the sky and shot my dog." Another guy drops a bomb from the sky and sees a little boy laughing. He asks, "What's so funny?" He says "My mom f**... so hard the house blew up!!"
A blonde, a red head, and a brunette were on a plane.
The red head takes a bite of an apple doesn't like it she throws it out the window.
The brunette takes a bite out of an orange doesn't like it she throws it out the window.
The blonde takes a bit of a bomb doesn't like it she throws it out the window.
They get out of the plane.
They come up to a little boy asks why he is crying! he says "An apple fell on my dog and killed my dog."
They keep walking and come up to a little girl and asks why she is crying. She says" An orange fell on my cat and killed my cat."
They keep walking.
They come up to a blonde laughing her head off.
"Why are you laughing so hard?" they said.
"When I f**... the building blew up!"
A very popular girl went to her doctor and found out that she was pregnant.
The doctor says, “I know that you are not married! Do you know who the father of this baby is?”
The girl thought and then asked, “Doc, if you ate a can of Baked Beans, would you know which bean made you f**...?”
One morning when I was going out of the house I met my neighbor's daughter who was pregnant.
When I returned home I saw her father closing the door.
I told him: "Your daughter hasn't married yet I wonder how it is possible a girl without any husband be pregnant?
For a moment her father with a bitter smile said: "She isn't pregnant; it is all wind in her belly. She farts and would recovery."
Next year perchance I saw the same girl with a baby in her arms.
Next day when I was going out facing her father so I told him: "I saw your daughter with her f**... in her arms."
A girl promises to teach her boyfriend what 69ing is.
He lies down on the floor and she squats down over his face to assume the position and farts. Embarrassed she stands up and apologises. She squats down for another go but farts again, she gets up and apologises again.
Before she can have a third go, her boyfriend gets up and goes to walk out saying yeah this isn't really for me, I'm not having 67 more of those in my face
Three men are on an airplane...
One of them has a knife, one has a gun, and the other has a bomb. The first guy with the knife, realizes that he cannot go through with h**... the plane, so he throws the knife out the window.
The second guy, with the gun, also decides that he cannot go through with h**... the plane, and throws his gun out the window.
Alas, the third guy also makes this decision, and throws the bomb out of the window.
Their plane lands sometime later and they decide to grab a drink at the bar. Upon walking up to a bar they notice everyone is gathered around the tv, watching intently. It shows 3 children...
"what happened?" the men ask the fellow patrons.
"shh, just watch"
On TV:
Reporter: "Son, why are you crying?"
Kid 1: "My daddy got stabbed by a knife from the sky!!!"
The man that threw the knife out realizes that it was his knife and feels horrible...
Reporter: "Little girl, why are you crying?"
Kid 2: "My daddy got shot from a gun falling from the sky!!!"
The man that threw the gun out realizes that it was his gun and feels horrible...
Reporter talking to the final child: "Kid, why are you... laughing?"
Kid 3: "My daddy f**... and the house blew up!!!!"
A priest, a thief, and a soldier.
(Long)
A thief, a priest, and a soldier were all in a plane that's about to c**.... They each decide to drop something so they can look for it just in case they survive. The priest drops a bible, the thief drops a knife, and the soldier drops a grenade.
The plane crashes, and, miraculously, they survive. They go their separate ways and begin to search for their items.
The priest is walking around and see's a little girl crying. He says "Little lady, why are you crying?" and she looks at him and says "The holy book came down and killed my Doggy!" and then she ran away.
The thief is trudging about and also see's a little girl crying. He looks at her and says "Little girl, why are you crying?"
And the little girl screams, "A knife came from the sky and killed my mommy!" and then she ran away.
Now the soldier is looking for his grenade and sees a little boy laughing. The soldier says, "Little boy, why are you laughing?" and the boy says "My daddy f**... and the building blew up!"
A group of men are flying in a plane.......
they get bored and decide to drop an orange out the window. They land the plane and overhear someone crying. They find a young girl crying so they ask her what is wrong. The young girl said "My mother was just hit in the head with an orange and died!". The men shrugged it off and got back on the plane. Once in the air they got bored again so they decided to drop an apple out of the plane. The plane lands and they overhear someone crying. They find a young boy in tears. They ask him what's wrong. The boy replies "My father was hit in the head with an apple and died!". Once again the men shrugged it off and got back on the plane. They get bored once again but this time they decide to drop a bomb out of the window. The plane lands and they hear someone laughing. They find a man rolling on the ground in laughter. Confused the men ask him what's so funny. He responds "I f**... and this building behind me blew up!"
Three Woodcutters & The w**...
Three woodcutters were finishing up a hard, four-month stint in the forest. They had not seen or heard anything other than the trees and the sound of their axes that entire time. They packed up, and headed to the nearest town.
After getting sufficiently drunk, they decided to visit the town brothel. Upon entering, the madam became nervous at the sight of the three men because she had only two girls working that night. She thought on her feet, and decided to bed the drunkest looking woodcutter with a blow-up doll.
After all was done they met downstairs to compare notes. The drunkest woodcutter said: "She was okay at first, but a little too quiet. So I bit her n**..., then she let out a huge f**... and flew out the window."
3 men are riding in an airplane over their city
3 guys were in a Cessna Airplane flying over the city they lived in. The first man said "I love my city so much, I'm gonna drop this 50 cent coin out the window for someone to find. That will make their day!" So he threw it out.
The second man pulled out a roll of coins and said "I love my city so much that I'll throw this whole roll of coins out the window! And he threw it out.
The third man hated his city, so he pulled out an incendiary grenade and said "I hate my city so much I'm dropping this out the window!" So he pulled the pin and pitched it.
Later that day, the third man was walking through the streets when he saw a little girl crying, so he asked her what was wrong. She said "both my dad and grandpa were hit by coins that fell out of the sky! Now my dads in the hospital with a coma and my grandpa got startled and had a heart attack!"
After the man consoled the little girl, he kept walking until he saw a boy rolling around laughing on the sidewalk in front of a pile of charred wood. When the man asked him what was so funny, the kid said
"I f**... and my house burst into flames!"
Two rich men and a t**... are on top of a building...
...and the two rich men decide that they will each throw a coin off the top of the building, and see who collects it at the bottom. The first man throws a silver coin, but it does not go very far. The second man goes, "Hah! I bet I can throw farther than you!" and throws another silver coin, a bit farther. The t**... says,"I am sure I can throw a bomb farther than the both of you." He then proceeds to lob his bomb a lot further than the other two men.
Once the men get down, they decide to see what happened to the coins and the bomb. At the place where the first man's coin landed, they see a boy crying. "What's wrong?", they ask. The boy replies,"Daddy got killed by a silver coin from the sky!" The two men shrug, and keep on going. They get to the place where the other man's coin landed, and see a girl crying on the sidewalk. "Whats wrong?" they ask again. The girl sobs, "We were outside walking and grandma got hit on the forehead by a silver coin and died!" The two men shrug again and walk off to the place where the bomb landed, expecting a whole family to be in tears. However, when they get to the place, they see a boy laughing his head off in front of a smoking crater, with his dad scratching his head in the background. "What in the world happened here?", asked the businessmen. The boy replies, "Daddy f**... and the house blew up!"
A priest, an Army Man, and a Teacher
A priest, an army man, and a teacher are all in a helicopter. The helicopter starts to go down, so the pilot says quick everybody through anything you have on you to lighten the chopper! So the teacher throws her apple, the priest throws his bible, and the army man throws his grenade.
The helicopter lands safely, and the army man starts walking around when he sees a little girl crying. "Little girl, little girl, why are you crying?" The little girl answers, "an apple fell out of no where and hit me in the head!"
The army man continues walking until he stumbles upon another crying girl. " little girl, little girl, why are you crying?"
The girl responds, "a bible came out of no where and hit me in the head!"
The army man is walking again and sees a little boy rolling around laughing. He walks up to the boy and asks, "little boy, little boy, why are you laughing so hard?"
The boy laughs and says, "my grandpa f**..., and the house behind him blew up!"
A guy meets a girl at a bar, and they go back to her place...
When they get inside, the girl asks the guy if they want to 69. The guy is a country boy come to the city, and has no idea what that is.
"Well, you put your head between my legs, and I put my head between yours."
The guy thinks this sounds fun, so he agrees.
They head to the girl's bedroom, disrobe, and get in bed. But right as the guy gets his head between her legs, she accidentally farts.
He pulls back and gasps: "Agh! What was that?" Embarassed, she tells him to keep going and try again.
Just as he gets his face between her legs, she accidentally farts again. The guy retches, stands up, grabs his clothes and starts to leave.
"Wait!" The girl yells, "Where are you going?"
"Ma'am, if you think I'm sticking around for 67 more of those, you're crazy."
3 men board a plane.
As the plane was flying over their destination, one of the men threw a apple out of the plane. The second man threw an orange out of the plane and the third man threw a bomb out of the plane. When the plane landed, the men got out of the plane and went their separate ways. The man who threw the apple sees a girl crying and asked her what was wrong. She replied with "an apple fell from the sky and hit my head." The second man sees a small boy crying. He asks him what happened and he replied with "an orange fell from the sky and hit my head." The third man sees an old man laughing as hard as he can. He asks him what was so funny and the old man replied with "I f**... and that building over there blew up!"
Not sure if repost. It's one of my favourite jokes.
A plane ride.
A Canadian, an Irishman, and a Mexican are on a plane. So they're flying over Mexico and the Mexican dropped a coin because he loves his country. Then, they fly over Ireland and the Irishman dropped a coin because he loves his country. But when they flew over Canada the Canadian dropped a bomb because he hates his country. The next day the Mexican was walking down the street and saw a little boy crying so he asked why. The little boy said "A coin fell down and killed my Mom!". The same day the Irishman was walking down the street and saw a little girl crying so hr asked why. The little girl said "Because a coin fell down and killed my sister!". The next day the Canadian was walking down the road and saw a little boy laughing so he asked why. The little boy said "I f**... and my neighbours house blew up!"
Sorry for the length.
Three men are on a plane
all three of them have weapons. Halfway through the flight an attendant notices the weapons. She tells the men they cant have the weapons on the plane. The first man drops his arrows from the window. The second man drops his gun from the window. The third man drops his bomb.
After the plane lands, the third man is walking along. He notices a little girl crying.
"Little Girl, why are you crying?" He asks
"My dad just got hit by an arrow." she replies.
Sheepishly he runs away. Then he meets a little crying boy.
"Little boy, why are you crying."
"My dad just got shot by god. It just came from the sky."
The man begins to feel bad. Then he sees a little boy laughing.
"Little boy, why are you laughing."
"I just f**... and my house blew up!"
Man Periods
I'd hate to meet the girl of my dreams right now, because I, am on my man-period! No, let me explain: a woman would HATE to meet a s**... guy while on her period, because she knows it would mess up the part of her act where she pretends NOT to be berserk.
A man-period, is that special 2 to 3 days a month, when your unstoppable Juggernaut farts register on a seismograph. My last f**... sounded like a tornado went through a bassoon factory. I passed so much gas – Exxon called me up with an extraction lease, and the Department of Defense charted up a contingency plan.
I Shot The Dog
A women was pregnant with triplets.
One day she goes into this bank as it was being held up. She gets shot 3 times in her stomach, but luckily she lives.
She goes to the doctor who tells her her children will be all right, one day the bullets will come out.
So 13 years later, one triplet, a girl, runs out of the bathroom and says "MOM, MOM, I WAS GOING TO THE BATHROOM AND A BULLET CAME OUT!" So the mother tells her the story.
The next day the second daughter comes out and says the same thing, "MOM, I WAS GOING TO THE BATHOOM AND A BULLET CAME OUT!"
On the third day the son comes out and says "MOM, MOM!" she goes "Let me guess, you were going to the bathroom and a bullet came out?" he replies "No I f**... and shot the dog"
Girl farts at the dinner table
A young man introduces his fiancee to his parents. While they were having dinner the girl gently farts. Annoyed by the funny smell the father in law yells:
-Rocky!!
The girl is relieved that the future in-law blamed the dog from under her chair but after a few minutes she lets one more rip. The boy's father is getting nervous:
-Rocky!! be careful now!!
Worried no more the girl fires another one. Feeling exasperated, the boy's father yells:
-Rocky! Get out of there fast! She's gonna sh*t on you!
A young korean couple are lying in bed...
When the guy starts f**... nonstop.
The girl, unable to take the smell, says, "Stop, that's disgusting!"
"Don't blame me", the guy says. "It's the dog."
"Oh, don't blame him", she says. "He was cooked perfectly."
English Class
A teacher was at the front of her 1st Grade English class. She points out a girl at the front of the class. She asks "Suzie, can you use 'Definitely' in a sentence, please?". Suzie says - "The sky is definitely blue". The teacher replies "The sky can be grey or black, but good try". Johnny at the back of the class raises his hand. "Miss, do farts have lumps?" The teacher was completely baffled replied "No Johnny, why?"
"Then I definitely pooped my pants"
Two drunk men visit a brothel
The madame takes a look at them and tells her manager: Go and put inflatable dolls in their bedrooms.These guys are too drunk to notice.
After finishing their act ,on their way back ...
1st drunk: I think my girl was dead as she never made a noise or made a move. Upon this the 2nd drunk says: Mine was worse....... I think she was a witch!!!
1st drunk: Why would u say that???
2nd drunk: Well i gave a little love bite on her b**........She f**... in my face and flew out of the window.
A teacher, a nurse, and an Army man were in a hot air balloon.
The balloon was too heavy so each of them dropped something off it. The teacher dropped an apple, the nurse dropped her medical bag, and the Army man drops a grenade. After they land, they go for a walk. They come across a little girl who's crying. They ask her what's wrong and she says an apple fell out of the sky and knocked out her new puppy. Later they come across a little boy who is also crying. They ask him what's wrong and he says a bag fell from the sky and knocked out his new kitten. Then they come across a little girl who's laughing really hard. They ask her what's so funny and she says "I f**... and the building behind me blew up!"
When I found out that girls f**..., I was in my 8th grade gym class.
The girl that I had a crush on let one rip while stretching, and I took the blame for it. I decided to ask her out after class that day as well. Needless to say, her parents were called and I lost my job.
A Woman Walks Into A Cafe
A woman goes to a cafe and takes a seat outside. While she's eating, she overhears a group of men at the next table.
"Look, let's go with the simple option. It's spelled W-O-O-M."
"No, I'm sure there's an R in there. W-O-O-M-R."
"I thought it was longer than that, and had a B. W-O-O-M-M-B-R-R."
Finally the woman has had enough. She walks over to the table and says, "Gentleman, the word you're looking for is W-O-M-B, w**...." With that she walks off, the men staring after her.
Finally, one of the men turns back to the others. "Do you think she's right?"
"Of course not. A slip of a girl like that, I don't suppose she's ever heard an elephant f**...."
A teacher asked her class to use "definitely" in a sentence.
"The sky is definitely blue," said one girl.
"Nice try but the sky can be black or purple or even orange," replied the teacher.
"The grass is definitely green," said a little boy.
"Well... The grass can be brown too."
Little Johnny raised his hand.
"Yes Johnny?"
"Are farts solid?" asked little Johnny.
Finding this an odd question she was slightly shocked, but answered anyway, "No Johnny."
"Well I definitely pooped my pants."
A sweet young girl walks into an elevator at Macy's, trailing a cloud of expensive perfume.
She brags to the elderly woman who was inside, Coco Chanel $900 per ounce.
The lift reaches the second floor where the old lady is about to get off. As she steps out of the elevator, she rips out a rumbling f**.... Trailing a heavy cloud, she smiles sweetly and announces, broccoli, 49 cents a pound.
A newly wed couple have be living together for a few months.
Every morning the guy wakes up and lets out a long loud f**....
The wife says, one morning when you wake up you are going to blow out your insides.
A few months later it's thanksgiving and the wife is prepping the turkey. With a smirk on her face she takes the turkey guts and goes to the bedroom. Carefully puts it all in her husbands shorts.
A few minutes later she hears him scream like a little girl. 30 min later he shows up in the kitchen. Says, well hun, you were right. But thanks to vaseline and these two fingers i got it all back in!
3 guys are on a plane
First guy throws out an apple and the other two ask him why he threw it out and he said to see where it would land.
Second guy throws out an orange and the other two ask him why he threw it out and he said to see where it would land.
Third guy throws out a grenade and the other two ask why and he says to see where it would land
So they go to find their stuff they first see a boy crying and ask why he is crying and he says an apple hit his head so they move on.
They then come across a girl crying and ask why she is crying and she says an orange hit her head so they move on.
They come across a boy laughing and ask what's so funny and he says grandpa f**... and the house exploded.
Guy stops the car at the red light
Looks around and notices a beautiful girl.
He waves, she waves back. He winks, she winks.
He opens the window, she opens the window.
Then he asks "What's up? You also f**...?"
A guy moves his mom into a nursing home, settles her in, and heads home
As she's sitting in her chair watching Golden Girls, she slumps over to the side and has a strange expression on her face.
Seeing this, one of the caretakers rushes over and props her back up.
Then, during Matlock, she slumps again and is promptly attended to.
During Wheel of Fortune, the same thing happens again - then it was time for dinner and finally it was time for bed.
The next day, the son comes back and says, "mom, how was you first day?"
She says "The food's alright, but they won't let you f**..."
